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Going to things vs. Spending time with friends

Sherlock77

Sherlock77

Well-Known Member
V.I.P Member
Something is going on lately, in a good/bad way

Last night talking with a friend about her upcoming university graduation and a party she wants to do do a party in a couple months. The first thing out of my mouth was that I'll see, in particular which event/car show might be on at the same time of the undetermined day. That is often a response by me, as I particularly enjoy outdoor events and car shows, at least partially because of the photography I do.

I also have a couple friends who want to do day trips on the highway with me, weekends of course, and my thinking is much the same thing, trying to find a time when I don't really want to miss an event.

I also know it's valuable to connect with people, in particular I connect well with friends and people one on one in smaller groups. So going somewhere with a friend is also valuable in terms of engagement, even if I end up missing an event/car show I really wanted to be at, or was curious about, etc...

It just seems like a constant battle with me, especially as "event season" is kicking into full gear until September

One minor example - there is one very large car show in late September that I've attended for 20 years, haven't missed one year of it, almost wouldn't dream of missing it as it marks the end of car show season and has awesome atmosphere. I'm not sure if I'm afraid (in a sense) of what if I missed going to it, again likely wrong thinking.

Caveat - I am single with no immediate family and have been for years, so my time is essentially my own, I do fully respect friends who have way more life commitments than me
 
Sherlock77 said:
Last night talking with a friend about her upcoming university graduation and a party she wants to do do a party in a couple months
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I understand how you are about car shows, but there are lots of car shows and this is one friend with one graduation. I'd prioritize this. In my case I'm prioritizing my niece's graduation in June over another event I originally had plans for. Only got the one niece and I think it would mean a lot to her for her only uncle to show up.
 
velociraptor said:
I understand how you are about car shows, but there are lots of car shows and this is one friend with one graduation. I'd prioritize this. In my case I'm prioritizing my niece's graduation in June over another event I originally had plans for. Only got the one niece and I think it would mean a lot to her for her only uncle to show up.
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I pretty much know the answer, I just struggle with it many times, it's also related to other summer events too, simply making choices

I don't even know what day she is thinking of :rolleyes:
 
Can you make a friend at the car show to car pool to the next one with? I have one friend, and every year I make a point of dragging him out for some event we can both enjoy. Half the time it is a little local car show.
 
Shevek said:
Can you make a friend at the car show to car pool to the next one with? I have one friend, and every year I make a point of dragging him out for some event we can both enjoy. Half the time it is a little local car show.
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Big city = lots of different events. Classic car related or otherwise.

I do most of my touring around, non-event photography, during the other seasons, not summer.

But when friends want to do things during what I would call my busy season, I balk a little. And when I'm at an event I don't visit much with friends because I tend to be focused on my photography. My best time to visit with friends is when it's not an event. To that point, at a large event I might go "with" someone but I will split up and meet again at the end of it.

If any of this makes sense.
 
Yes, it does make sense.

Been there, done that. Those special events I plan for, often several months in advance. I will move my work schedule around if I need to or take a "personal day" if I need an extra day to travel. My wife may or may not go with me depending upon her schedule. On the other hand, we really do not have an active social calendar, so when we do have a social event, because it is rare, it often takes priority.
 
If there's an event you already plan on going to, say you can't go to friend's event and invite them to the car show. If you have to be alone to enjoy it, let them know this in advance.

I love how you value your social connections. It's good for you to sacrifice a little, but if they are really friends, they need to be able to reciprocate on that in some way too.

For a party that is a big deal and for someone you're close with, just say you can't make it if there is something else you already wanted to go to and send a gift and a card.
 
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