Bowing Out For A While

[Gomendosi]

I have decided to take a break from the internet for a while; I also asked family not to visit me either!

Do you ever reach a point where you just go; "that's enough, I can't handle the pace" and you just go somewhere and lock yourself away?

I have lately been unable to differentiate between outside negativity and my own personality, like I hold my tongue about everything because I would only say something cruel, provocative or inflammatory and I can't decide if that is due to my personality or simply a reaction to the negativity that surrounds me.

Do you let people?s negativity affect you or is it like water off a ducks back?

I often find that in my usual discourse with others all they ever seem to do is whinge and whine about how horrible things are and it kind of sucks the joy out of talking to people, I don't understand why people can't discuss things that make them happy first or just touch on things that are non-pleasurable and not make that the sole reason for holding a conversation in the first place.

Alternatively, people get on the internet to explain and get help with things from people who also have that same difficulty (ostensibly whinging and whining); they don't usually appreciate being ridiculed for being different or put down for feeling that way or told that we are wrong.

Really, what it all boils down to is that I cannot for the life of me understand why people have to be so bigoted and elitist and reactionary all the time, if someone has a differing opinion to you, don't just bludgeon them over the head with yours until, in a fit of tears, they accept your opinion as fact, and don't pretend to be friendly with people if later on your only going to slip snide and sarcastic comments into seemingly unrelated and otherwise pleasant conversations.
My mother as an example is absolutely certain that as she gave birth to me I cannot possibly have more or different knowledge on any subject than her and so she closes her mind to the fact that I may have accrued information she has previously not been privy to.

Bah, people, I don't understand them!

 

[total-recoil]

"Do you ever reach a point where you just go; "that's enough, I can't handle the pace" and you just go somewhere and lock yourself away?"

Yes. I think I accepted I won't be leading a normal life but, when I do withdraw, I try to do something useful like projects and work.

"I have lately been unable to differentiate between outside negativity and my own personality"

Sounds like you may like to look into Zen. It teaches about dealing with negativity in yourself and externally. However, I know what you mean and that's why I got rid of my T.V. and only tend to read textbooks and watch movies I myself select rather than listen to negativity on the T.V.

"Really, what it all boils down to is that I cannot for the life of me understand why people have to be so bigoted and elitist and reactionary all the time, if someone has a differing opinion to you, don't just bludgeon them over the head with yours...."

Not always, though. I guess if I feel that way I tend to spend more time with my dog for a while as I find although animals are silent, they can make me relax.



QUOTE=Gomendosi;31822]I have decided to take a break from the internet for a while; I also asked family not to visit me either!

Do you ever reach a point where you just go; "that's enough, I can't handle the pace" and you just go somewhere and lock yourself away?

I have lately been unable to differentiate between outside negativity and my own personality, like I hold my tongue about everything because I would only say something cruel, provocative or inflammatory and I can't decide if that is due to my personality or simply a reaction to the negativity that surrounds me.

Do you let people?s negativity affect you or is it like water off a ducks back?

I often find that in my usual discourse with others all they ever seem to do is whinge and whine about how horrible things are and it kind of sucks the joy out of talking to people, I don't understand why people can't discuss things that make them happy first or just touch on things that are non-pleasurable and not make that the sole reason for holding a conversation in the first place.

Alternatively, people get on the internet to explain and get help with things from people who also have that same difficulty (ostensibly whinging and whining); they don't usually appreciate being ridiculed for being different or put down for feeling that way or told that we are wrong.

Really, what it all boils down to is that I cannot for the life of me understand why people have to be so bigoted and elitist and reactionary all the time, if someone has a differing opinion to you, don't just bludgeon them over the head with yours until, in a fit of tears, they accept your opinion as fact, and don't pretend to be friendly with people if later on your only going to slip snide and sarcastic comments into seemingly unrelated and otherwise pleasant conversations.
My mother as an example is absolutely certain that as she gave birth to me I cannot possibly have more or different knowledge on any subject than her and so she closes her mind to the fact that I may have accrued information she has previously not been privy to.

Bah, people, I don't understand them![/QUOTE]

 

[King_Oni]

I have decided to take a break from the internet for a while; I also asked family not to visit me either!

Do you ever reach a point where you just go; "that's enough, I can't handle the pace" and you just go somewhere and lock yourself away?

I have lately been unable to differentiate between outside negativity and my own personality, like I hold my tongue about everything because I would only say something cruel, provocative or inflammatory and I can't decide if that is due to my personality or simply a reaction to the negativity that surrounds me.

Do you let people’s negativity affect you or is it like water off a ducks back?

I often find that in my usual discourse with others all they ever seem to do is whinge and whine about how horrible things are and it kind of sucks the joy out of talking to people, I don't understand why people can't discuss things that make them happy first or just touch on things that are non-pleasurable and not make that the sole reason for holding a conversation in the first place.

Alternatively, people get on the internet to explain and get help with things from people who also have that same difficulty (ostensibly whinging and whining); they don't usually appreciate being ridiculed for being different or put down for feeling that way or told that we are wrong.

Really, what it all boils down to is that I cannot for the life of me understand why people have to be so bigoted and elitist and reactionary all the time, if someone has a differing opinion to you, don't just bludgeon them over the head with yours until, in a fit of tears, they accept your opinion as fact, and don't pretend to be friendly with people if later on your only going to slip snide and sarcastic comments into seemingly unrelated and otherwise pleasant conversations.
My mother as an example is absolutely certain that as she gave birth to me I cannot possibly have more or different knowledge on any subject than her and so she closes her mind to the fact that I may have accrued information she has previously not been privy to.

Bah, people, I don't understand them!

Could it be 50/50; personality and negative energy around you?

As for it affecting me; I try not to. Yes sometimes it bothers me that some people keep going on about negative issues, and much like you I sometimes wonder why people can't just discuss more fun things. But for instance on this forum; it's where negative factors, that might or might not be part of AS, that I discuss as such. That's what forums should be for. But I do agree that they are not there to bludgeon someone with your opinion. However, some opinions came come across harsh (or some people in general do even).

I don't deal with a lot of people in real life (on a regular basis 4; my parents, my girlfriend and a friend) and I don't even talk to them a lot... and if they tend to go a negative route for no apparent reason rather than "just because" I'll tell them to shut up, since this does not contribute to "fun" and the reason why I'm interacting with them in the first place. Is it wrong? I don't know... it might come across as censorship, but I do want to control how much of stress of others I can and will soak up.

 

[total-recoil]

I've made it my personal rule not to let myself be occupied with or discuss aspergers in a way that might be out of proportion to my own attempts at balance. What I mean is, I only recently found out I have aspergers so, on one hand, I want to learn as much as I can about it and, by on the other hand, I don't want to get bogged down with a concept of life as it relates only to my own struggles and difficulties. I am what I am and I have to move ahead and use what I have possibly to advantage.
Now what I tend to do is spend as much time as I can on my "special interests" and then I will sort of wind down finding out what I can about aspergers and other aspies and how things all relate.
Of course, there are negative sides to being aspie so I think we all tend to open up online, possibly wring our hands at our situation when we live through life not relating to those around us. You could say, yes, at times I feel sorry for myself but not any more in the sense I'm not aware a lot of other people may be far worse off.
When feeling particularly negative, I find it helps to either do more sports (gets some dopamine flowing) or get bogged down with whatever special interest there may be.
Another point is if we're not good at relationships or friendships (as I never have been), it's best not to focus on the negative but try and channel energy into something you can do. That's what tends to help me pull through the bad patches.

Could it be 50/50; personality and negative energy around you?

As for it affecting me; I try not to. Yes sometimes it bothers me that some people keep going on about negative issues, and much like you I sometimes wonder why people can't just discuss more fun things. But for instance on this forum; it's where negative factors, that might or might not be part of AS, that I discuss as such. That's what forums should be for. But I do agree that they are not there to bludgeon someone with your opinion. However, some opinions came come across harsh (or some people in general do even).

I don't deal with a lot of people in real life (on a regular basis 4; my parents, my girlfriend and a friend) and I don't even talk to them a lot... and if they tend to go a negative route for no apparent reason rather than "just because" I'll tell them to shut up, since this does not contribute to "fun" and the reason why I'm interacting with them in the first place. Is it wrong? I don't know... it might come across as censorship, but I do want to control how much of stress of others I can and will soak up.