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Awaiting diagnosis

Gem

New Member
Please can anyone help… my son is 4 years old and has attended pre school for the past year and a half and is starting school in September. The pre school had picked up on a few things that caused concern and have referred my son to an occupational therapist, we at home had noticed a few signs too but at the time were unaware the behaviours could be a sign of additional needs. we have been told this can take up to 2 years to even be seen! The pre school have noticed my son is very advanced and loves to learn but he is not able to play with other children In a group situation, he will play on his own in a group.

The most noticeable sign is his hand flapping, this is becoming more intense as he gets older and this can happen at any time. My son likes routine and we have to explain what is happening each day and if anything unexpected happens it throws him and he struggles to deal with the change. He doesn’t like certain noises (hand dryers, vacuums etc) as we will be waiting a long time for any diagnoses/support I wondered if anyone has any advice on how to manage this? By doing our own research we feel my son could be autistic but obviously are unsure at the moment.
 
@Gem,...are you in the US? If so, you should be able to find a local pediatric autism testing center,...either stand alone clinics or as part of a mental health hospital campus. Most insurances will cover most of the cost of your testing. You don't necessarily need a pediatrician's referral,...myself and with my children,...literally just called and set up an appointment.

If we assume, for a moment, your child does have autism: Obviously, the earlier the diagnosis, the earlier you can take advantage of the growing child's neuroplasticity,...and through therapies and you working with him, develop and reinforce alternate brain conduction pathways that will minimize the symptoms and behaviors of the underlying condition. A rather famous autistic scientist, Temple Grandin, suggests parents of autistic children,...instead of protecting them and sheltering them,..."stretch them" intellectually by guiding them into tasks and situations that perhaps even a "normal" parent and child might not. In other words,...push,...but don't shove.

At some point, you may want to discover all the reasons for autism. I would suggest you get onto Google Scholar and look at "autism and genetics and epigenetics", "autism and brain imaging" to start,...if you limit your searches to 2018 - current, you will get the most recent data. Although, currently, autism is diagnosed in the psychologist's office,...we are nearing a crossroads where genetic testing and neuroimaging are likely going to be part of the process. A "medical model" is appearing,...it's not exclusively a "psychological" or "psychiatric" condition,...there is an anatomical and physiological reason for the baseline behaviors. Furthermore, we appear to be confirming that there are 100's of different "autisms"...pleural,...each with their own genetic phenotypes.

Well,...we can chat later,...but hopefully this helps.
 
welcome to af.png
 
Please can anyone help… my son is 4 years old and has attended pre school for the past year and a half and is starting school in September. The pre school had picked up on a few things that caused concern and have referred my son to an occupational therapist, we at home had noticed a few signs too but at the time were unaware the behaviours could be a sign of additional needs. we have been told this can take up to 2 years to even be seen! The pre school have noticed my son is very advanced and loves to learn but he is not able to play with other children In a group situation, he will play on his own in a group. The most noticeable sign is his hand flapping, this is becoming more intense as he gets older and this can happen at any time. My son likes routine and we have to explain what is happening each day and if anything unexpected happens it throws him and he struggles to deal with the change. He doesn’t like certain noises (hand dryers, vacuums etc) as we will be waiting a long time for any diagnoses/support I wondered if anyone has any advice on how to manage this? By doing our own research we feel my son could be autistic but obviously are unsure at the moment.
@Gem,...are you in the US? If so, you should be able to find a local pediatric autism testing center,...either stand alone clinics or as part of a mental health hospital campus. Most insurances will cover most of the cost of your testing. You don't necessarily need a pediatrician's referral,...myself and with my children,...literally just called and set up an appointment.

If we assume, for a moment, your child does have autism: Obviously, the earlier the diagnosis, the earlier you can take advantage of the growing child's neuroplasticity,...and through therapies and you working with him, develop and reinforce alternate brain conduction pathways that will minimize the symptoms and behaviors of the underlying condition. A rather famous autistic scientist, Temple Grandin, suggests parents of autistic children,...instead of protecting them and sheltering them,..."stretch them" intellectually by guiding them into tasks and situations that perhaps even a "normal" parent and child might not. In other words,...push,...but don't shove.

At some point, you may want to discover all the reasons for autism. I would suggest you get onto Google Scholar and look at "autism and genetics and epigenetics", "autism and brain imaging" to start,...if you limit your searches to 2018 - current, you will get the most recent data. Although, currently, autism is diagnosed in the psychologist's office,...we are nearing a crossroads where genetic testing and neuroimaging are likely going to be part of the process. A "medical model" is appearing,...it's not exclusively a "psychological" or "psychiatric" condition,...there is an anatomical and physiological reason for the baseline behaviors. Furthermore, we appear to be confirming that there are 100's of different "autisms"...pleural,...each with their own genetic phenotypes.

Well,...we can chat later,...but hopefully this helps.

Thankyou for your reply we are in the UK. My son has been referred by his pre school to a paediatrician but it seems there is a long wait for him to be seen and we just want to make sure we are dealing with situations correctly. Thank you for the info I will look into this!
 
I wondered if anyone has any advice on how to manage this?
If you haven't done so already, there are several short videos on YouTube. Search "Autism tips for parents". I suspect, as you do, from your description, that your son likely is on the spectrum. Some of these tips should help until you get an official diagnosis.
 
Please can anyone help… my son is 4 years old and has attended pre school for the past year and a half and is starting school in September. The pre school had picked up on a few things that caused concern and have referred my son to an occupational therapist, we at home had noticed a few signs too but at the time were unaware the behaviours could be a sign of additional needs. we have been told this can take up to 2 years to even be seen! The pre school have noticed my son is very advanced and loves to learn but he is not able to play with other children In a group situation, he will play on his own in a group.

The most noticeable sign is his hand flapping, this is becoming more intense as he gets older and this can happen at any time. My son likes routine and we have to explain what is happening each day and if anything unexpected happens it throws him and he struggles to deal with the change.

Difficulty interacting with other children often stems from difficulty with parents at home. Are you spending enough time playing with your son? Are you warm, positive, and supportive? Do you pay attention to his emotional states, help him understand his emotions, and adequately respond to them?

He doesn’t like certain noises (hand dryers, vacuums etc) as we will be waiting a long time for any diagnoses/support I wondered if anyone has any advice on how to manage this?

There is a simple solution to this problem. Stop using hand dryers and vacuums when he is around. No one likes obnoxiously loud noise. I don't get why these devices aren't illegal. Towels and brooms have been good enough for hundreds of years.
 
@Gem -

Dr Tony Attwood is one of the worlds leading experts on Autism, specifically HF ASD level 1, also referred to as Aspergers Syndrome. If you look for him on Youtube, there are dozens of very informative videos that may get you started. I would also recommend his excellent book, 'The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome' which is available on Amazon. This book will give you much insight into your son and help you get started in assisting him.

Here are a few links to get you started. Please note, the Amazon link is for the U.S.

Your son is very fortunate to have a loving parent like you.

https://tonyattwood.com.au
https://www.amazon.com/Complete-Gui...efix=the+complete+guide+to+aspe,aps,99&sr=8-1

https://www.facebook.com/drtonyattwood/
https://attwoodandgarnettevents.com/product/autism-for-parents-and-carers-14-october-2022/
 
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Hi and welcome. I'm in the UK too. Your son sounds great, there are lots of upsides, like, he's really clever and sounds to be doing well. Hand flapping is a way to cope that feels nice to many people with autism , it's called a stim because it's stimulating or a result of being stimulated. It's not a problem and is quite normal for many people with autism.

He probably does prefer to play individually, it's called parallel play and it's common for children with autism enjoy that and do it. The communication and social issues are spotted now, but were not when I was a child. I was at a grammar school, had some of the issues your son has, but I passed my exams and was never helped with social areas I wasn't able to navigate. I then went to University and coped adequately.

Your son is likely in the same category as many adults here, in that he doesn't have learning difficulties, just ASD1 and will appreciate support with relating to others. We have less intuitive ways of communication, but research has shown autistic people form attachments same as neurotypical people, and if they have low confidence or have difficulties making friends, same as for anyone, they can become insecure, and can also gain confidence in relating with others, and feel more secure.

Many here have interesting jobs and careers, I was employed all my working life and gained good qualifications in Education and Counselling. I became a counselling trainer. Your son sounds like he's doing well, he can become secure in relating with kindess and appreciation and support, like anyone else can. He may not make friends easily, as we miss signals and don't always notice conventions that others feel important. But many of us have one or 2 friends, or more , and we're valued for our strengths. He's unique, and just has a different neurology from the majoritys. Arguably that doesn't require a diagnosis as it's a difference, not an illness. Hope all goes well for him and you.
 
It's hard for me to believe that a child would be refused treatment for two years, especially with an issue that demands early intervention. Is this because it's the UK? Have you explored any other possibilities, if any exist, for getting faster treatment? Where I live it's all pretty immediate.
 
Difficulty interacting with other children often stems from difficulty with parents at home. Are you spending enough time playing with your son? Are you warm, positive, and supportive? Do you pay attention to his emotional states, help him understand his emotions, and adequately respond to them?



There is a simple solution to this problem. Stop using hand dryers and vacuums when he is around. No one likes obnoxiously loud noise. I don't get why these devices aren't illegal. Towels and brooms have been good enough for hundreds of years.
Hi! Thanks for your reply ☺️ He can interact with children, he will happily have a conversation with them and will sometimes join in but has always preferred to play alone, even before starting pre school when myself and my partner would play with him he would always go off on his own and leave us playing yes we do try to help and explain different emotions (happy, sad, exited etc) and try to support him to express them. we will vacuum when he is not around and do not use hand dryers while in public toilets (other people do though and it upsets him)
 
@Gem -

Dr Tony Attwood is one of the worlds leading experts on Autism, specifically HF ASD level 1, also referred to as Aspergers Syndrome. If you look for him on Youtube, there are dozens of very informative videos that may get you started. I would also recommend his excellent book, 'The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome' which is available on Amazon. This book will give you much insight into your son and help you get started in assisting him.

Here are a few links to get you started. Please note, the Amazon link is for the U.S.

Your son is very fortunate to have a loving parent like you.

https://tonyattwood.com.au
https://www.amazon.com/Complete-Gui...efix=the+complete+guide+to+aspe,aps,99&sr=8-1

https://www.facebook.com/drtonyattwood/
https://attwoodandgarnettevents.com/product/autism-for-parents-and-carers-14-october-2022/

Thankyou for this info I will have a look at these! And Thankyou for your kind words, We just want to make sure we are we are able to support him and know how to deal with certain situations and make sure he is happy
 
Hi and welcome. I'm in the UK too. Your son sounds great, there are lots of upsides, like, he's really clever and sounds to be doing well. Hand flapping is a way to cope that feels nice to many people with autism , it's called a stim because it's stimulating or a result of being stimulated. It's not a problem and is quite normal for many people with autism.

He probably does prefer to play individually, it's called parallel play and it's common for children with autism enjoy that and do it. The communication and social issues are spotted now, but were not when I was a child. I was at a grammar school, had some of the issues your son has, but I passed my exams and was never helped with social areas I wasn't able to navigate. I then went to University and coped adequately.

Your son is likely in the same category as many adults here, in that he doesn't have learning difficulties, just ASD1 and will appreciate support with relating to others. We have less intuitive ways of communication, but research has shown autistic people form attachments same as neurotypical people, and if they have low confidence or have difficulties making friends, same as for anyone, they can become insecure, and can also gain confidence in relating with others, and feel more secure.

Many here have interesting jobs and careers, I was employed all my working life and gained good qualifications in Education and Counselling. I became a counselling trainer. Your son sounds like he's doing well, he can become secure in relating with kindess and appreciation and support, like anyone else can. He may not make friends easily, as we miss signals and don't always notice conventions that others feel important. But many of us have one or 2 friends, or more , and we're valued for our strengths. He's unique, and just has a different neurology from the majoritys. Arguably that doesn't require a diagnosis as it's a difference, not an illness. Hope all goes well for him and you.
Thankyou! Yes he is amazing, he is very advanced with his learning. He loves reading, writing and is very inquisitive and we encourage and support this. With the hand flapping… this is getting progressively worse as he gets older and can sometimes cause him to catch his arms on anything near him, he used to do this when he became exited but now it can be at any time. We have been unsure wether to make him aware that he is doing this (as he doesn’t seem to know) or let him be. He is very confident and will have a conversation with anyone but prefers adult company ☺️ Yes there is a lot more support these days which is great! That’s amazing you’ve gained good qualifications and also reassuring to know for my son, Thankyou!
 
It's hard for me to believe that a child would be refused treatment for two years, especially with an issue that demands early intervention. Is this because it's the UK? Have you explored any other possibilities, if any exist, for getting faster treatment? Where I live it's all pretty immediate.
Hi! His pre school referred him in Feb this year and we were sent a form to complete. We hoped that we would hear back from them before he finished pre school (last week) but we had heard nothing. On meeting with his new school which he starts in September I had a conversation with one of the teachers who advised the process can take upto 2 years which was not what we had hoped for I have contacted our doctor and we await to hear back from them! I hope they may be able to get the process moving quicker as we would really like to get support before he goes to school
 
Hi! Thanks for your reply ☺️ He can interact with children, he will happily have a conversation with them and will sometimes join in but has always preferred to play alone, even before starting pre school when myself and my partner would play with him he would always go off on his own and leave us playing yes we do try to help and explain different emotions (happy, sad, exited etc) and try to support him to express them. we will vacuum when he is not around and do not use hand dryers while in public toilets (other people do though and it upsets him)

I forgot to mention that some people are bothered by noise because they have hyperacusis which is a condition that causes people to hear noise more loudly. If your son has hyperacusis, the noise he hears from a hand dryer and other similarly loud noises may be the equivalent of someone standing next to you and screaming in your ears. He may get upset because the noise hurts his ears or gives him a headache. He may prefer to play alone because other people, especially children his age, are too loud.
 

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