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Anxiety, Bad Memories, and Phobia.

Caelix3

Caelix3

Well-Known Member
Today I was at Toys R Us, as I still like dolls and stuff animals. Even though I'm 18. Might be because of my Autism or I'm young at heart. Anyways after getting a doll from the doll section, I went to the electronics section. As I was waiting for my mom to ask the employee to get me a game from the case. Pokemon Moon. I saw HER, someone I thought I would never see again. My ex best friend, from elementary and middle school. This "best friend" used to come over to my house and force me to find porn and watch it with her. Or she would tell all my secrets to everyone at school. She would laugh while watching the porn. This was in elementary school, 5th grade. Then she would say people were making fun and talking about me. She would also rip or break my stuff. But I didn't want to stop being friends with her because then I would lose my other friend. Not sure if that is considered emotional abuse or bullying. But as soon as I saw her in the store. I walked somewhere else and hid. I felt like a little kid again and all the memories came back to me.

I also went to another store and found a dog stuffed animal door stopper. It felt weighted and nice so I decided to get it for a stuffed weighted animal.

But at least I got some cool stuff from Toys R Us and another store, that's a plus. (Gonna put pictures of the items)

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I also have a phobia of men. I don't know why. I've always been scared of most of them. Fiction ones are awesome. Just the real ones freak me out. I've never been abused by one. So I don't know why, I have this phobia.
 
I was bullied at school too, so I know what you mean. I'm okay now; some of my former bullies turned up at a school reunion some years ago and apologised, but we were a fair bit older than you are, even then, so time had passed; I don't know how I'd have felt if I'd bumped into one when I was your age.
If it happened now, at least I could explain some of my odd behaviour, which may have contributed to me being bullied, which I couldn't before.
Glad you got some nice things out of your trip.
 
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