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Being Peter Pan Forever

  • Author Author Geordie
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  • Blog entry read time Blog entry read time 1 min read
My mother is always unhappy with me going out in the same boyish outfit every day ? T-shirt, fitted hat, long shorts and overly-colorful sneakers. She says if I wear like this every day, I?ll never find a girlfriend. I just said, ?okay??

I know better, though. I?d rather spend a ton on expensive sneakers than on a treat for my ball-and-chain. I want to be a boy forever. I don?t want to assume the responsibilities of taking care of another person, and then, a whole family.

I think only the rich can afford to take care of children. I read from ?The New Wealth of Nations? that on Jobs.com, full-time caregivers are priced at around US$135,000 every year, perhaps even more. How can I afford this large sum of money? I think I can feel happier with a fraction of the money to just enjoy the pleasures of having some new kicks. Oh, and I do wear them, and wear them out.

Comments

King_Oni
I kinda have that going on I guess. Peter pan syndrome.

I'm 29, but I don't feel like it, and I'm surely not like every other 29 year old. My interests are... I wouldn't say childish, but at least they're not neccesarily "grown up" either. I like toys and cartoons (both things which are less of a weird and taboo-ish thing nowadays thanks to nerd/geek culture). Add in a few other things that one can consider juvenile and "not adult". I don't care for a big lot of "grown up" stuff. I don't want kids, I'm a relationship for the fun... and primarily just the fun. Luckily I don't have parents telling me that this is wrong.

The times I encountered people who thought it was wrong, was when I had girlfriends, that were in that transition phase from being a young adolescent up to a "grown up". Without going into the entire Asperger's deal back then (since I didn't know), I just felt that what they wanted with life didn't work for me. "Get a job, save money, get a career, look for a nice appartment, get a driving license and a car"... anything but a white picket fence I guess. Those usually spelled the end of my relationships since my life, outlooks on life and my entire person revolves a lot about being a sensible (not neccesarily responsible) adolescent, rather than a full fledged "grown up" that, by peer pressure has the obligation to do X and Y (and I'm not even talking about getting a job and earning money).

I always called this the fine print when people tend to hang out with me. Don't expect me to go all serious, responsible and "grown up", chances are that if I didn't do that at age 20, age 25... I surely won't have a change of mind at 29 (almost 30).

The biggest irony in all this, is one of my ex girlfriends shared first name of Peter pan's girlfriend. :laugh:
 
Geordie
Hahahaha... Real life Peter Pan :P

Well, we all have our states of mind. Why fit into others' frame of mind of maturity, when we simply lead different lives from others? We aren't the 'others', after all.

Glad to see a fellow Peter Pan here. I'm happy to be here, because we Peter Pans in our Neverlands still have something worthy for our world :D
 
King_Oni
I actually wonder if should change where I'm from, from The Netherlands to "The Neverlands" XD
 
Geordie
Maybe Neverlands is our real home, yeah? :D

Also, I have to add this, being immature has its perks. Without real commitment to a family, we make our world less crowded in the future. We can reduce food shortage... Haha. World peace!

And those toy manufacturers still have dough to make :D
 
King_Oni
I'm quite sure that I cannot deal with kids and someone else in the same house 24/7, who is not my mom or dad, in the sense that they want my attention. I have my own life, my own interests, and for me that works best.

All to often I see people getting married and end up in a midlife crisis (yes, that's what I see people my age already ending up in, since they're already married for 10 years or so). Having more problems/crisis, to deal with? No thanks.

I'm happy with my life and the time I can devote to whatever I deem fun.
 
Geordie
So do I! I'm already looking after my nephew, and he's really a handful. Also, even my Mom and Dad look bothersome. I just want to live the way I want. And indeed, the midlife crisis is not something many of us, and me too, want to live with.

Perhaps being Peter Pans will really make us happier and more satisfied. Because life for others may not be worth living for, unless it's life for others that we care - that would be, well, perhaps, our interests. Like more candies, more music, more art, more good stuff. Just not, uhm, people!

In Fun We Trust would and maybe should be our motto :)
 
Soup
Knowing what you want or don't want is very important (& a sign of maturity!). If you don't want to have a wife, kids & a bunch of pets, then by all means do NOT make those choices just to satisfy parents or conform to some inane societal expectation. Many people do this & feel trapped, resigned to being unhappy & overworked to pay for it all. Where's the joy in living a lifestyle others like but you hate?

As for being Peter Pan & keeping a hold of your boyish ways, why not? The only reservation I have with this is when a person IS competent to work & support himself but is instead reliant upon others. If your Asperger's (& possibly other co-morbid issues) are such that you cannot work, then that is a different story. Ideally, I like it when creative & enterprising people find a way to render their playful tendencies a profitable career. The guy who invented Pokemon did this: his father thought he'd never amount to anything. Who got the last laugh there? Some people design toys, dolls or other playful fun things (like writing or illustrating children's books). Work for them becomes play. Some daycare workers & teachers feel this way too.

The 20s fast turn into the 30s & then many parents are no longer able to support a dependant adult child. Some places offer pitifully small pensions to those who cannot work-even if it's due to a disability!
 
Geordie
I do not agree with the mainstream and the other autism groups in Singapore. I'd gladly lead my own lifestyle, because I feel I can live better than to live with disappointment, and lack of coherence in these groups' actions and aims.

The mainstream wants to fit people with autism, especially high-functioning autistic people, to a job with a specific skill (e.g. IT, engineering and accounting) that many of us do not like, whereas they restrict entry to more interesting jobs, sometimes with lower pay but may interest us, like teaching, away from people with Asperger's Syndrome - the employment for Civil Servants (including teachers) that do require us to disclose our Asperger's, with no provision or indication of hiring of applicants of diagnosed Asperger's disorder.

The autism groups are even worse, at least, in my opinion. Now I know some groups which want to match jobs in the private sector to people with autism, and the jobs are really general jobs that do not interest many Aspies even more, like say, recycling trash into art pieces. I'm more incompetent in these tasks, I'm not really hands on.

Oh, and Singapore has no welfare provisions for the unemployed, and current autism organisations in Singapore even make sure all Aspies, regardless of educational levels, go through the same mindless employment skills programs that lead to mindless jobs that robots can even replace us - at least, the library I worked in the special school I was in was the host of such employment skill programs.

Coupled with my obsession on collecting sneakers and baseball hats... Sigh, looks that I'll have to stop my hobby and acknowledge my life is a meaningless one. I'll have to go through a malted drink and biscuits diet, as this is what the poor does in Singapore...

But nevertheless, looking at the brighter side of things,

I want to be Peter Pan. I want to stay boyish.

But I know very well I have to be, at the very minimum, responsible for my life, and eventually, my family (my parents), at least, under my parents' supervision. In the occasion I am unable to find employment anywhere, or that my possible co-morbid conditions just limit me from working, at least I know I'd tried my best.

So I hope to find something that interests me, and something that others like, and something I really feel that it's not work.

Maybe given my interests in sneakers, after college, I can consider work in sports shoes stores for a while, instead of my parents (which I feel really blessed that they support me, whereas my government doesn't). Given my extroverted character and my love for shoes, maybe I can consider do so if accounting doesn't work out for me, as I also have a few contact references for sports shoes stores' employers.

Other than that, I'll be that boyish looking, boyish feeling but manly within my very own Neverland :D
 

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Geordie
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