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darangal

darangal

Member
I was diagnosed around 4 or 11, 30 now, with Aspergers syndrome before the DSM did their Autism Spectrum thing. I honestly don't know because I actively block out information about my diagnosis and how I function in the world. I constantly deny, pretend, or forget that I have the diagnosis or the invisible bubble I feel when I try to connect with other people.

I don't understand much about Autism. I want to learn more and try to connect with people who have shared experiences, traumas, and get a better idea of how to function in the world. I've been horrified about getting involved in the autism community from a young age for a few reasons. It would make the diagnosis real, it would make me acknowledge it, and it would open to me being ostracized by an amorphous mass of nameless people.

I don't know. I do know I'm scared. This is scary, and healthy, and I'm doing it.

Hi.
 
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darangal said:
I don't understand much about Autism. I want to learn more and try to connect with people who have shared experiences, traumas, and get a better idea of how to function in the world.
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Firstly welcome

Secondly well done - it’s a massive step forwards to decide to learn more about this and look to understand this aspect of who you are. There’s loads of folks here that can really help you on that journey.
 
Hi!

As the saying goes, knowledge is power. May you find in your readings and interactions ways of better interacting with the world and coping with things that may be stressful or otherwise upsetting to you, and perhaps even make some connections along the way.
 
Welcome to the forum!

I joined here immediately after my diagnosis at age 55.
It was actually a relief for me to know. It explained so much and I've learned a lot from the varied people here.

Hope being here helps you a lot as it did me. :)
 
I agree with @VictorR on the aspect of learning as much as possible about the condition. There is so much information out there on the behavioral, psychological, and psychiatric perspectives, as well as co-morbidities, but my path took me down the road of the "medical model" which looked at the genetic/epigenetic, fetal development, anatomy and physiology. For me, it was important to understand the underlying causes of the behaviors and neuroprocessing.

All of this was important to me in order to know myself and accept the fact that I am who I am because I am not neurotypical. I am something different, and that's OK. Obviously, everyone here has their own "issues", but being autistic is, to me, just a list of "pros and cons". If I were neurotypical, I would have a different list of pros and cons. Yes, the world is designed for neurotypical people, but at the same time, I see a lot of faults in this world, so maybe being neurotypical might not be the best thing given our history. The grass isn't always greener on the other side.
 
Welcome!

Being scared is OK.

Dealing with fear in order to become a better self is better.

And you've already done both of those things! Pat yourself on the back for those two major achievements.

:)
 
darangal said:
I was diagnosed around 4 or 11, 30 now, with Aspergers syndrome before the DSM did their Autism Spectrum thing. I honestly don't know because I actively block out information about my diagnosis and how I function in the world. I constantly deny, pretend, or forget that I have the diagnosis or the invisible bubble I feel when I try to connect with other people.

I don't understand much about Autism. I want to learn more and try to connect with people who have shared experiences, traumas, and get a better idea of how to function in the world. I've been horrified about getting involved in the autism community from a young age for a few reasons. It would make the diagnosis real, it would make me acknowledge it, and it would open to me being ostracized by an amorphous mass of nameless people.

I don't know. I do know I'm scared. This is scary, and healthy, and I'm doing it.

Hi.
Click to expand...
You're not alone with not understanding much about autism, wanting to learn more, try to connect with people, and get a better idea of how to function in the world.

When I first became aware of my situation (2019-2020), I went online, to figure myself out, and *did* get slammed for how I worded things, how I felt about being on the spectrum, and etc.
It can be a bit harsh. I quickly got off all the forums and have spent the time, since then, sticking to YouTube and various related service provider websites.

Now that most of my basic questions, fears, and understandings have been addressed I feel more confident in being in a forum. If anyone comes at me with their political correctness, biases, or judgements I'm more aware of where they're coming from and can explain my boundaries.

I know it's scary. I agree it healthy. I'm happy for you that you're doing it. I sincerely hope this helps you.
 
SusanLR said:
Welcome to the forum!

I joined here immediately after my diagnosis at age 55.
It was actually a relief for me to know. It explained so much and I've learned a lot from the varied people here.

Hope being here helps you a lot as it did me. :)
Click to expand...
Oh! 55? Now I don't feel completely alone in my "ancient diagnosis". :p
 
Welcome. I was totally skeptical of my diagnosis and immediately started researching, only to find I was on totally familiar ground! I was like, this is autism? It's just my life. Just never knew it had a name. I had thought I was just uniquely weird.
 
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