Aspergers diagnosis at 55

[ChrisTX1968]

Hey, this is Chris, male 55, live in Texas. My journey to my Asperger's diagnosis includes bipolar 2, ADHD, substance abuse disorder, and anxiety disorder diagnoses at age 50, and then a slow journey of discovery that the root of my neuro-diversity is AS. I have worked for over 30 year in healthcare accounting and finance, and still do. Married for 18 years, divorced for 3. Two kids 18+. Sober from alcohol for 1 year. I mention this next part because it is part of my story - I am at high percentiles in IQ, verbal reasoning, and especially high in mental processing speed. I am very thankful these strengths.

As a child I had high interest in narrow technical subjects, spent most time alone, and had zero ability to connect the opposite sex. I did do very well in several sports, but never felt connected to my teams. I could copy behavior that I thought made me a good teammate, and I assume my abilities made my interpersonal issues an issue that didn't need to be addressed. I don't know what my parents knew about me in the 1970s. I don't want to know if they knew and have never told me. They are both still alive.

 

[Nitro]

 

[Mwesson1966]

Welcome to our world. I, too, am in Texas. It would take a thousand pages for me to share my life with this condition. But, I will spare you. I think you know already. Welcome to the site.

 

[stevens]

I don't know what my parents knew about me in the 1970s. I don't want to know if they knew and have never told me. They are both still alive.

Hi Chris,
Welcome. I'm a late diagnosed person who also had a long technical career. I knew for sure what my problem was in the mid 1990's, but it was only two years ago that the confirmation came.

I'm a bit more than decade older, and I can say for sure there was no appreciation for this end of the spectrum in the 1960's and 1970's in the United States. I doubt that your parents knew anything, except maybe that you were "weird." My parents knew this about me, but they had no way of explaining it.

Some people write of parents who conceal diagnoses from their children. Most of these people will have started school after about 1995. There was a growing awareness of neurodivergence then. I often wonder what it would have been like to attend school with some of the younger people I have talked with. Their experience seems to have been different than mine.

Once again, welcome and best wishes.

 

[ChrisTX1968]

Welcome to our world. I, too, am in Texas. It would take a thousand pages for me to share my life with this condition. But, I will spare you. I think you know already. Welcome to the site.

Thank you. It was good for me to write out some of my journey. Mine is just getting unpacked.

 

[SusanLR]

Welcome Chris.
I'm 66. Diagnosed at your age.
No one thought about ASD when I was a kid in school.
Getting the diagnosis sure explained a lot for me too.
I had narrow interests and no interest in the opposite sex, even in puberty.
Asexual I found out later.
Never was good at sports. The only sport I liked was tennis and it was hard to find others to play with because I never was that good at it.

Glad you found the forum!

 

[Rodafina]

Hello and welcome. I hope we can be a supportive and positive little corner of the internet for you. Glad you found us.

 

[Gerald Wilgus]

Welcome. i was diagnosed at 60. Growing up in the 50s - 60s autism was rarely diagnosed. As a teen and young adult I knew something was wrong, especially with my social dysfunction and so I internalized stories about myself that were damaging.

 

[Alexej]

Hi and welcome. There are many in here who are diagnosed later in life.
Do make yourself at home, and read some of the older posts - lots of interesting info and experiene there

 

[ChrisTX1968]

Hi Chris,
Welcome. I'm a late diagnosed person who also had a long technical career. I knew for sure what my problem was in the mid 1990's, but it was only two years ago that the confirmation came.

I'm a bit more than decade older, and I can say for sure there was no appreciation for this end of the spectrum in the 1960's and 1970's in the United States. I doubt that your parents knew anything, except maybe that you were "weird." My parents knew this about me, but they had no way of explaining it.

Some people write of parents who conceal diagnoses from their children. Most of these people will have started school after about 1995. There was a growing awareness of neurodivergence then. I often wonder what it would have been like to attend school with some of the younger people I have talked with. Their experience seems to have been different than mine.

Once again, welcome and best wishes.

Hi, I appreciate hearing from you...encouraging that I don't really think now my folks concealed anything, they just didn't know anything about it. I did well in school in all subjects, so that was not a red flag. And everything else fell under "shy, different, introvert, etc". I bet those are words ALL of us have heard! chris

 

[ChrisTX1968]

Welcome. i was diagnosed at 60. Growing up in the 50s - 60s autism was rarely diagnosed. As a teen and young adult I knew something was wrong, especially with my social dysfunction and so I internalized stories about myself that were damaging.

I had the same...almost like puberty started the full social dysfunction. Interesting as I got into my 20s, I would do good at initial impressions and banter/small talk, but then going further I always failed by inaction. Friends would say she was showing me every sign of interest, but I had no clue.

 

[Gerald Wilgus]

I had the same...almost like puberty started the full social dysfunction. Interesting as I got into my 20s, I would do good at initial impressions and banter/small talk, but then going further I always failed by inaction. Friends would say she was showing me every sign of interest, but I had no clue.

Exactly! I had to approach social communication by studying it and know before then that I was not ready for any relationship. Hard because guys are still expected to make the first move. To practice being social I joined activity groups and finally met a woman who was looking for a man she could do outdoor activities with and we are still active together.

 

[Magna]

Hey, this is Chris, male 55, live in Texas. My journey to my Asperger's diagnosis includes bipolar 2, ADHD, substance abuse disorder, and anxiety disorder diagnoses at age 50, and then a slow journey of discovery that the root of my neuro-diversity is AS. I have worked for over 30 year in healthcare accounting and finance, and still do. Married for 18 years, divorced for 3. Two kids 18+. Sober from alcohol for 1 year. I mention this next part because it is part of my story - I am at high percentiles in IQ, verbal reasoning, and especially high in mental processing speed. I am very thankful these strengths.

As a child I had high interest in narrow technical subjects, spent most time alone, and had zero ability to connect the opposite sex. I did do very well in several sports, but never felt connected to my teams. I could copy behavior that I thought made me a good teammate, and I assume my abilities made my interpersonal issues an issue that didn't need to be addressed. I don't know what my parents knew about me in the 1970s. I don't want to know if they knew and have never told me. They are both still alive.

Welcome. You're only a few years older than me. I grew in the 1970s as well. My mom died in 2018 and I wasn't diagnosed until the year after. I sure wish it's something my mom could have known about me or that she and I could have discussed.

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

I was never diagnosed found out myself on mu mid-fifties. Explained everything. got tested for other stuff like abstract reasoning. the way the phycologist described my ability after was profound unlike anything she had seen before. she phoned me and I could tell she was stunned. Being an Aspie explained my career, other than that. not much else. Realized in the last few days I am something that is almost oxymoronic I'm an extraverted Aspie. keep to myself, bite my tongue a lot in social situation. usually, the brightest guy in the room. IQ Test are not remotely accurate.at least for outliers like many of us.

 

[VictorR]

Welcome!

I absolutely concur that skill or ability at something can be a double-edged sword in that it can help protect us by having others simply accept that we're different, but at the same time shield us from learning how those differences, in other contexts, may result in misunderstandings or other challenges.

 

[ChrisTX1968]

I was never diagnosed found out myself on mu mid-fifties. Explained everything. got tested for other stuff like abstract reasoning. the way the phycologist described my ability after was profound unlike anything she had seen before. she phoned me and I could tell she was stunned. Being an Aspie explained my career, other than that. not much else. Realized in the last few days I am something that is almost oxymoronic I'm an extraverted Aspie. keep to myself, bite my tongue a lot in social situation. usually, the brightest guy in the room. IQ Test are not remotely accurate.at least for outliers like many of us.

On my full profile, I got I think something similar - significant gifts and profound social impairments.

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

I did not have significant social impairments. along with being an Aspie I am also a extravert. love to talk but mainly about my interests that just happen to be coatings, inks and color, every major paint manufacture, constantly came to see me As I was as much expert as they were the reps and techies. really enjoyed my company. Expert teaching the experts. Company did not recognize my expertise management decided that wanted to hire a quality engineer.
I had a management certificate in quality engineering close to 40 years' experience every Couse I took was an A still passed me over for an outside candidate and then the wondered why. I did not to work past my retirement. scared shitless now that a competitor. could approach me. They want to grow the business but are unable to do so even bought other coil lines. other coil lines would love to get me, but I have no interest.

 

[Kisa the tea]

Hello and welcome to the forum, Chris. I hope you enjoy it here!