It seems that no matter how hard I try, I always end up hurting people, or at the very least, creeping them out and turning them away.
Usually this happens when I attempt to joke around with them. I don't see the signals that tell me to stop, and they end up exploding on me. I try to sympathize with them and feel bad for hurting them, but it's hard when I just don't understand their anger. So then I just settle with being upset for myself, which I guess is kind of.... self centred. I WANT to understand why they're upset or weirded out or whatever kind of negative emotion it is that they're feeling, but I just can't, so I'm unable to honestly care about their feelings. I find that when I ask someone why exactly they're upset with me, it just makes them angrier like "You should KNOW what you've done!"
I try really hard to match someone else's humor so that I can joke with them in ways that make them comfortable, but it makes me feel so embarassed, like I'm not being funny. So then when they actually get angry at me for whatever it is that I said, It just makes me feel like, wow there is no hope for me is there? I try to joke around, I put myself out there, and then I get shot down because I said something stupid.
I wish it were the other way around but maybe my sense of humor is too obscure for them to understand.
Maybe I shouldn't be trying to match their humor but I find that if I just be myself around certain people, we clash in a number of different awkward ways.
I want to stop trying so hard to be funny in ways I'm not familiar with and with people I'm not familiar with, but I can't stop. I always do this. I try to mirror the other person so that we can get along but I always end up reflecting back at them this awkward, distorted, unsettling version of themselves.
I think the question I've heard the most is
"What the hell is wrong with you?"
Usually this happens when I attempt to joke around with them. I don't see the signals that tell me to stop, and they end up exploding on me. I try to sympathize with them and feel bad for hurting them, but it's hard when I just don't understand their anger. So then I just settle with being upset for myself, which I guess is kind of.... self centred. I WANT to understand why they're upset or weirded out or whatever kind of negative emotion it is that they're feeling, but I just can't, so I'm unable to honestly care about their feelings. I find that when I ask someone why exactly they're upset with me, it just makes them angrier like "You should KNOW what you've done!"
I try really hard to match someone else's humor so that I can joke with them in ways that make them comfortable, but it makes me feel so embarassed, like I'm not being funny. So then when they actually get angry at me for whatever it is that I said, It just makes me feel like, wow there is no hope for me is there? I try to joke around, I put myself out there, and then I get shot down because I said something stupid.
I wish it were the other way around but maybe my sense of humor is too obscure for them to understand.
Maybe I shouldn't be trying to match their humor but I find that if I just be myself around certain people, we clash in a number of different awkward ways.
I want to stop trying so hard to be funny in ways I'm not familiar with and with people I'm not familiar with, but I can't stop. I always do this. I try to mirror the other person so that we can get along but I always end up reflecting back at them this awkward, distorted, unsettling version of themselves.
I think the question I've heard the most is
"What the hell is wrong with you?"
