I knew of a few people who treat intelligence above any other character trait. My dad was raised in such a family, he was called a retard and that he would not be able to get good marks on the university exams. He still speaks so proudly that he got first place and how that "showed his dad" But it only makes me sad. He did not have to get first place, to prove himself after all.
Intelligence is something you are born with, and it is limited. It is under no one's control. Autistic people, or disabled people in general having to "prove themselves" with their intelligence, the thought of that disgusts me.
I once got called "that girl is not very smart is she" by one of my uncles, whom i suspect also verbally abused my dad the same way. I remember that day clearly, i cried so much afterwards. I felt like i was a disgusting person who should not exist.
Some years later, that uncle had a brain surgery that caused the loss of memory, and most of his brain functions. He was bedridden and had to live with a caregiver afterwards. When i think of this, i feel guilty too. Because i somehow, wanted to prove it to him that intelligence means nothing in this world because it is not certain that you will have it. And later, when something like that happened i felt conflicted. I felt like my anger and sadness that day caused this even though i know it is impossible.
Still i felt sorry for him, and i hope he was in peace when he died a few years later. In the end, everyone is powerless against what fate has in store for them. It made me think that. And shaped my beliefs about such people.
Intelligence is something you are born with, and it is limited. It is under no one's control. Autistic people, or disabled people in general having to "prove themselves" with their intelligence, the thought of that disgusts me.
I once got called "that girl is not very smart is she" by one of my uncles, whom i suspect also verbally abused my dad the same way. I remember that day clearly, i cried so much afterwards. I felt like i was a disgusting person who should not exist.
Some years later, that uncle had a brain surgery that caused the loss of memory, and most of his brain functions. He was bedridden and had to live with a caregiver afterwards. When i think of this, i feel guilty too. Because i somehow, wanted to prove it to him that intelligence means nothing in this world because it is not certain that you will have it. And later, when something like that happened i felt conflicted. I felt like my anger and sadness that day caused this even though i know it is impossible.
Still i felt sorry for him, and i hope he was in peace when he died a few years later. In the end, everyone is powerless against what fate has in store for them. It made me think that. And shaped my beliefs about such people.
