Physical symptoms are keeping me down.

My primary physical symptom that is keeping me down these days is a chronic sense of fatigue. The doctor is planning on getting me into another sleep study to test for sleep apnea again after my septoplasty a year and a half ago. I also need to lose a lot of weight if it really is sleep apnea, and I am now on medication that is supposedly going to help out with that under a doctor's careful supervision.

I feel like sleeping when I am sitting at my desk at work or on my couch at home. I need to get more physical activity in and only I can change that much.

I know what I need to be doing, I just need to stop brainlessly surfing the Internet on my spare time and actually spend some time building myself up. That is on me and nobody else at this point. I find myself spending too much time downloading yaoi and bara manga and not enough time being productive in any way, shape or form. That stuff is probably rotting my brain, since it is essentially nothing but drawn pornography.

Time for me to hit the "reset" button on my life. Delete all the manga, start life over without that. Get back into doing cardio on a daily basis.

If you have two cans, preferably 46 oz. juice can size
and some duct tape, you could pretty easily sneak in
some activity even while you're sitting still.

Taped end to end the cans are a minimal effort way to
exercise your legs while you're sitting in a chair. Roll
the can back and forth under your (shoe-less) feet.

tree said:

If you have two cans, preferably 46 oz. juice can size
and some duct tape, you could pretty easily sneak in
some activity even while you're sitting still.

Taped end to end the cans are a minimal effort way to
exercise your legs while you're sitting in a chair. Roll
the can back and forth under your (shoe-less) feet.

Click to expand...

I need more exercise than that. I have no excuse to not get up and move around. I am physically OK despite the chronic fatigue. I can move around.

Metalhead said:

I need more exercise than that. I have no excuse to not get up and move around. I am physically OK despite the chronic fatigue. I can move around.

Click to expand...

I'm not suggesting this be your only exercise.

I suggest it because it's so easy, virtually passive.

Don't jump to conclusions.

tree said:

I'm not suggesting this be your only exercise.

I suggest it because it's so easy, virtually passive.

Don't jump to conclusions.

Click to expand...

OK, this is autism forums and I did not intend any hostility. Maybe I should walk for a couple hours instead of heading straight home while the weather is sunny.

Are we cool?

Just remember it doesn't have to be an all or nothing routine. And you can certainly start small and build up. It's not a sprint; it's a marathon.

Take it day by day. Doing too much at one time is a recipe for burn out.

That's the key to all of this. Doing it. Talking about it and complaining that you aren't doing it is just as much part of the trap, as the negativity in general.

Does this mean mindlessly jumping into things, with little regard for yourself or others? No.

Does this mean taking small steps towards the greater goal? Yes.

Your goal is to change your life around. How do you intend to do this in small steps? How will you schedule these positive habits?

Use a daily planner. Journaling. Index cards for positive things. Use sticky notes for specific reminders. Limit your use of videogames and video watching. Whether porn or otherwise.

Take it a day at a time. Slowly improve. Don't brute force it.

Metalhead said:

OK, this is autism forums and I did not intend any hostility.

Click to expand...

Understood.

The suggestion was for a super easy
*while you're sitting anyway thing to
do* and...it's a low cost DIY.

Walking is my primary exercise.

@Metalhead

Incorporating small exercises and movement throughout the day in a way that is consistent and long term will add up to way more than hitting the gym hard and burning out.

With respect and gentleness, I’d ask you to consider your previous patterns with exercise and try to learn from what has not worked. You and I both struggle with moderation (one of the keystones of addiction), and we have to be aware of when we hit an all-or-nothing phase. Particularly with exercise, too much too soon is a recipe for injury and burnout. Focusing on how to incorporate consistent activity over the long term seems like your best bet here. That may not feel like enough in the beginning, but it will add up if you keep at it for the next decade.

This is a chance to start small, but make changes that will last the rest of your life. Remember that strengthening and stretching are necessary to support cardio activities and burn a great deal of calories.

https://www.goodrx.com/well-being/movement-exercise/mini-workouts-exercise-tips-recommendations

@Rodafina I have trouble sticking with an exercise routine myself apart from walking. I'll be all eager for whatever results I am currently looking for, but get discouraged after 2 to 4 days.

FayetheAspie said:

@Rodafina I have trouble sticking with an exercise routine myself apart from walking. I'll be all eager for whatever results I am currently looking for, but get discouraged after 2 to 4 days.

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Sounds like there is something about walking that really works for you and that is one of the best exercises we can do.

I can easily understand how tough it is to feel the strike of motivation and want to run at it full force. I have hurt myself too many times to trust that flicker of inspiration now. When I didn't hurt myself, I burnt myself out and never returned to the activity at all. It's very frustrating for sure.

I like to think that I am learning, but I have a long way to go with learning consistency and moderation myself. In a fit of motivation, I tried a mile long run over a month ago and injured both Achilles tendons. Haven't been able to go for a proper walk since and I now wear braces overnight trying to get them to heal.

Just today, I was using the rowing machine and I really wanted to keep going, but I'm new to that exercise and I know that I have to start slowly to build up my strength for that particular machine. It was such a confusing feeling to accept that stopping exercising was the healthiest thing that I could do today.

Xinyta said:

Talking about it and complaining that you aren't doing it is just as much part of the trap, as the negativity in general.

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I just want to second this.

@Metalhead , you seem to get stuck in this loop sometimes, of pointing out that something is off, that you should do X, and then saying that you WILL do X.

But then this repeats.

You have to *actually* do X, whatever X is, and that's the rough part. No amount of just saying it can make you DO it.

And just repeating "this thing is bad" or "I've messed up" also isnt helping. I see that a lot in your status posts in particular.

These are the things I suggest:

1. Dump the media. News and whatnot. I know I harp on about this a lot, but I *guarantee* you, if you are using it a bunch, this is one of the factors. It is designed to addict you, get you to sit still and look at it, agitate you, scare you, make you depressed. All these things feed into exactly the loop, and the habits, that you seem to be stuck in. For the love of all things puppy-shaped, get rid of it.

2. Also do away with problematic accounts you may have. I'm mostly thinking of Reddit here... a lot of people get seriously addicted to that site, or just drained by it.

3. Do you use Youtube? Maybe it's time to cull your subscriptions. Anything that could even conceivably be feeding this, unsubscribe. Install two browser extensions: Unhook, and DeArrow. Keep Unhook on high. I cant even describe just how much of a difference this makes. Speaking as someone who got more than a tad messed up by that accursed site.

4. Here's one that my therapist gave me: set an alarm on your phone for, say, every 30-40 minutes. When it goes off, you pause whatever you might be doing, get up, and do some pacing. For me, with the large basement I'm in, I do about 8-10 laps. Consider the size of your living space and adjust as needed. No need to go overboard, just an easy amount that you can handle without wearing yourself down.

5. DON'T dive into super enormous changes all at once. Don't be like, hey, I'm going to go to the gym every day and lift 5 trucks and then punch a wall down. Start with the small things. Something like the thing @tree mentioned might not sound like much in terms of exercise, but that's part of the point. Besides, as I've found out through physical therapy, some exercises can be a heck of a lot rougher than they look. Like I've got one right now that's just sorta pushing against a wall a bit and turning my head. That sounds like nothing, and if you were to see it, it LOOKS like nothing, but my physical therapist warned me that it was gonna be rough. Real rough. She was right. I've found that most "looks like nothing" exercises aren't what they appear to be.

6. Tell yourself that you CAN improve, never say that you cant do it. I know it can be seriously hard to drop negativity. Really, REALLY hard. But I think you can do it.

7. If you use things like TikTok, it's time to uninstall. They wreck your attention span, and that makes ANY improvements hard to stick with.

8. Drink water.


I apologize if that's a lot, and if I'm repeating stuff I've said before, but I only rant about it because I care. And because I believe you CAN get to a better place. But you gotta take the actions and not undo them.

Just gravitate to those that you love to do. I love jogging, walking, kettle bells, vibration pad, biking, gym machines including stair stepper. Just pick out your favs, and put them on repeat

Metalhead said:

Maybe I should walk for a couple hours instead of heading straight home while the weather is sunny.

Click to expand...

Walk if you can. It's free exercise and you can do it virtually anywhere. Walk hard and fast to raise your heart rate. Wear good, supportive shoes to protect your feet.

I disappointed my boss by taking too much sick time recently. I also have been putting in the bare minimum of effort at my job the last month. My boss is going to have an angry sit down talk with me on Monday. I feel like I should resign now and live off my SSDI alone.

I do not want to die but I do not want to keep on living either.

If you do in fact lose your job maybe it will open the door for something better. If I had not lost my retail job that I could not hardly bear to go to, I would probably still be working there rather than going to school to learn a career that I actually want.

Metalhead said:

I disappointed my boss by taking too much sick time recently. I also have been putting in the bare minimum of effort at my job the last month. My boss is going to have an angry sit down talk with me on Monday. I feel like I should resign now and live off my SSDI alone.

I do not want to die but I do not want to keep on living either.

Click to expand...

You're at a very low point, Metalhead. Please remember that those feelings are transitory. You'll recover and feel better in due course. Hang in there!

@Metalhead
You're in a tough situation where you were left to worry about this situation through the whole weekend. That really sucks. Try the best you can to focus on self-care, self-worth, and all the changes that you want for yourself.

You have support here and people that care about your struggles and want to see you well. Don't forget about your own strength and resilience.

Metalhead said:

I disappointed my boss by taking too much sick time recently. I also have been putting in the bare minimum of effort at my job the last month. My boss is going to have an angry sit down talk with me on Monday. I feel like I should resign now and live off my SSDI alone.

I do not want to die but I do not want to keep on living either.

Click to expand...

Take a deep breath. Speaking as someone who holds a (somewhat) leadership position where I work, it's more likely that the supervisor wants to find out what's going on with you. In all fairness, yes, you do need to get the sick days under control, but if you are wiling to discuss this with them rationally and then make the serious effort in improving and doing the things you need to do to stop the excessive use of sick time then that's where your focus should be (along with the positive self-care, I mean) and I see nothing wrong with that.

Think of if more like coaching the team player, if that makes sense. Then go for a walk today if you can. Get some fresh air and look at the blooming flowers (if it is spring where you live). Try not to dwell on the negative too much.