Anxiety

[updownrightleft]

To counter anxiety I fixate on a visible object to describe it to myself repetitively. That takes the brain power out, and I have nothing else to worry about until I realizes how real is the situation. At that point my mind blanks, but then quickly I fixate again. If I do this before an event involving people interactions, that calms me to forget all about the subtleties of body and facial expressions. These expression, I have no natural logic circuit to interpret them with. They enter my mind and there they reside in volatility until I rationalize them. They put emotion in me, but I cannot tell what they mean. To worsen it I feel I must acknowledge these expressions through ones of my own. If I take a deep breath to calm myself, the experience becomes more pleasant. But then I realize that my conversational partner might notice my deep breath, then I wonder what will reply in his mind. I have got the jitters now. And then my face gets all red and my veins pops visibly towards my skin surface, like water pipes in a wall exploding to thousand pieces. Until I break out the word, did you notice my deep breath? What? The moment is awkward in silence and my dialouge exchanger gazes upon me. Whilst kept being fed emotive impulses I finally crumble to dust on the floor.

My question is, is this normal?

 

[The Phantom]

To counter anxiety I fixate on a visible object to describe it to myself repetitively. That takes the brain power out, and I have nothing else to worry about until I realizes how real is the situation. At that point my mind blanks, but then quickly I fixate again. If I do this before an event involving people interactions, that calms me to forget all about the subtleties of body and facial expressions. These expression, I have no natural logic circuit to interpret them with. They enter my mind and there they reside in volatility until I rationalize them. They put emotion in me, but I cannot tell what they mean. To worsen it I feel I must acknowledge these expressions through ones of my own. If I take a deep breath to calm myself, the experience becomes more pleasant. But then I realize that my conversational partner might notice my deep breath, then I wonder what will reply in his mind. I have got the jitters now. And then my face gets all red and my veins pops visibly towards my skin surface, like water pipes in a wall exploding to thousand pieces. Until I break out the word, did you notice my deep breath? What? The moment is awkward in silence and my dialouge exchanger gazes upon me. Whilst kept being fed emotive impulses I finally crumble to dust on the floor.

My question is, is this normal?

Well, I've never heard of anyone who does it, however it seems perfectly normal at the same time if that makes sense. I think focusing on a certain thought or object to calm oneself makes sense. Sometime in school when my teacher goes through everyone's work in front of the class and clicks on everything individually to see who did their homework I get EXTREMELY stressed even if the embarrassment only lasts a few seconds, and I plug my ears, put my head on my desk and hum to block out everything else and focus on 'happy thoughts' lol. But my classmates go like 'Ohhhhhhhhh' when you don't do your homework and it makes me really mad for some reason (almost of a physical level, I start to clench up and everything) and then I yell at them so I get in trouble LOL. I know this is a different thing, but this is just to let you know that your coping mechanism is a normal thing.

 

[asd8513]

I stim when i get anxious. I subtly pinch arm or my wrist

 

[Progster]

I often play a song that I like through my mind to relieve anxiety.

 

[updownrightleft]

Thank you