My wife and I have been in healthcare for nearly 40 years. She deals with adults and I deal with kids. We do talk "shop" when we get home.
I don't know your personal experience with whom you dealt with, but just for some perspective, it might not have anything to do with your autism, per se, although it may seem that way from your perspective. It might be, but we deal with all manner of people every day, and what you're describing might not be cause and effect.
If you are in the US, keep in mind that insurance companies micromanage the doctors. The doctor will want to, say, do an MRI because it will give him/her the best information. This goes through the scheduling departments on one end, which may be weeks or months before a time slot is available to even do an MRI. Meanwhile, the doctor's office needs to obtain a "prior approval" to even do the MRI. The insurance company comes back and says, "NO", our algorithm says you need to do an X-ray first. They don't care that the X-ray isn't going to give the doctor the information that is needed. So, you get the X-ray (which also needs to be scheduled and costs everyone time and money). Sure enough, not what they needed. Reorder the MRI and process starts over again.
The same process occurs with ordering prescription medications, surgeries, etc. Did you fail physical therapy first? Did you try this cheaper drug, first?
TIPS: (1) You can get a 75% discount on labs and procedures if you do not have insurance. I learned this the hard way. If I pay cash, my cost is significantly less what the insurance company is going to charge me. ALWAYS ask what the cash, out-of-pocket cost is, before handing over your insurance information at the front desk.
(2) If you are paying cash, you don't need insurance prior approval. That MRI, cash, may cost you $800 (expensive). If you go through insurance, it might be $2400 (really expensive), assuming they even approved it.
(3) Pay cash with discount cards for prescriptions. You can save yourself a ton of money.
(4) Free samples at your doctors office. When the doctor thinks that medication "X" is going to work because you've already failed medications "A" through "R" and the insurance company is dragging their feet or denying an approval, ask if they have free samples.
The Amish community around us do the same thing. Those families pay cash for everything. They take up a church collection and bills are paid.
Insurance is good for catastrophic things like prolonged ICU stays, where you're laid up in the hospital for a long time. Insurance is not good for labs, medications, simple procedures, etc, where it may actually cost you more. I know, it doesn't make a lot of sense, but you might get a bit more traction there and save yourself some time and money.
My personal physician does not accept insurance for some of these same reasons. It's all cash/credit card. He can get things done far more efficiently and economically if he doesn't have to deal with the middle man.
