A feeling never felt before, whilst visiting my dr today

[Suzanne]

Other than the usual reason for visiting, my husband ( on behalf of me) wanted to ask how his wife can get: not fit for work, in order to be registered as disabled.

How is this for you? Acting, but not acting, so to speak. A lot of traits came out, hoping to show him to take me serious, yet, despite that deliberation, I was actually not faking. So strange. If felt so natural, to be stimming openly.

I have to see a psychiatrist in order for that therapist to give a document that I am unable to work ( former psychiatrist said that no employer would want to hire me, due to not be able to speak fluent French; a non driver and not being able to work in a team. I do add: that I have tried to work in this country; but it ended quickly and have cried often, when I thought I might have a chance, only to have it dashed.

I do come across as "normal" a lot of time; but when stressed or anxious, or disorganised in my brain, suddenly those aspie traits come spilling forth, much to my husband's amusement and a lady I study the bible with ( me being the teacher) finds me endearing, because her second daughter has ADHD and some of that traits merge with my traits.

 

[Outdated]

Hi Suzanne,

It all depends on the rules in whatever country you are living in. Where I live the welfare systems are actually pretty good but navigating them in order to get on the pension was difficult. Until I learned a trick.

I registered with an employment service that specialises in employment for disabled people, and I didn't beat around the bush. I told them straight up that I didn't want to work ever again and that I wanted to go on the pension. These people knew all the ins and outs of the system and after that getting the pension was just a formality.

I hope that helps you in your country.

Cheers.

 

[AutistAcolyte]

I've had a similar interesting experience with stimming since I discovered I am autistic. There's probably some interesting "chicken and egg" psycho-analysis that could be done here, but now that I'm aware of stimming behavior I have started consciously allowing myself to do it (hand shaking, rocking, humming, etc.) more openly, and they are very comforting!

I also have a similar odd internal feeling, it feels like I'm asking myself, "Am I 'performing autism,' or are these behaviors that I've discovered helping me?"

I'd love to hear from others who got late-diagnosis about their experience of traditionally autistic behaviors!

 

[SusanLR]

I was late diagnosed in my 50's.
As I learned more about autism and the traditional behaviors you speak of,
I saw myself.
I had grown up with the traits without knowing about it.
Just to mention a few that psychiatrists cited:

Not making eye contact from baby on through life.
Not interacting with other children.
No friends.
Sensitivity problems. Too much noise, too much activity, too many people around.
Didn't care for school parties, groups, or socializing.
Clothes sensitivity. Food textures.
Did develop normal puberty desires.
Never wanted to leave home. No want for living with another and didn't want kids.
Twenty- three before I went on a date. Found I was Asexual.
Didn't bond with anyone except parents. Happier with nature and animals.
Couldn't live without a rocking chair. My biggest stim.
I sleepwalked around age 6 and was always found rocking in my chair.

Many more that was called typical, but no one knew anything about it back then.
I was just called anxious and had panic attacks and OCD.

Things were better by college age, and I had an interest in medical arts.
I became a pharmacist.

I was put on disability from herniations of my back before there was any
ideas of autism. I know you can get disability for it though.
Having a good doctor to help you is the easiest.

 

[GypsyMoth]

You must really trust your therapist.

Sounds like the experience gave you encouragement. I hope it works out for you. It sounds like you've had a lot of struggles so maybe this will be like turning over a new leaf.

I don't think I could do that--stim openly, that is.

 

[Outdated]

Most of my stimming isn't seen as all that unusual. I pace a lot, and when people complain I use my bad back as an excuse, I can't sit in upright chairs without pain. Stroking and playing with my beard is something most people don't even really notice. And if I'm busy doing something most people see it as quite normal that I would hum and sing to myself.

 

[GypsyMoth]

...is something most people don't even really notice.

Funny thing. People who fidgeted used to annoy me--it's just that I find other people's fidgeting highly distracting. But now that I know what to look for, and have really started to notice it in myself, now only certain fidgets stand out and they're no longer annoying--they're informative. Mostly it's those that are longer in duration or repeated frequently or more intensely. It's not the usual stuff either, but actions unique to the person doing it. It's kind of endearing because now I know that if that person just might be on the spectrum, for them to do that around me is a sign of confidence or trust. So I guess my point here is, if anyone notices your stimming but says nothing, they probably don't connect it with what it is & just think it's normal.