A conversation with my husband

[Anarkitty]

Me: I joined an autism forum.

Husband: You didn't use your real name, did you?

Me: Of course I did. I also added your work phone and my credit card information in my signature. I thought that would make it easier, so people wouldn't have to ask. Sometimes autistic people have trouble initiating conversation.

[My sarcasm tends to be on the heavy-handed side. Subtlety, I have it not.]

Husband: *sighs*

Me: Why do you think I'm stupid?

Husband: I don't think you're stupid. You're smart 99% of the time. But that other 1%...

That may be true, but I still think he went a tad overboard this time. No, I'm not giving any of you my credit card number. Also, I don't believe than any one of you is a Nigerian prince trying to access his fortune.

 

[Clueless in Canada]

LOL well I recocognise that heavy handed sarcasm style. Is this also perhaps what is called 'mansplaining'? Anyhow, enough about that....did I mention that I am a Nigerian Princess and I need your help?

 

[Anarkitty]

I know, because I am smart, that Nigerian princes are suspect. But princesses are always good and kind because that's what the fairy tales say.

 

[Mia]

It sounds familiar. One day my spouse decided he should instruct me on how to cook something. Having cooked since the age of ten or so, run several restaurants, I wondered what he could possibly suggest. He said I should use more salt, because he likes salt.

 

[Clueless in Canada]

I know, because I am smart, that Nigerian princes are suspect. But princesses are always good and kind because that's what the fairy tales say.

Clearly you are VERY smart. I say that because I am good and kind.

 

[JDShredds]

"Me: Of course I did. I also added your work phone and my credit card information in my signature. I thought that would make it easier, so people wouldn't have to ask. Sometimes autistic people have trouble initiating conversation."

I like your style.

P.S. That "1% of the time" your husband was talking about... he seems to have been having his 1% moment of his own right there.

 

[Fino]

Is it bad to use our real names? Some people do.
Am I stupid for not knowing why that's bad?

You're hilarious, though.

Edit: An intro post was just made with an apparent real name! *freaks out*

 

[Anarkitty]

Is it bad to use our real names? Some people do.
Am I stupid for not knowing why that's bad?

You're hilarious, though.

Edit: An intro post was just made with an apparent real name! *freaks out*

LOL! The real name thing is probably not a big deal for most people, especially if they're not trying to hide anything. But you do have to be careful these days because prospective employers have been known to Google people to see what they can find. And if you irritate the wrong insane person, it's best if they can't find out too much additional info on you just by typing your name into a search bar.

Also, I'm a self-published author of homeschooling books, and while I'm NOT trying to hide anything, it can be a tricky audience. The atheists will boycott you if you look too religious. The conservative Christians will boycott you if you're not THEIR brand of Christian. The polyamorous people probably wouldn't boycott me for only having one husband, but they might send me links to dating sites. I was once called a Fundamentalist and a Feminist in the same week--capital Fs for both of those words. It was an interesting week.

Anyway, I can either post on forums under my real name, or I can be myself. I doubt it would ever be a problem at all--I'm not THAT well-known. Still, better safe than sorry and similar cliches. I like having an income, albeit a small one.

 

[Nitro]

I'm still looking for your credit card number, not to scam you, but to verify your home address

 

[Ken S.]

We aren't supposed to use our real names? How embarrassing for the people stupid enough to........err nevermind.

 

[Tom]

I think your response was humorous but didn't see anything really wrong with his responses. They reflect common anxiety perhaps (and also possibly a retort) but I would not consider it not worthy of calling overboard. The information made him anxious, which is reasonable I think, and he wanted some reassurance on anonymity.

 

[Pats]

We aren't supposed to use our real names? How embarrassing for the people stupid enough to........err nevermind.

Yes, I was gonna say "uh oh".

 

[Pats]

I think your response was humorous but didn't see anything really wrong with his responses. They reflect common anxiety perhaps (and also possibly a retort) but I would not consider it not worthy of calling overboard. The information made him anxious, which is reasonable I think, and he wanted some reassurance on anonymity.

Tom - Are you okay or am I in the Twilight Zone this morning?

 

[Fridgemagnetman]

The thread title "A conversation with my husband."

That was your first mistake.

Speaking as a husband, I recognise the futility of starting a conversation with any one of us.

 

[Pats]

One of my favorite conversations with my ex is this:
On the phone as he's driving home from work with brother in law.
Me: There's a peacock in the neighborhood.
Him: Why do you say that?
Me: I keep hearing it. Maybe the house behind us?
Him: It's not a peacock.
Me: Yes, it is. I recognize the sound.
Him: Do you even know what a peacock is?
Me: Yeeeeesss,
They arrive home and get out of the truck.
Brother in law: Wow, I just heard a peacock.


Or when he wouldn't believe me that a black bear was getting into the trash. It's raccoons. Nope, raccoons were too small to turn over the big trash can. So one night, I hear a big thump outside and shine the flashlight and what do I see but a mamma with her 2 cubs in the trash can. Why do men doubt?

 

[Tom]

Tom - Are you okay or am I in the Twilight Zone this morning?

Honestly not sure what you mean. But I have been binge watching The Twilight Zone the last few nights. Has something happened to me?

 

[Pats]

Honestly not sure what you mean. But I have been binge watching The Twilight Zone the last few nights. Has something happened to me?

That's funny that you've been watching Twilight Zone - I haven't been. lol But I usually look forward to reading your witty remarks while everyone else is more serious (usually) and suddenly all the remarks have been funny and yours is the only one that's been more serious. Do do do do

 

[Tom]

That's funny that you've been watching Twilight Zone - I haven't been. lol But I usually look forward to reading your witty remarks while everyone else is more serious (usually) and suddenly all the remarks have been funny and yours is the only one that's been more serious. Do do do do

Ah so. I thought that might be it but wasn't sure. Funny that one episode last night was about Doppelgangers. As the story went when two parallel universes accidently connect your double might cross over and have to eliminate you so as to take your place. Maybe I'm the doppelganger... do do do do.

 

[Ken S.]

My favorite conversation with my wife was in a grocery store in the produce section. There was a black guy there misting the vegetables (Tells you how long ago this was) and we were standing right in front of the potatoes when I abruptly got her attention and asked her "What is the name of that state where potatoes come from?" To which she replied "Idaho." I smiled and said "And I da pimp." The guy misting the vegetables an I were laughing so hard we were both beet red while my wife proceeded to pound on my shoulder.

 

[Anarkitty]

The information made him anxious, which is reasonable I think, and he wanted some reassurance on anonymity.

I get that. He's always been very protective towards me--as I've been reading and mentally reviewing my personal history, I'm starting to understand that perhaps he's had reason.

On the other hand, hear me out. We have been online together since pre-internet days, in the BBS community where everyone used handles. So he's literally been reminding me of not using my (ahem) real, FULL name for almost 30 years. I got the message. I remember!

Also, I literally just had the-importance-of-internet-anonymity conversation with my 18 year old. He rolled his eyes and said, "I know, Mom."