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anyone with grown kids?
- Thread starter Pats
- Start date
My 2 boys are 28 and 30 years old. One mechanical engineer and married, no kids. The other, a university professor, biomedical engineering and CRISPR genetics, single, no kids.
My wife and I don't deal with them at all.
They are quite independent, very busy, and are several hundred miles away from us. We talk to each other every month or so, see each other a few times a year.
My wife and I don't deal with them at all.
They are quite independent, very busy, and are several hundred miles away from us. We talk to each other every month or so, see each other a few times a year.We have three grown kids. I guess we did something right, probably by accident and not by design, when they were growing up. All have good jobs, two have children of their own, and my main complaint (which I'd never say to them) is that their daddy and I do not want to babysit our grandchildren every week. Just because we're retired and at home all the time, doesn't mean that we are bored, unhappy, or lonely and therefore in need of having grandchildren here all the time.
I know grandparents are supposed to dote on their grandchildren and want to spend every minute with them, but we don't feel that way. I guess we're defective grandparents. Part of how I feel comes from the fact that we rarely had babysitters for our children so I think that if I did it alone, then you should be doing it alone, too, most of the time.
I know grandparents are supposed to dote on their grandchildren and want to spend every minute with them, but we don't feel that way. I guess we're defective grandparents. Part of how I feel comes from the fact that we rarely had babysitters for our children so I think that if I did it alone, then you should be doing it alone, too, most of the time.
Yes, we managed to raise two units of humanity. 
Neither has reproduced yet and I think their both being ND has been a factor. Overall our relationships have been very good, though there are always going to be bumpy patches which I see as natural for most people. As parents you never really lose your concern and anxiety over their well being so in a way parenting evolves but never ends. I don't really miss being a grandparent but would not mind if it happened. Practically the day the kids started moving out on their own we replaced them with Chihuahuas and that has softened the empty nest syndrome.
Neither has reproduced yet and I think their both being ND has been a factor. Overall our relationships have been very good, though there are always going to be bumpy patches which I see as natural for most people. As parents you never really lose your concern and anxiety over their well being so in a way parenting evolves but never ends. I don't really miss being a grandparent but would not mind if it happened. Practically the day the kids started moving out on their own we replaced them with Chihuahuas and that has softened the empty nest syndrome.I have two adult children. One of them has two little children.
Both my kids are doing great!
We talk a lot on the phone & visit at least once a month.
My only comp!ain't is that I go there; but the kids are working, and I'm not, so its easier, really, to drive 4 hours to visit them.
Both my kids are doing great!
We talk a lot on the phone & visit at least once a month.
My only comp!ain't is that I go there; but the kids are working, and I'm not, so its easier, really, to drive 4 hours to visit them.
Have two grown kids, no issues, one grand daughter, one step grand son. Both live within an hour from us.
I won't either. Just occasionally. I dote over them when I'm at their house. lol But I have 13 grandkids now ages 25 to 3. I think. lol
Actually, I find it harder as adults than when they were kids. 4 kids, 13 grandkids (and now 1 ggrand). And since my autism diagnosis about 6 or so years ago, they all realized they probably are and a few of the grandkids have a definite diagnosis because problems in school. Probably more are than not.Yes, we managed to raise two units of humanity.
Anyway I get along as best friends with 2, and as long as I don't speak my thoughts do okay with the other 2. I get so tired of them shushing me. grrr
What exactly they don't like hearing from you?
I have one adult son who refuses to have anything to do with me. But he is so sweet-nasty to me that this does not bother me. He is unpleasant to be around.
He has one son who lives in Sweden with his mother, who is a Swedish citizen. So is my grandchild. I have seen him twice. Neither time was much fun and both parents were sure I was going to drop him or do some other permanent damage.
Interestingly enough, it is my foster daughter who has grown into a wonderful caring loving adult. At 25, she is now in her first serious relationship. We just spent a glorious weekend together. I've never been particularly interested in grandchildren, but on the drive home, it suddenly occurred to me that I might have grandchildren because of her. I was thrilled. I can't wait. Total and complete reversal in my opinion of having grandchildren.
He has one son who lives in Sweden with his mother, who is a Swedish citizen. So is my grandchild. I have seen him twice. Neither time was much fun and both parents were sure I was going to drop him or do some other permanent damage.
Interestingly enough, it is my foster daughter who has grown into a wonderful caring loving adult. At 25, she is now in her first serious relationship. We just spent a glorious weekend together. I've never been particularly interested in grandchildren, but on the drive home, it suddenly occurred to me that I might have grandchildren because of her. I was thrilled. I can't wait. Total and complete reversal in my opinion of having grandchildren.
