After some advice for my son

[Scruff]

Hi, my eldest son, Jack, who is 16, he has not been diagnosed as he did not wish to continue with the testing. He is vey smart and is at an achedemic public school, the one subject that he really struggles with is English, he writes in what i consider a very concise and corect way, but struggles with exams, he says the questions are too difficult to understand. We are in Australia and no matter how well you do in your other subjects, if you do not pass English then there is no great benefit in passing the others as far as uni goes. As you can see by this post my English is not going to get him over the line, but i was wondering if anyone out there who has experianced the same problem and has any useful advice or links.
I am hoping Jack will join and ask some questions himself, he is my pride and joy and I just want to make things a little easier for him, he rarley asks questions of his tutors and his economics teacher who really looks out for Jack put it in a nutshell when she said Jack wants to be the invisible man. Thanks for your time
Kind regards Steve

 

[Ehmagerd]

We are in Australia and no matter how well you do in your other subjects, if you do not pass English then there is no great benefit in passing the others as far as uni goes.

What does he want to do? None of the math/science/engineering subjects have English as a per-requisite. I mean, there are dozens of courses that don't require it.

 

[Christy]

Hi Scruff,

I'm an Aussie aspie. At the time I went through high school I was undiagnosed. While I did not have the same issues interpreting the test questions, I very much relate to wanting to be invisible.

Have you tried talking to the English teacher? I appreciate your son would not want attention drawn to himself, and that he is not officially diagnosed, but if his English teacher is anything like the teachers I know, they would want to help a bright student who is trying. Maybe they can assist by wording the questions differently, or allowing him to sit the test at a different time where he can have someone discuss the question with him to ensure he understands before he answers them.

I know this will be difficult for him because it will draw attention to him, but hopefully he understands that his future is much more important than what his current peers think. Perhaps he can focus on that and realise it won't matter next year when he gets into the uni course he wants.

 

[Scruff]

Hi, as far as i know you have to pass English for the uni courses, sounds silly to me also. He is not sure of what he wants to do, but is leaning towards economics

 

[Scruff]

Thanks Christy
Yes i have spoken to her a number of times, he also does an after school course.What you say about wording the questions differantly is somthing I will ask about, thnks for your answer

 

[MoCoffee]

I don't know if this will help, but I have two nephews who really struggled with English, and their schools here in Canada arranged for them to be asked the questions verbally rather than reading them.

 

[Ereth]

Surely your son's school has programs to assist children in scenarios like this. What, specifically, makes test questions difficult for Jack? Answering this question, if you don't know the answer already, should help you figure out the next step.

I was not diagnosed until I was a few years out of my teens, but I understand why Jack wants to stay "invisible." I think, however, that if he builds a support network, he'll come to understand that the people who really matter won't see him as "different" or deficient in any way.

Best wishes to you and your family.

 

[Scruff]

I don't know if this will help, but I have two nephews who really struggled with English, and their schools here in Canada arranged for them to be asked the questions verbally rather than reading them.

Thanks for that, but it is more the way the questions are geared and understanding exactly the mannor which they need to be answered ,I am trying to get Jack to explain it himself. As I have said I am no master of the English, although I am an Englishman, I find the questions daunting.
Thanks

 

[Scruff]

Surely your son's school has programs to assist children in scenarios like this. What, specifically, makes test questions difficult for Jack? Answering this question, if you don't know the answer already, should help you figure out the next step.

I was not diagnosed until I was a few years out of my teens, but I understand why Jack wants to stay "invisible." I think, however, that if he builds a support network, he'll come to understand that the people who really matter won't see him as "different" or deficient in any way.

Best wishes to you and your family.

Thanks for the reply
The school were trying to get Jack diagnosed so they could get funding to assist him, and get him extra time in exams etc. but Jack was not comfortable with it although we were 80% through the various specialist appointments. We are from the country and Jack passed some academic test to get a scohlarship in the city , and so we only see him alternate weekends and talk daily on the phone, it has done him a lot of good, he has a small group of solid freinds
The downside though is not being able to help more with his studies.
Kind Regards
Steve

 

[Scruff]

Hello again
I have asked my son to put into words the particular problems he has with his English at school this is what he wrote
"Sorry, I don't really know what to write:
I can?t understand most exam questions properly, and can?t write a full length essay on something I don?t understand. Even when it is something I understand, I can?t gather enough evidence or points to write an intelligible essay from. But overall, I am worst at image analysis essays, they are almost impossible for me, and I fail all of them. Also I am terrible at creative writing, and interpreting written texts."
I suppose what I am asking is weather this is part of a Aspergers issue or a separate problem that is not related. His confidence in his own ability is very low and I just don't know how to lift it, I am sure self belief has a big part in it, but he always tells me i don't understand , and i guess he is right, but I really would love to understand. Does anyone relate to what he is saying.
Thanks

 

[Christian T]

I'm also an Aussie aspie and I've just finished high school. I agree that mainstream English is not for every student, so I would suggest that Jack do English Language instead - if his school offers it. There is no image analysis, no creative writing, no literary interpretation of written texts and the essay questions are much more straightforward. People who enjoy mathematics are often more suited to English Language as its more scientific, more technical and more objective than Literature or mainstream English.

He does not have to do mainstream English - there are three options, and one of them is English Language.

In terms of being aspie, I too resisted a lot against my parents towards the end of my testing. I felt like they were smothering me and trying to change me because they could not handle me being different. However, I was tested when I was primary school, not high school. I think if you do your best to give him an explanation of what Asperger's is, maybe from a professional source, he might be convinced to continue.

I am also very introverted, like Jack. I am very reluctant to share my thoughts and feelings on my own initiative, even if I have a problem. It's a tough one. Maybe you could remind him that he doesn't always have to solve problems entirely by himself.

That's my advice, anyway. And remember that English Language is an option that saves many students, so I urge you to look into it.

 

[Scruff]

That's my advice, anyway. And remember that English Language is an option that saves many students, so I urge you to look into it.[/QUOTE]

Thanks Christian, I told Jack this, he says there is not this option at the school, I will speak to the school again and see if there are any other options,thanks for taking the time to help.

 

[Ehmagerd]

Hi, as far as i know you have to pass English for the uni courses, sounds silly to me also. He is not sure of what he wants to do, but is leaning towards economics

False. Look at the course requirements.

 

[MoCoffee]

I'm wondering if Jack might be able to get his English credit through distance education or through a correspondence course. This would let him work at his own pace and take away some of the pressure he's feeling. Jack might also benefit from becoming part of aspiescentral where we could give him some support and encouragement. Hang in there. I'm a mother too, and I think you're amazing for trying so hard to find a solution when the school system doesn't seem inclined to help. I wish you and Jack all the best.

 

[Christy]

False. Look at the course requirements.

Hi Ehmagerd, just be aware that different countries have different university entrance requirements. I'm not sure where you're located, but where I am English is a prerequisite for pretty much everything.

 

[Christy]

Hello again
I have asked my son to put into words the particular problems he has with his English at school this is what he wrote
"Sorry, I don't really know what to write:
I can’t understand most exam questions properly, and can’t write a full length essay on something I don’t understand. Even when it is something I understand, I can’t gather enough evidence or points to write an intelligible essay from. But overall, I am worst at image analysis essays, they are almost impossible for me, and I fail all of them. Also I am terrible at creative writing, and interpreting written texts."
I suppose what I am asking is weather this is part of a Aspergers issue or a separate problem that is not related. His confidence in his own ability is very low and I just don't know how to lift it, I am sure self belief has a big part in it, but he always tells me i don't understand , and i guess he is right, but I really would love to understand. Does anyone relate to what he is saying.
Thanks

I'm aware the teaching methods in Australia have been changing over the years (my sisters are teachers and complain about this). I'm wondering if the move away from structured learning has made it even more difficult for your son. I identify with the issues he is having, but I never had to do anything like an image analysis essay (I had to google it).

I'm not sure I have any advice sorry, but whether it's an aspie issue or not, I certainly do identify with it. My creative side is very limited, but a lot of the aspies here are incredibly gifted with their creativity. It is a spectrum though.

It doesn't sound like he struggles with how to write an essay, because I did until someone gave me a structured way to approach it. It's more the content, and I don't know how to help with that. But perhaps you could ensure this is not adding to the issue?

 

[Ehmagerd]

Hi Ehmagerd, just be aware that different countries have different university entrance requirements.

Yeah... I'm same as scruff...
Maybe it's by state. I've looked at the South Australian course books and English is not a pre-requisite for the sciences/math/engineering. It might say 'you must have completed this subject plus 2 of these 5'... Something like that. English is nearly always either not required, it's only put as an option as one of the 5, or however many they give to choose from. Then there are many other subjects not requiring English, or again, only having it as an optional.

Many people from my highschool who are now at university did not do english in year 12. Year 11 only a very basic english is required in order to receive the completion certificate (SACE, in my state). Is it the yr 11 English he is struggling with? Which English is he taking? IIRC there are two, one much harder than the other.

You should look at the course book (for the university he's considering, most are online too btw) and actually know for sure what the requirements are. Or you can force him to do this for what may be no reason.