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36 and still feeling like I did when I was 17.
- Thread starter Markness
- Start date
It has to come from within, others are limited on what we can do. To me ever maze has a route through it just a matter of finding it. The more I learn about you the easier I can see the route.
It sounds like you're expecting a magic fix.
And overlooking the process of gradual, incremental improvements.
Every plan I put together over the years starts with the first step, Even when I changed job. First day at Ford pick up
truck plant I hung a panel on line to see how good their treatment was put a plan together worked the plan took me 18 months, As. you can tell I like to plan most of my plans work got me through life, willing to help you put together plan. Even meet my wife, finding a way to get cheap rent opportunity came my way that's how life works.
truck plant I hung a panel on line to see how good their treatment was put a plan together worked the plan took me 18 months, As. you can tell I like to plan most of my plans work got me through life, willing to help you put together plan. Even meet my wife, finding a way to get cheap rent opportunity came my way that's how life works.
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But why am I criticized for apparently not “trying hard enough” or not “taking charge of my life” if progress is gradual?
A journey of a thousand miles starts with the first step. You need to start taking steps. Do it for YOURSELF, not for anyone else, Markness.
Sounds like those are people who believe in magic fixes that
take just a flick of switch.
Some of my detractors here have that outlook.
They are being unrealistic.
One of them also claims I’ve wasted my life without considering what I’ve had to go through.
Frequently you express that you feel you are wasting your life.
You say this when you are focusing on lacks, and a perceived
failure to succeed to the degree to which you aspire.
Expressing this doesn't ever seem to be a big help to you though.
Continue consulting with your therapist and reading A Guide to Rational Living.
You say this when you are focusing on lacks, and a perceived
failure to succeed to the degree to which you aspire.
Expressing this doesn't ever seem to be a big help to you though.
Continue consulting with your therapist and reading A Guide to Rational Living.
Thinking about a lot about this lately, having many friends who were on the spectrum some single some married
starting to see patterns. A lot of us are loners saw something interesting at work, Before I retired the company had a retirement gathering for another employee, he was another amazing employee production planner. during the speech one thing stood out they mentioned how he really disliked using the phone. my boss pointed to me and said like Ron here. I had a good friend at the plant a woman who was an assistant to the quality engineer she really liked my ideas and the quality engineer quit a few weeks after I started. Either way I found out that this guy had never been married. and then found out my friend had gotten divorced, and just before the retirement that she was dating this guy. She retired before me to join him n retirement, He was 67 she was late 50's. I was oblivious to this. Some women like us Aspies. Us guys are expected to make the first move I have no idea how her and him got together
Both of us liked her me as a friend, him as a romantic partner, looking back we were both autistic He probably has no
idea. I just approached her because I wanted to show her my control plan which I put together first week on job.
She was stunned. When new plant manager started a few moths later he asked to see control plan she asked me what to do as their was no official control plan, After I put it together mine just to show her how it was done, told her to give this one To This day it is control plan nobody said a word. that how we become friends, always worried company would find out. Some women, just like us my wife is one her best friend husband was one he passed last year, Now she found a new boy friend, guess what he is one of us. The trick is you have to find these women, Give me time I will figure it out.
starting to see patterns. A lot of us are loners saw something interesting at work, Before I retired the company had a retirement gathering for another employee, he was another amazing employee production planner. during the speech one thing stood out they mentioned how he really disliked using the phone. my boss pointed to me and said like Ron here. I had a good friend at the plant a woman who was an assistant to the quality engineer she really liked my ideas and the quality engineer quit a few weeks after I started. Either way I found out that this guy had never been married. and then found out my friend had gotten divorced, and just before the retirement that she was dating this guy. She retired before me to join him n retirement, He was 67 she was late 50's. I was oblivious to this. Some women like us Aspies. Us guys are expected to make the first move I have no idea how her and him got together
Both of us liked her me as a friend, him as a romantic partner, looking back we were both autistic He probably has no
idea. I just approached her because I wanted to show her my control plan which I put together first week on job.
She was stunned. When new plant manager started a few moths later he asked to see control plan she asked me what to do as their was no official control plan, After I put it together mine just to show her how it was done, told her to give this one To This day it is control plan nobody said a word. that how we become friends, always worried company would find out. Some women, just like us my wife is one her best friend husband was one he passed last year, Now she found a new boy friend, guess what he is one of us. The trick is you have to find these women, Give me time I will figure it out.
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My wife and her sister prefer Us as does my wife's friend who is very bright, As a group we tend to be brighter, makes us good husband providers My bothers wife met him at work she was a university student going for her masters working part time. He worked in maintenance department fixed her machine, sister meet husband also Aspie. She was geologist in field , he was mining engineer working under her on her crew doing core drilling. See the pattern no dating I found my wife in a rooming house that I was land lord in. What works for NT's does not work for us. Wife's cousin had recently got divorced called a cab she is very talkative he is quiet cab driver started conversing. He found her interesting asked her for date she said yes, Found out recently he is Aspie. Now married, wondered why him and wife's best friend and her husband hung together at barbeque at my place Aspies like fellow Aspies. The pattern is there. You guys are taking the wrong approach be yourself, let them find you. Put yourself in a position where they can find you. This is backward so confusing root cause of finding the ladies. Put yourself in the right circumstance or environment and they will find you. For me it was simply going up stairs and knocking on her door. When she first moved in she was putting together a dresser had no tools I came up to let her know who I was, my partner had rented her the room, I had tools so I helped her. We had rented the room previously to my cousin who had moved out. I thought she might want to see my cousin play my thing was watching bands play on the weekend did she want to join me. I wanted to surprize my cousin seeing me with a woman. Now we are 45 years together 2 kids. I even had a woman at work interested in me was debating whether to ask her after if my wife to be had turned me down. Could not afford expensive dates. My wife's best friend meet her by being a big brother to her younger brother. He worked as a helicopter repair guy lived down street from her came home from fixing copters in northern Ontario, meet her on streets he was older know remembered how bright she was asked her for date I can see a real pattern, he was ten years older than her. I talk to these ladies So they tell me what they see.
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OK guys I have brought you up to the water, Now It's up to you. Put yourself in a target environment. your personality will sell you. That's the pattern I see.
I tend to fear I will run out of time for certain things, especially the stuff that is considered fun for a relationship.
Like going to music shows as well as video game, comic, anime, and manga conventions together. There’s probably more things I haven’t thought of.
I’ve encountered people who lost interest in the things I listed, especially if they were bullied and shamed for it. I actually remember my aunt introducing me to an autistic lady who she said liked anime as well as manga but when I met her and asked her about those things, she said she had lost interest in them besides occasionally playing the Pokémon games.
