Core Friends

[2010Dolby]

We obviously all know that making friends is a little bit harder for us on the spectrum. But do any of you have core friends? The ones that you can randomly call or walk into their house? As opposed to extra friends, who we just pass time and hang out with. I think I only have two of the core friends.

 

[Arashi222]

Yes. I have a friend who used to live with us that she still does that. she has her own key and things like that. I thought about this a lot I have a few work people that I talk to or have hung out with. I have two ex-friends one that I work with still because i have no choice and one that was her friend first and works else where. I have two new friends that are quickly becoming my core friends. But I honestly don't have a lot of just hang out friends. I tend to loose friendships too quickly for that.

 

[Bay]

Nope, no core friends, just family. They generally won't throw me out.:lol2:

 

[smith2267]

No, not at this time, although I have had such friends in the past. I am not in a very good position to meet people these days, as I am unemployed and waiting for results of a disability claim

 

[FishyEnthusiest]

I don't really have any friends. There are people at my work that I will talk to when I am there but no one that I can call or just hang out with.

 

[King_Oni]

I think I only have two of the core friends.

You ONLY have 2? Sounds more like luxury to be honest, lol

I have a few friends, but none of them are core in the way you describe them. All of them are people I can eventually hang out with... some I could probably call in the middle of the night. Maybe the general idea of friends and/or close friends isn't exactly the same everywhere. From what I understood, where I live barely anyone just "walks in", except for maybe family who have a key to the front door.

And to be honest, if I had my own place, no one would own a key but me. Not my parents, not my friends, not my girlfriend even. I hate it if people come over in general, let alone if they barge in unexpected.

 

[buckyboy14]

No, not the "core" variety. I have some friends with whom I can hang out, however, and I'm plenty happy with that.

 

[Christian T]

I also have 2 core friends, but those friendships weren't as difficult to form. One is a cousin, who I've known as long as I can remember and with whom I share several interests and happy childhood memories. The other is a fellow aspie who I met during a school production. He's the only person with whom I can spend hours discussing nothing but films. I LOVE cinema!

But anyway, I suppose I've cheated with these core friends.

 

[Kelly]

I don't have any friends so no core friends and from your description I'm kind of glad. Like King_Oni I HATE people coming over, it would drive me crazy if people just turned up on my doorstep unannounced nevermind just coming in. I think if I ever manage to make a friend again it will always be me going to their house because I can't relax when people come here, even the in-laws who I get on well with and have known for 9 years drive me crazy when they visit and almost the whole time they are here I'm wondering when the heck they are going to leave.

 

[76054Pluto]

I count myself pretty lucky as I have one childhood best friend I went to school with and also two slightly younger cousins who are just like best friends and share many of my interests and hobbies. I also have an uncle with Aspergers just a 10 minute car journey away who I see fairly regularly and we always have something interesting to do or talk about.

 

[rolo]

When I lived abroad I worked had a succession of girlfriends and I had friends-they came and went and so did i as i moved around alot-but then I came back to uk and have had 11 years of surgeries and diagnoses- I am more settled now but I am a 47 year old single male with Aspergers and its additionals, unemployed at present and on disability- it makes for a fun time trying to meet non judgementalists-I am lucky to have one friend-she is 41 and has a new baby so is busy-we keep in touch but from a distance-however we have been friends for the last 4 years-her dad died recently and she wants me to go to a celebration of his life so i would count myself as a good friend. My family keep me at a distance and are in denial of my diagnosis- i have no male friends at all any more. however this diagnosis has helped me straighten my head out and maybe i can start meeting people again.

 

[Droopy]

I have about 3-4 core friends but I wouldn't see them on a regular basis or call round at their house. I would rarely text/call them either unless I had too. Still, I consider them closer, one of them very close, than "extra" friends or acquaintances.

 

[Loomis]

Nope no friends. My wife and son were enough until I left Minnesota last week and came to Chicago. I am feeling pretty disoriented at the moment. I grew up in Chicago but have not lived here for 30 years so It is very much like moving to a new city.

 

[Pappy]

I don't have any friends so no core friends and from your description I'm kind of glad. Like King_Oni I HATE people coming over, it would drive me crazy if people just turned up on my doorstep unannounced nevermind just coming in. I think if I ever manage to make a friend again it will always be me going to their house because I can't relax when people come here, even the in-laws who I get on well with and have known for 9 years drive me crazy when they visit and almost the whole time they are here I'm wondering when the heck they are going to leave.

I'm exactly the same when people (inlaws, wifes friends) come to visit, it always feels like they are intruding. I don't mind visiting the inlaws for a brief period and then I just want to leave. I also have no friends whatsoever and I do wish I did have friends, just so that I could talk to them when I needed someone to talk to.

Paul

 

[Csutelan]

Not including my wife and two kids, I really don't have any friends. I was friends with several neighborhood kids when I was growing up in the 70's and 80's but haven't really had any close friends since then.