AGXStarseed
Well-Known Member
(Not written by me. The following article originally came out in 2015. I should also point out that I haven't posted this because my favourite Christmas greeting is "Bah, Humbug", but because I thought it would be interesting to share with you guys).
Christmas can be a time of great joy, but if you’re painfully shy it’s also full of potential problems: as the party season kicks into gear it’s tempting to pull a duvet over your head and stay in bed until the whole thing’s over.
Here are 10 things only painfully shy people understand about Christmas.
1. Everything is awful
It really is.
We like things calm and quiet, but in the weeks running up to Christmas it’s as if the volume of the world has been turned up to eleven.
Our personal space is constantly being invaded in shops, trains, buses and everywhere else by people who stand or sit far too close.
2. It’s really hard to say yes to invitations
Whether it’s a low-key work lunch, a big-budget blowout or a bunch of pals hitting the town, your immediate reaction to any invitation is to imagine it all going horribly wrong in some way that’ll involve people being awful to or horrified by you.
The urge to say ‘sorry, I can’t make it’ is really hard to overcome when you’re imagining tinselly armageddon.
3. It’s better to start parties early
You’ve learnt from experience that turning up to parties fashionably late is the worst possible thing to do when you’re shy: everybody’s already in huddles having great chat and you’re too intimidated to interrupt, so you end up slinking away early.
It’s better to go when the party’s just getting started – and to give yourself enough time to loosen up instead of running for the hills.
4. Sometimes you need to set a deadline
Setting a deadline – ‘If I’m still not having fun by 9pm, I’ll leave’ – can be a good way of striking a deal with yourself: you can relax a bit because you know where the exits are.
More often than not, you are having fun by 9pm – and if you aren’t, at least you gave yourself a chance.
5. Alcohol is dangerous
At a boozy do it’s all too easy to lurk in the shadows while everybody else makes a spectacle of themselves – and if we’re drinking, that means it’s all too easy to drink more quickly than we should.
As Morrissey almost sang, ‘Shyness is nice / But shyness can mean you / end up being sick on your own shoes.’
6. Boring people find you irresistible
There’s something about being painfully shy that acts as a beacon for boring people, who will come and talk in a boring way about boring things for what seems like hours because you’re too shy to cut them short.
It’s worth learning a few polite conversation killers so you can extricate yourself from their clutches.
7. You’ve no idea what to wear
Part of you wants to wear something fabulous, but most of you wants to wear the least conspicuous clothes you possibly can.
Most of you usually wins, because if it doesn’t you’ll spend all night worrying that you’ve worn something stupid, pulling at cuffs, collars or hems of things that don’t quite fit or falling over in shoes you’re not used to wearing.
8. Mistletoe is the devil’s work
The only thing worse than a mistletoe kiss from someone you don’t like is one from someone you do, because you go bright red and forget how to talk.
9. Small talk sucks
Shy people tend to be really, really bad at small talk, and that’s largely because we overthink it: we think we have to come across as really clever or cute or funny, when all we really need to do is show we’re interested in what the other person’s saying.
Nerves can make us talk too much, when what we ought to do is take a few deep breaths and ask a few questions.
10. Shy isn’t the same as anti-social
We want to be social, we really do. We just find it really hard.
Source: 10 things only painfully shy people understand about Christmas | Metro News
Christmas can be a time of great joy, but if you’re painfully shy it’s also full of potential problems: as the party season kicks into gear it’s tempting to pull a duvet over your head and stay in bed until the whole thing’s over.
Here are 10 things only painfully shy people understand about Christmas.
1. Everything is awful
It really is.
We like things calm and quiet, but in the weeks running up to Christmas it’s as if the volume of the world has been turned up to eleven.
Our personal space is constantly being invaded in shops, trains, buses and everywhere else by people who stand or sit far too close.
2. It’s really hard to say yes to invitations
Whether it’s a low-key work lunch, a big-budget blowout or a bunch of pals hitting the town, your immediate reaction to any invitation is to imagine it all going horribly wrong in some way that’ll involve people being awful to or horrified by you.
The urge to say ‘sorry, I can’t make it’ is really hard to overcome when you’re imagining tinselly armageddon.
3. It’s better to start parties early
You’ve learnt from experience that turning up to parties fashionably late is the worst possible thing to do when you’re shy: everybody’s already in huddles having great chat and you’re too intimidated to interrupt, so you end up slinking away early.
It’s better to go when the party’s just getting started – and to give yourself enough time to loosen up instead of running for the hills.
4. Sometimes you need to set a deadline
Setting a deadline – ‘If I’m still not having fun by 9pm, I’ll leave’ – can be a good way of striking a deal with yourself: you can relax a bit because you know where the exits are.
More often than not, you are having fun by 9pm – and if you aren’t, at least you gave yourself a chance.
5. Alcohol is dangerous
At a boozy do it’s all too easy to lurk in the shadows while everybody else makes a spectacle of themselves – and if we’re drinking, that means it’s all too easy to drink more quickly than we should.
As Morrissey almost sang, ‘Shyness is nice / But shyness can mean you / end up being sick on your own shoes.’
6. Boring people find you irresistible
There’s something about being painfully shy that acts as a beacon for boring people, who will come and talk in a boring way about boring things for what seems like hours because you’re too shy to cut them short.
It’s worth learning a few polite conversation killers so you can extricate yourself from their clutches.
7. You’ve no idea what to wear
Part of you wants to wear something fabulous, but most of you wants to wear the least conspicuous clothes you possibly can.
Most of you usually wins, because if it doesn’t you’ll spend all night worrying that you’ve worn something stupid, pulling at cuffs, collars or hems of things that don’t quite fit or falling over in shoes you’re not used to wearing.
8. Mistletoe is the devil’s work
The only thing worse than a mistletoe kiss from someone you don’t like is one from someone you do, because you go bright red and forget how to talk.
9. Small talk sucks
Shy people tend to be really, really bad at small talk, and that’s largely because we overthink it: we think we have to come across as really clever or cute or funny, when all we really need to do is show we’re interested in what the other person’s saying.
Nerves can make us talk too much, when what we ought to do is take a few deep breaths and ask a few questions.
10. Shy isn’t the same as anti-social
We want to be social, we really do. We just find it really hard.
Source: 10 things only painfully shy people understand about Christmas | Metro News
