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AS = problems with reading social cues?

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I stumbled across the following passage in this website: (http://www.aspergerssyndrome.net/index.htm)

I was actually looking for clarification of the differences between HFA and Aspergers, and I took notice of this website only because the author seems to think that HFA means "High Functioning Aspergers". :rolleyes2:

Anyway, the following struck me as absolutely spot on for me and I couldn't have put it nearly as well myself. So regardless of correct or incorrect use of acronyms, I have to take my hat off to the author. I would be interested in whether anyone else thinks that there is some truth in what he says in the following passage:

High functioning Aspergers Syndrome
One of the most disturbing aspects of Higher Functioning children with Aspergers (HFA) is their clumsy, nerdish social skills. Though they want to be accepted by their peers, they tend to be very hurt and frustrated by their lack of social success.

Their ability to respond is confounded by the negative feedback that these children get from their painful social interactions. This greatly magnifies their social problems. Like any of us, when we get negative feedback, we become unhappy. This further inhibits their social skills, and a vicious circle develops. The worse they perform socially, the more negative feedback they get, so the worse they feel and perform.

As this feedback loop iterates, dealing with social situations for Aspergers children become similar to spending their social life on stage anxiously giving a speech. And, for the same reasons that such speeches come off clumsy, with a mechanical sounding voice, stiff gestures and forgotten lines and a turned off the audience is the same reason HFA kids fumble socially and are rejected. Because of this consistent negative social feedback, many of these children feel depressed, anxious and angry. This just compounds their social difficulties by further paralyzing them in social situations.

Reading social Cues

Though they do not appear to read social situations well, HFA children actually do .

One of my articulate patients put it well.

“I find I'm able to read people really well, but I usually don't respond accordingly.”

Though in real time social situations, HFA's may look and feel as if they do not understand what to do, that is not the real issue. Like the person who practices a speech until they sound like Cicero, but freezes on stage, it is not that they do not have the skills to give the speech. They have clearly demonstrated these skills and knowledge during practice. However, their emotional arousal keeps them from accessing their skills real time. Most Aspergers children can explain what they need to do in social situations, thus demonstrating their knowledge. However, like the public speaker, they cannot demonstrate it in the real situation.
 
My issue with this is that, unless I am misreading (which is possible, it's been two days since I've slept), it is assuming that anxiety in social situations is present. It isn't.
 
My issue with this is that, unless I am misreading (which is possible, it's been two days since I've slept), it is assuming that anxiety in social situations is present. It isn't.

The way I read it is that the anxiety is often only there because of negative feedback you have had in the past from reacting inappropriately in social situations, and fear/knowledge that you are likely to do it again.
 
I guess that raises a good point. I must know how to act on social cues to some extent - people's actions don't seem odd to me - it's just they're delayed/slower/I can't figure out and say what I want in the right way fast enough. I guess it's acting on the social cues is also a factor of my shyness.
 
For me, I will be thinking, "okay, facial muscles, I am interested in what this person is saying-- emote! go go!" and nothing happens. It's like my brain is there but I cannot translate the thoughts into actions. Or I will think, "okay, I am supposed to be saying something right now!" but my brain gives me literally nothing to work with. It's like it shuts off. I have an anxiety disorder, believe me I know anxiety, and I do not feel it at all in the least when socializing. I just don't know how to do things.
 
It all sounds pretty familiar. Sometimes I have to set a timer in my head - count down from 5 or 10, then just go or do whatever it was I'm meant to be doing. Granted, this concept has been most useful for overcoming my fear of heights when diving, but I've used it before in social situations. Sometimes I feel like I have a mental block and I can't seem to pronounce words or whatever.
 
It's not always the case, though it is particularly true (cognitively) in the very young Aspie. There is still another component to mental development other than just pure mimicry, or masking, or neglect, when it comes to reading social cues. Even a non-aspergic, non-high-functioning classical autist can develop this sense as well, to a certain extent of natural reflexivity.

I'd like to say that the aspergic neuro-flexibility is often like a severely tense catapult. Its mental range of fluidity can surprise you any time when some tension is released, like a long-suppressed spring ready to convert a huge amount of potential energy into dazzling kinetic energy.
 

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