It?s been an interesting few years for me. In the past 6 years or so I?ve went from hunches to flat out self-diagnosis and analysis, went in to clinics, talked to professionals and apparently I was spot on with what was going on.
I recall in 2007, talking to a friend and talking about AD(H)D and how I feel this might be one of the many problems. In 2012, after conducting research by professionals, it was indeed the case.
At around 2009 I had my first notion of ?my problems could be autism related?. That?s where I read up on Asperger?s and went on with my life as a self-diagnosed aspie for a while. In 2012, I got it official.
In 2011 I felt something was off and decided to call it depression. In the sessions with therapists in the past it was an up and going process. I felt down, I felt up. This led them to believe, that because of the structural nature of my problem there?s some slight case of bipolar going on, but not anything conclusive. But it?s safe to say that depression is in fact a factor. To make matters more interesting; it?s not neccesarily a chemical problem. My problem persisted more on a social level.
In 2013 I realized my problems in terms of depression had an even deeper cause. I decided to go and label it PTSD. Halfway 2013 I ended up at a therapist for some talks. Today I got my papers in, and in fact, there seems to be an underlying issue of PTSD from events in the past.
But apparently I have a knack for being spot on. Identifying problems, addressing them. I think I deserve a medal for it. In essense it makes it easier for professionals to assess the situation. The most ridiculous downside of this all is, that even with all this knowledge I might have, I still need a referral every ****ing time.
In the past few years I?ve noticed how referrals are a rarity to some. Especially those who don?t want to listen and go on with their own assumptions. People like my doctor who will try to boot you out after 5 minutes and giving you unrealistic advice, partially on a financial level, which apparently is easy for him to say since? the last time I checked doctors made way above minimum wage.
Anyhow; Sometimes it?s good to toot your own horn
Now here?s where things get way more gloomy.
Having this insight of my own ?functioning? and presumably so, an uncanny understanding of some things in the world which are in fact important to my situation, I do worry.
Having knowledge upfront helps you prepare. You know what course of action to take. But in some cases, there is no ?let?s prepare?.
To use an example, which I hear over and over again, and to some extent it?s a government related rant.
Being unemployed, having less money pretty much puts you in a certain financial predicament. People end up in debt, they get support. Support tells them ?even if you want to, you cannot make life work with this little amount of money?. It?s like having 500 in mandatory bills and only getting half on a monthly basis.
Now technically, there?s ways to make money, even if they?re not legal. And some are pretty questionable, but rarely aren?t worth it. I mean, compared to the hourly wage they easily out do it. The risk? meh? at some point people have nothing to lose.
So anyway; there?s just a handful of things which I cannot see functioning, and even specialists in my situation told me ?well? the best course of action is to buy time and hope rules and regulations will straighten out?. Funny how that works?. I could?ve said the same. I know that?s the best course.
As someone on the spectrum, and the stigma of ?being someone who is totally out of his mind and not belonging on earth? (proverbially speaking) I apparently have a really good grasp of my mind, my body, myself as well as how I?m involved with the world at hand.
Guess I?ll give myself a medal
I recall in 2007, talking to a friend and talking about AD(H)D and how I feel this might be one of the many problems. In 2012, after conducting research by professionals, it was indeed the case.
At around 2009 I had my first notion of ?my problems could be autism related?. That?s where I read up on Asperger?s and went on with my life as a self-diagnosed aspie for a while. In 2012, I got it official.
In 2011 I felt something was off and decided to call it depression. In the sessions with therapists in the past it was an up and going process. I felt down, I felt up. This led them to believe, that because of the structural nature of my problem there?s some slight case of bipolar going on, but not anything conclusive. But it?s safe to say that depression is in fact a factor. To make matters more interesting; it?s not neccesarily a chemical problem. My problem persisted more on a social level.
In 2013 I realized my problems in terms of depression had an even deeper cause. I decided to go and label it PTSD. Halfway 2013 I ended up at a therapist for some talks. Today I got my papers in, and in fact, there seems to be an underlying issue of PTSD from events in the past.
But apparently I have a knack for being spot on. Identifying problems, addressing them. I think I deserve a medal for it. In essense it makes it easier for professionals to assess the situation. The most ridiculous downside of this all is, that even with all this knowledge I might have, I still need a referral every ****ing time.
In the past few years I?ve noticed how referrals are a rarity to some. Especially those who don?t want to listen and go on with their own assumptions. People like my doctor who will try to boot you out after 5 minutes and giving you unrealistic advice, partially on a financial level, which apparently is easy for him to say since? the last time I checked doctors made way above minimum wage.
Anyhow; Sometimes it?s good to toot your own horn
Now here?s where things get way more gloomy.
Having this insight of my own ?functioning? and presumably so, an uncanny understanding of some things in the world which are in fact important to my situation, I do worry.
Having knowledge upfront helps you prepare. You know what course of action to take. But in some cases, there is no ?let?s prepare?.
To use an example, which I hear over and over again, and to some extent it?s a government related rant.
Being unemployed, having less money pretty much puts you in a certain financial predicament. People end up in debt, they get support. Support tells them ?even if you want to, you cannot make life work with this little amount of money?. It?s like having 500 in mandatory bills and only getting half on a monthly basis.
Now technically, there?s ways to make money, even if they?re not legal. And some are pretty questionable, but rarely aren?t worth it. I mean, compared to the hourly wage they easily out do it. The risk? meh? at some point people have nothing to lose.
So anyway; there?s just a handful of things which I cannot see functioning, and even specialists in my situation told me ?well? the best course of action is to buy time and hope rules and regulations will straighten out?. Funny how that works?. I could?ve said the same. I know that?s the best course.
As someone on the spectrum, and the stigma of ?being someone who is totally out of his mind and not belonging on earth? (proverbially speaking) I apparently have a really good grasp of my mind, my body, myself as well as how I?m involved with the world at hand.
Guess I?ll give myself a medal
