As if to mock me, the other day I got an advertisement in the mail for Marlo Thomas' new book, "It Ain't Over, Reinventing Your Life and Realizing Your Dreams Anytime at Any Age." This book promises to show you how you can follow your dreams through the example of "50 amazing women who are proving that it is never too late to live out a dream--to get a PhD, travel the world, indulge in a creative impulse, launch a business, fill a void in life with a challenging new experience." Yes, for just $26 you too can read this "empowering message" that speaks to women of all ages.
There was a time when I would have reached for my checkbook and sent my hard-earned money off for these words of wisdom, but I am older and wiser now and not so easily taken in. First of all, I am willing to bet that the whole story is not being told here. It's kind of like that legendary cookie recipe that leaves out just one crucial ingredient--yet you too can make cookies just like Mrs. Fields or whoever it is. The most important question I have to ask is where are these women starting from? What resources were available to them and are they the same resources that are available to all or just a few? I've read enough books of this type to know these questions are not even going to be addressed.
To take an analogy from horse racing, since it is Triple Crown season and right now California Chrome is very much in the news after his Kentucky Derby win, this is the sort of thing that one hears around the racetrack and which keeps people in that game who really have no business being there. California Chrome's story is the stuff of myth. Apparently his owner had a dream he would win the Kentucky Derby with a chestnut colt so he bred an $8000 mare to a $2000 stallion and well--three years later his colt is in the winner's circle at Churchill Downs. Somebody better remind him that that story sounds an awful lot like Black Gold's--and that didn't end so well, even though Black Gold did win the Derby. However, let's put this story in perspective before everyone rushes out to breed no-name mares to no-name stallions and hope to win the Run for the Roses. I don't know the history of California Chrome's sire and dam but from their prices alone I can tell quite a bit about them and where they stand in the racing world. California Chrome is a fluke. An outlier, in Malcolm Gladwell's terms. And if he had not won the Derby you would not be hearing anything more about his owner's dream.
The fact is, the vast majority of racehorses foaled, regardless of breeding, will never once set foot inside a winners circle during their racing careers. They are what are known as "professional maidens". Many go from trainer to trainer and owner to owner, each time going lower down. These are the horses that make up the bulk of the afternoon racing programs. If there are any human interest stories connected with them, you will never hear about them. To the general public they are just there to be bet on. Once in a great while a trainer will find a diamond in the rough among these "cheap claimers" and make a champion out of it. And as the story of California Chrome shows, you can get a Kentucky Derby winner out of humble beginnings. But I would not bet on it. Or recommend that as a way to succeed in horse racing.
So to get back to Ms. Thomas book, she mentions some 50 women who have been able to reinvent their lives and come out on top. Fifty women out of how many? We do not hear and will never hear about the women who tried with all their might to change the odds against them yet failed. We do not hear about the women who never had a chance. Who found barriers at every turn that they were not able to overcome. Or who might have been on the brink of success only to have it snatched away from them by circumstances out of their control. No one writes inspirational books on the also-rans of life. And there are far more also-rans than winners. One hundred forty horses have won the Kentucky Derby, but who can tell me how many horses have not won it since it began in 1874? When we start looking at success in this manner it looks very different indeed.
I'm not saying don't try, just give up. I'm saying don't be suckered by success stories into thinking there is a magical formula or that you just need to have faith no matter what, that anyone can be a winner because everyone is already a winner if they would only apply these principles.
There was a time when I would have reached for my checkbook and sent my hard-earned money off for these words of wisdom, but I am older and wiser now and not so easily taken in. First of all, I am willing to bet that the whole story is not being told here. It's kind of like that legendary cookie recipe that leaves out just one crucial ingredient--yet you too can make cookies just like Mrs. Fields or whoever it is. The most important question I have to ask is where are these women starting from? What resources were available to them and are they the same resources that are available to all or just a few? I've read enough books of this type to know these questions are not even going to be addressed.
To take an analogy from horse racing, since it is Triple Crown season and right now California Chrome is very much in the news after his Kentucky Derby win, this is the sort of thing that one hears around the racetrack and which keeps people in that game who really have no business being there. California Chrome's story is the stuff of myth. Apparently his owner had a dream he would win the Kentucky Derby with a chestnut colt so he bred an $8000 mare to a $2000 stallion and well--three years later his colt is in the winner's circle at Churchill Downs. Somebody better remind him that that story sounds an awful lot like Black Gold's--and that didn't end so well, even though Black Gold did win the Derby. However, let's put this story in perspective before everyone rushes out to breed no-name mares to no-name stallions and hope to win the Run for the Roses. I don't know the history of California Chrome's sire and dam but from their prices alone I can tell quite a bit about them and where they stand in the racing world. California Chrome is a fluke. An outlier, in Malcolm Gladwell's terms. And if he had not won the Derby you would not be hearing anything more about his owner's dream.
The fact is, the vast majority of racehorses foaled, regardless of breeding, will never once set foot inside a winners circle during their racing careers. They are what are known as "professional maidens". Many go from trainer to trainer and owner to owner, each time going lower down. These are the horses that make up the bulk of the afternoon racing programs. If there are any human interest stories connected with them, you will never hear about them. To the general public they are just there to be bet on. Once in a great while a trainer will find a diamond in the rough among these "cheap claimers" and make a champion out of it. And as the story of California Chrome shows, you can get a Kentucky Derby winner out of humble beginnings. But I would not bet on it. Or recommend that as a way to succeed in horse racing.
So to get back to Ms. Thomas book, she mentions some 50 women who have been able to reinvent their lives and come out on top. Fifty women out of how many? We do not hear and will never hear about the women who tried with all their might to change the odds against them yet failed. We do not hear about the women who never had a chance. Who found barriers at every turn that they were not able to overcome. Or who might have been on the brink of success only to have it snatched away from them by circumstances out of their control. No one writes inspirational books on the also-rans of life. And there are far more also-rans than winners. One hundred forty horses have won the Kentucky Derby, but who can tell me how many horses have not won it since it began in 1874? When we start looking at success in this manner it looks very different indeed.
I'm not saying don't try, just give up. I'm saying don't be suckered by success stories into thinking there is a magical formula or that you just need to have faith no matter what, that anyone can be a winner because everyone is already a winner if they would only apply these principles.
