Any Non-monogamous aspies?

[Lady Lucifer]

I've noticed asexual (the romantic and sexually repulsed type) is very common amongst ASD. But what about non monogamy? Just out of curiosity.

How did you know that you wanted to be non-monogamous? Or was that a choice you made later in life? Are all your partners aspies or are they a mix? How do you communicate with your partners?

I knew I was nonmonogamous at an early age of thirteen. I didn't know there was a word for it. But I always questioned how come I couldn't have two, three, or six partners without it being considered "cheating?" What if I could be "shared" amongst multiple partners, consensually?

That being said, while I define myself as a polaymorous person, I never actually had an actual multipartner relationship. I've only had three relationships (all separately and at different points in my life) but I'm starting to notice how common polyamory is in the modern age. But how common is it with aspies?

 

[SusanLR]

What if I could be "shared" amongst multiple partners, consensually?

You can. Consensually is the key word.
If it is agreed upon by all involved I wouldn't call it cheating.
If you try to convince a partner they are the only one you care for having a relationship with
but go ahead and have others, then it's cheating because you've lied to someone to get what you
want from them.

 

[NothingToSeeHere]

I'm poly, mainly because I'm asexual and I don't think that my partners should go without sex just because I'm not into it. I'm also kinky, and it's difficult to find a partner who has all the same interests, having multiple partners solves the problem. So long as it's all completely consensual and everyone maintains good communication it works really well.

 

[aspieoutlaw89]

I've noticed asexual (the romantic and sexually repulsed type) is very common amongst ASD. But what about non monogamy? Just out of curiosity.

How did you know that you wanted to be non-monogamous? Or was that a choice you made later in life? Are all your partners aspies or are they a mix? How do you communicate with your partners?

I knew I was nonmonogamous at an early age of thirteen. I didn't know there was a word for it. But I always questioned how come I couldn't have two, three, or six partners without it being considered "cheating?" What if I could be "shared" amongst multiple partners, consensually?

That being said, while I define myself as a polaymorous person, I never actually had an actual multipartner relationship. I've only had three relationships (all separately and at different points in my life) but I'm starting to notice how common polyamory is in the modern age. But how common is it with aspies?

i'm non-monogamous.i've never had multiple partners before.for now (until i find someone),my potential monogamous partners are giant teddy bears (i have not owned one yet,but i'm getting there.)

 

[Tom]

Do you mean Polygamists, like some Aspie Mormons are ?

 

[aspieoutlaw89]

Do you mean Polygamists, like some Aspie Mormons are ?

no,i've never seen any aspie mormons...ever.

 

[NothingToSeeHere]

Do you mean Polygamists, like some Aspie Mormons are ?

Polygamy is one type on non-monogamous relationship, but is generally not what people are talking about when mentioning poly relationships these days. When we talk about non-monogamy most are generally referring to polyamory such as open relationships, swinging, and relationship anarchy, which do not have religious or patriarchal connotations, and emphasise open communication, ethics, and equality.

 

[Nervous Rex]

Do you mean Polygamists, like some Aspie Mormons are ?

That's a truly horrific thought. It's hard enough negotiating a healthy social scene. I can't imagine an Aspie in a Warren Jeffs-style compound.

 

[Bolletje]

I’ve had some non-monogamous partnerships. My current relationship started out non-monogamous, but became monogamous.
The trick to a successful non-monogamous relationship, in my opinion, is to have very clearly defined rules about what is and isn’t allowed, and how to handle (non-)disclosure. The reason my current relationship didn’t work as non-monogamous was that my boyfriend kept changing the rules unilaterally without informing me.

 

[Lady Lucifer]

Polygamy is one type on non-monogamous relationship, but is generally not what people are talking about when mentioning poly relationships these days. When we talk about non-monogamy most are generally referring to polyamory such as open relationships, swinging, and relationship anarchy, which do not have religious or patriarchal connotations, and emphasise open communication, ethics, and equality.

Not only that Polygamy is a religious form of (sometimes consentual) non monogamy. The correct definition is a man who has multiple wives and those wives are only married to that one husband. (I'm not sure if the women are married to each other)

@Tom non-monogamy is umbrella term. It can mean polygamy or polyandry (a woman with multiple husbands), polyandry (gender various circles), triads, quads, and even swingers.

This forum amazes me everyday. I'm surprised to where this conversation went.