A talk about expectations for dating.

[Wolfnox]

So i just wanted to put this out there and see what comes up. I live with my parents by choice and nesscity. Fixed income my parents have full control over. Im comfortable with that arrangement for now. I have no drivers liscense or job expectations. No friends and no social skills. My questions are these. What do i have to offer a woman? And is it really fair to her to put up with my autism and living concerns?

 

[Pats]

Things have changed so much I wouldn't know the requisites for dating anymore.

 

[Tom]

It sounds like you link dating with long term-relationship/marriage. Its not. Dating is an earlier phase of just getting to know people. Usually it starts and ends rather quickly. Only once in a while it takes root and progress's to something more lasting.

 

[Bolletje]

Make sure you have things going for you. Interesting hobbies, knowledge, conversation skills, physical fitness. Join a club or two to grow as a person and make some friends in the process. You won’t be a burden if you’ve got something to offer.

 

[Tom]

Oh, and as far as what you have to offer, some things are universal. That is anyone can do it. One of my favorites is uber high quality, shockingly expensive, too good for mere mortal men, dark chocolates.

 

[Wolfnox]

Thanks. Im just looking for advice and wisdom.

 

[Fino]

It's hard to imagine someone living at home with no job, drivers license, friends, or social skills having any success with women, unless you found someone similar to you, or if you're insanely hot.

But maybe I'm just being pessimistic, I don't know, I've never known someone with all of these things so it's hard to say.

 

[Judge]

I've always sidestepped the entire institution of dating in favor of making friends. And that on rare occasion, a friendship might evolve into something more.

Far less stressful no matter what your living conditions may be.

 

[tducey]

Find a hobby would be my advice. Maybe through said hobby you could meet a potential dating partner, good luck.

 

[paloftoon]

Your honesty and curiosity/concerns are quite valid. Obtaining any of those things you describe are a process and not overnight. Finding a hobby/hobbies are probably the easiest to accomplish for most people. Especially if you're looking for something deeper, you want to be able to say you are at least one or some of the things you aren't- able to drive and/or lives on own, has a job, etc. In a decent friendship, you won't ended up being too much of a burden to someone else and able to contribute to their social well-being in some way.

 

[the_tortoise]

My questions are these. What do i have to offer a woman? And is it really fair to her to put up with my autism and living concerns?

I don't know what you have to offer because I don't know you; And because the things that are valued by one person might not be valued by another.

However, thinking generally.....

You could offer enjoyable companionship, practical and/or emotional support of whatever kinds your are able to provide, kindness, interesting discussion, you could have a good sense of humor, etc.

There is a lot more to a person's value than what they do for income or whether or not they can drive a car.