This morning, as I was neutrally sipping my tea, a thought occurred to me. I've officially just become one of those 'empty nesters'. Apparently, this engenders some kind of cataclysmic crisis in most NT mothers. You see, my daughter just graduated from her flight attendant training & is now on the flight schedule & officially employed by Air Canada. This morning, with her car packed with stuff, she departed for her new home in Toronto. She'll be sharing a place with another flight attendant from her class.
When your last child moves out, you're allegedly supposed to contemplate the shift in life from being parents of kids to being parents of real grown-ups. I'm supposed to be thinking about the move towards grand-children, retirement & becoming a senior citizen. I should be a mess of tears, sentimentality, memories & other bitter-sweet fare. Yet here I am, sipping a fruity home-made herbal tea, eating apple/caramel cake & hanging out here. They say, "It will hit you later." Uhhh...I doubt it. I don't even have the hardware upon which to run that kind of software!
This is definitely a manifestation of the way Asperger's has made me different. A fellow Aspie at the other extreme of the emotional spectrum might be in an anxiety attack/melt-down state. A NT mom goes through all that stuff I mentioned above. I've been surfing the web reading blogs by new empty nester mothers & most of them go through a whole lot of emotional rigmarole I see no purpose for. Seems almost like a bizarre form of self-torture! All that angst & for what? What will it change? If all that belly-aching could turn back the clock, would it be for the better? Whose interests would forcing your 20 something year old kids to remain under your tutelage serve?
In our case, our youngest will be back for a few days in about 10 days. Flight attendants work a maximum of 70 hours/month. I prefer this to her original idea of becoming a cop: she isn't an emotionally tough person & seeing what cops have to see & deal with on a regular basis would've proven to be too much for her at this stage in her life. Maybe closer to age 30, but this is a decision for a future date: not now. Meanwhile, I'll keep sipping tea, eating cake, hanging out here, doing the wash & the floors & the dogs. Right now, the empty nest means I've inherited the full-time responsibility for a humongous Great Dane who seems to need to go out & poop as often as most people blink.
When your last child moves out, you're allegedly supposed to contemplate the shift in life from being parents of kids to being parents of real grown-ups. I'm supposed to be thinking about the move towards grand-children, retirement & becoming a senior citizen. I should be a mess of tears, sentimentality, memories & other bitter-sweet fare. Yet here I am, sipping a fruity home-made herbal tea, eating apple/caramel cake & hanging out here. They say, "It will hit you later." Uhhh...I doubt it. I don't even have the hardware upon which to run that kind of software!
This is definitely a manifestation of the way Asperger's has made me different. A fellow Aspie at the other extreme of the emotional spectrum might be in an anxiety attack/melt-down state. A NT mom goes through all that stuff I mentioned above. I've been surfing the web reading blogs by new empty nester mothers & most of them go through a whole lot of emotional rigmarole I see no purpose for. Seems almost like a bizarre form of self-torture! All that angst & for what? What will it change? If all that belly-aching could turn back the clock, would it be for the better? Whose interests would forcing your 20 something year old kids to remain under your tutelage serve?
In our case, our youngest will be back for a few days in about 10 days. Flight attendants work a maximum of 70 hours/month. I prefer this to her original idea of becoming a cop: she isn't an emotionally tough person & seeing what cops have to see & deal with on a regular basis would've proven to be too much for her at this stage in her life. Maybe closer to age 30, but this is a decision for a future date: not now. Meanwhile, I'll keep sipping tea, eating cake, hanging out here, doing the wash & the floors & the dogs. Right now, the empty nest means I've inherited the full-time responsibility for a humongous Great Dane who seems to need to go out & poop as often as most people blink.
