Advice for making friends and social situations

[AliceHakurei]

I'm sure there are people who can relate, but I've been having a lot of trouble with social situations and making friends. Besides friends my parents got for me, I didn't make a single friend until college. The closest I got was acquaintances. I just had trouble relating to people. Maybe it's because I'm transsexual and wanted to be a girl, but had to live in a different social role I had no interest in, but I think there's more to it than that. I'd say I have social anxiety and awkwardness that is separate from the transsexual part (which is equally important). I'm curious - how do people go about making friends? How do people talk to new people? And how do people get through social situations while not coming off as pretentious or awkward?

Thanks

 

[oscar2012]

You have started yourself by being on this forum hi and welcome

 

[Sparticus]

Grab your town's newspaper, read about events taking place, choose a few & go. Good luck!

 

[Drake Marino]

I can relate to you. Making acquaintances is a piece of cake for me, but making friends is so hard. Like, I have people to talk to in most of my classes, but very very few people I can have have sleepovers with, go hang out at the mall with, etc. How you talk to new people depends entirely on the situation. Usually what happens is two people are talking about something, someone else who does not know them has something to contribute to the topic, they get in the conversation and boom, those two people are no longer strangers to them. Another way of talking to someone new is making a remark on an item they're wearing. For example, one time this dude at school was wearing a shirt that said "otaku" on it, so I said to him "I see you like anime". And that right there started a small conversation. To go from an acquaintance to a friend to someone, you have to talk to them on a regular basis, and eventually invite them to do stuff with you, such as hang out at the mall, or invite them to your house. A good start would be exchanging phone numbers. This is the part where I, and many people run into a wall. There's a risk of rejection there, as some people simply may not want to. I usually wait until they start engaging me first, As for how people get though social situations without coming off as pretentious or awkward, I'm still trying to figure that out myself.

 

[Kadevilbig]

My college has a club called saga sexuality and gender alliance it's an LBGTQ club on campus your college might have a similar club or group and that's a good place to fond people who can relate. I went there when I was questioning my sexuality and everyone was very nice.

Just be yourself I'm definitely not your stereotypical sports testosterone type of guy and It was hard to find people with similar Interest at first but I kept at it and found a awesome girl named Anna and we get along great. Just don't give up be yourself you don't have to tell people right off the bat your transgendered and there's people out there that you will get along with better than others and some people will be mean or standoffish about it but if there that way there not wroth your time.