Denied a social worker.

[Zachary Anderson]

So today I had a meeting with someone who would be my social worker. I was told I needed one in order to get the best help and also to get access to otherwise impossible reasources. I was told that it would be via the mental health team and that it would be structured towards my Autism.
The meeting was a good 30 minute drive away and I had to get a lift off my mum's partner who wasn't at all happy about taking me, that and he was stressing me out with his driving (he was a taxi driver so drives like an idiot) and then he got lost and kept pulling over in spots that you weren't allowed to stop. When I got to the appointment I was pretty anxious and because it was somewhere I hadn't been before (in terms of the building) I was anxious about that. It also didn't help that where the appointment was near where my Gran lived and she passed away last year so I was getting all these emotions from that.
Anyways, I meet the woman who is my social worker and she started doing an assessment, I was really confused by the questions because none of them were about Aspergers. They were about whether I could walk and wash myself. When there was question about cooking I said that I can't cook and only make microwave meals as I get distracted when making a meal from scratch and often don't know the next step in cooking or where to start. She then told me that she was putting 'can cook' and I was like...no, but okay.
Then it was a question about going out on my own. I said that I can go to places I know but only for a short period of time as I get overwhelmed but if I have someone with me then they can help me and also, due to me have seizures, I can't really go out of my own because of safety reasons. The social worker said that she was putting 'can go out' so she didn't listen.

I talked for a good hour and then was told that I wasn't eligible for a social worker. I asked her is she was connected the mental health team because I was told I was getting a mental health social worker. She said she wasn't and even if I did get a support worker (not a social worker) it would only be for a short period of time. I also asked if they would be able to get in contact with my college to see if I could get more help, she said they didn't do that. I also asked about supported living and she said that I didn't need it because I can wash myself. I also asked about help with money, in terms of teaching me about finances as I struggle to understand how to use money correctly and often end up giving it to people that I shouldn't - she said no.
I had a meltdown in her office and tried to leave, I needed to take five minutes outside but she wouldn't let me so I've been worked up all day because she didn't allow me that time away.

I am so confused as I had an assessment on the phone a few months ago and was told it was with the mental health team, I then get the assessment and it isn't that at all and now I've been told I have to wait for another assessment with someone else but she said I might not even get that. So at the moment I can't get access to any help due to me not having a social worker, I can't get respite or additional help at college, I can't get help from the council or the government and I'm just stuck.

I am so emotionally drained. I haven't felt this terrible in a long time, because of this stress I haven' been able to eat anything all day and I'm hungry but too stressed to eat.

 

[Questella]

All of that sucks, I'm sorry they're so unhelpful. I can't really cook much either, microwaves really are a life-saver, it sucks having to live off one. My dude can cook for me so that's sometimes. I try to cook on the stove but I get distracted and burn most everything. I don't know why they even ask these questions sometimes I swear. When WIC asks us if we run out of money to buy food I say yes we do but then it always somehow ends up getting turned around to we're fine. They ask if we have a working oven/stove we don't the oven doesn't work but it just gets marked that we do so idk, I tried having one of those mini-ovens but it freaked me out it'd leaked so much it'd leave huge puddles under it so I got rid of it, I kept expecting it to start an electrical fire.

 

[When In Rome]

Zachary, that does sound to me like an ESA or PIP assessment.

I know I'm probably one of the cynics here but I really do believe that the whole support network and how help is accessed is conveniently knitted in a way that cannot be unravelled and of course, governed by money like everything else.

Try getting ABA for example. I had to go through an 'assessment' very similar to yours actually, questions about anything and everything other than my actual condition and how ABA might help me.

 

[Southern Discomfort]

Yeah, they were similar questions I got when applying for ESA.

You need an advocate for those sort of appointments, I know I needed one. The NHS is very limited on their budget so they can be very cut and dry about how gets what so you really need to fight for yourself.

 

[xudo]

Are you in the UK? If so, would it be possible to contact the National Autistic Society? I would imagine they come across this sort of thing a lot, and maybe they could offer some help in terms of getting you an advocate or even just advice as to what you can do next.

 

[Buzzerfly]

I had social workers assigned to me throughout my life due to my low vision, which I know is different but...

It was rare I had someone compassionate, let alone competent. Honestly, it sounds like this person you met was tired, grumpy and doesn't give a crap about her job. Because of this, she took your very informative answers as "vague" and made you up to be an NT defending that you could cook and could go out, to protect your potential hurt feelings about your own competency. You were just hanging out trying to get some help with stuff you need! You sound like a pretty with it person to me but definetly shouldn't have to worry about eating microwaved food all of the time or having seizures while out!

 

[Buzzerfly]

One time I had this woman who was supposed to teach me how to use a cane in a dark, scary subway station. She kept telling me that people might push me onto the tracks! Then, when I was using my foot to tap each step as we walked down a staircase (instead of the cane), she kept telling me how "ungrateful" I was. I didn't know why she would turn me away from something that was helping me keep safe. And I told her on the way home that I felt she was ungrateful...so she got really mad.

 

[Buzzerfly]

Sorry un-graceful, not grateful

 

[Questella]

If you have seizures, have you been tested for epilepsy? If you get that diagnosis they'd have to help you. My bff has epilepsy and gets benefits from it, she can't work, well she can but nobody will hire her because she's basically just a liability, so she gets a small monthly stipend, medical, and subsidized housing, she even gets to live alone, just in an old folks home but hey still beats a straight up roommate, her housing does suck in they randomly do apartment checks to see if you are following all the rules, one for example she's not allowed to have any kind of throw rugs, she's not allowed to hang things on her doors, she can't have things on her floor (has to have shelves and storage for items) but it still beats the h out of her trying to live with her dad for all of eternity. I think her dad might be paying for her cell phone but other than that she's pretty independent because of the help she gets. She can never drive though because they won't give someone with epilepsy a license because of emergency vehicles with their lights could cause and have caused her to have seizures. That part really sucks I think, I wish they would have a way around it like maybe she should be allowed to drive during daylight hours? All her meds make her a bit loopy and high though so maybe it's for the better she doesn't drive, with her medical she gets free (no-complaint) rides to certain things so that's nice. People in her building drive her to the gym and the store and we take her to the store sometimes also.

 

[Vinca]

Hi @Zachary Anderson

This is a link to information on the National Autistic Societys website. It contains information relevant to what you have experienced and links that would hopefully help you to find someone who could advocate for you.

Community care for adults in England - NAS


This is a link to an Advocacy service that operates in South East London, Kent, Sutton, Havering and Kingston. Even if you don’t live in any of these areas, they have an information page that explains, in easy to understand language, what the "Care Act 2014” is and how an Advocate can help you.

Advocacy for All - Care Act advocacy

 

[toothless]

Zachary, that does sound to me like an ESA or PIP assessment.

I know I'm probably one of the cynics here but I really do believe that the whole support network and how help is accessed is conveniently knitted in a way that cannot be unravelled and of course, governed by money like everything else.

Try getting ABA for example. I had to go through an 'assessment' very similar to yours actually, questions about anything and everything other than my actual condition and how ABA might help me.

it definitely was a social services community care assessment, i sat through one when i was 18 ,and surprisingly-i had one yesterday,because i was swapping from one social services learning [US-intellectual] disability team to another.
i was asked exactly the same questions about personal care,cooking and so on.
for me,i am lower functioning,have obvious classic autism, mild learning disability [in terms of UK definition,not US]and complex needs as well as bipolar,and because ive just been diagnosed with bipolar [though had it for many years] the social services are wondering whether to transfer me to the mental health team or keep me under the learning disability team.

zachary,i experienced a very similar problem when i had just turned 18,the social worker who came out to do an assessment wrote down that my parents did everything for me, and she never got back in contact to say the result.
so some months later,i was in special college and my tutor who had found out about my mums alcoholism & the abuse i suffered at home got the social services involved and the learning disability team came out again and did an asessment,24 hours later i was appointed a social worker,a SALT as my severe speech and language issues had been left neglected and found a placement in a learning disability institution.

zachary,supported living isnt just for people [such as myself] who constant physical and verbal support with personal care,cooking,constant monitoring etc,its also for people who have lower needs-who dont need a staff with them all the time.
for example i am living in a supported living facility,there are 12 flats and every person has different support needs,i have constant care,my next door neighbour has visits from the support staff every so often but she also has the support of nurses who go in ocasionally to help transfer her from her wheel chair to her bed or chair or to clean her.
other service users have very little support and just get ocasional visits from the support staff,they tend to go to the recreational area and watch tv with other service users who live there.

i do not recommend moving in with other people [a shared property] if you are ever offered one-ive done it since 18 years old and have carried along the label of being highly challenging and told i was a burden on others because i like control of the environment and i dont see other people as seperate/different to me.
shared homes are a nightmare for autistic people who need to have more control of their environment and less interuption from other people,its best off to have your own place in a supportive facility if you need support.

as for the social worker,i recommend asking for another community care assessment stating the last social worker never took you seriously and did not understand your needs.
best of luck with the next one,hopefully you will get someone nice.