Difficult to say, but here goes!

[Suzanne]

I feel so ashamed, that as an adult, I can not go out about ON MY OWN. I feel like a lost child and it especially happens when I am around ones I know, but feel uncomfortable around.

I also feel incredibly lonely with being the only one I know, who does not have a license. It truly embarrasses me.

 

[tree]

A driver's license, you mean?

 

[Neonatal RRT]

Is this a social anxiety thing?

I do feel a bit awkward and alone whenever I go by myself anywhere. I've been to several medical conferences and must force myself to socialize with people I've never met before. It's a strange feeling. Never comfortable. Go to a restaurant, "Table for one." I feel so self-conscious, as if people are looking at me and judging, and I have to force myself to think that they aren't looking at me, at all.

Do you have access to a taxi, Uber, or ride share service?

 

[WhitewaterWoman]

I go lots of places alone and in general prefer it.

If you want to desensitize yourself to the fear of going out alone, start with very tiny goals, like, stand on the front porch for 5 minutes. Progress gradually to walking out the door to the street. Around the block, etc.

If it is driving, just get in the car and sit. When you’re comfortable with that, drive around the block. You get the idea.

Or you can just get comfortable staying home. That’s not necessarily a bad option.

 

[Angular Chap]

I also have issues going places by myself. Anything other than going to a doctor or dentist, I usually need a family member, friend or neighbour to come along for a bit of support and help me find the right place and do things correctly and smoothly so I don’t get lost.

I also don’t have a license, just a provisional one that anyone can get. I only have it for ID.

You’re right, it is difficult to say at first. But now you’ve had the courage to say it, hopefully it will get easier to talk about. You’ve climbed over a personal hurdle by mentioning it.

 

[Masked Man]

It gets easier to go out alone if you keep doing it. Eventually you get used to it. It also helps to remember that no one is looking at you and paying attention to you. Most people are too wrapped up in their own lives to even think about anyone else.

 

[grommet]

I feel so ashamed, that as an adult, I can not go out about ON MY OWN. I feel like a lost child and it especially happens when I am around ones I know, but feel uncomfortable around.

I also feel incredibly lonely with being the only one I know, who does not have a license. It truly embarrasses me.

I am like a child. I am confused when I go out, everything is confusing. My ex used to translate for me. She would explain what people were saying. I stay home now unless I have to go out. It is lonely. My friend is on a cruise right now with another friend. It is so easy for him, he can go all over the world. I am very uncomfortable in my own neighborhood. I feel lost pretty quickly outside of it and I cannot imagine renting a car or hotel room. I get confused easily and might not realize I signed up for a hotel room for one week when I wanted one night. No matter how much prepare I cannot manage things like that.

I stay home, I live alone. I am lonely but I cannot understand people. I am not saying they are doing anything wrong. I am saying I actually cannot understand them, their expressions when they talk, their facial expressions, their tones which I think mean a lot and can change the meaning to the opposite of what they said, they can be that important. I do not know when someone is tricking me, that scares me. Kids taught me that when I was a kid. They only had to talk normally with a normal expression and I believed what they told me. then they would laugh out loud in front of everyone watching and call me names for believing them. They seemed to enjoy doing that. It happened a lotted for years. I do not understand the trick. It just felt bad, not like I was playing with them.

Maybe we are all different and you are really good at some things but noticing what you cannot do and thinking you are really bad. Maybe I do that without knowing.

 

[SusanLR]

Doing things on my own was never comfortable.
It became really bad when I started having panic attacks at age 13.
I became agoraphobic and home -schooled high school.
Thankfully, my parents accepted this, and I stayed at home with them most of my life.
I never wanted to drive alone especially.

This never made me miserable. I just made my own world that I found comforting and always stayed busy.
I did go to university of medical arts, got a degree and became a pharmacist.
Also started dating and going out some by age 23.

I wish I had done the little step by step method though and maybe I would have gotten used to doing things alone before the inevitable happened. Parents died leaving no other family or close friends.
Sink or swim isn't an easy way to start doing things alone.
But I did gradually get used to it. I still don't like driving very far from home alone though.

Start the baby steps now is my advice. You'll be glad you did later.

 

[Suzanne]

I am like a child. I am confused when I go out, everything is confusing. My ex used to translate for me. She would explain what people were saying. I stay home now unless I have to go out. It is lonely. My friend is on a cruise right now with another friend. It is so easy for him, he can go all over the world. I am very uncomfortable in my own neighborhood. I feel lost pretty quickly outside of it and I cannot imagine renting a car or hotel room. I get confused easily and might not realize I signed up for a hotel room for one week when I wanted one night. No matter how much prepare I cannot manage things like that.

I stay home, I live alone. I am lonely but I cannot understand people. I am not saying they are doing anything wrong. I am saying I actually cannot understand them, their expressions when they talk, their facial expressions, their tones which I think mean a lot and can change the meaning to the opposite of what they said, they can be that important. I do not know when someone is tricking me, that scares me. Kids taught me that when I was a kid. They only had to talk normally with a normal expression and I believed what they told me. then they would laugh out loud in front of everyone watching and call me names for believing them. They seemed to enjoy doing that. It happened a lotted for years. I do not understand the trick. It just felt bad, not like I was playing with them.

Maybe we are all different and you are really good at some things but noticing what you cannot do and thinking you are really bad. Maybe I do that without knowing.

I cannot say, I am sad for you, because in fact, it is a great comfort to me that I am not alone in this.

In truth, I would fair better in my birth country, but due to where I live, it is just so hard for me, because even familiar areas, are foreign to me.

Just seen a dr and waiting in that room, even though my husband was with me, was torture.

 

[Suzanne]

A driver's license, you mean?

Oops, yes. I can actually drive an automatic and do not basics of manual, but due to not being able to multitask, automatic is best and did take a few free lessons and was told I had the ability to be a good driver. But, the type of car available is way too expensive.

 

[Suzanne]

Is this a social anxiety thing?

I do feel a bit awkward and alone whenever I go by myself anywhere. I've been to several medical conferences and must force myself to socialize with people I've never met before. It's a strange feeling. Never comfortable. Go to a restaurant, "Table for one." I feel so self-conscious, as if people are looking at me and judging, and I have to force myself to think that they aren't looking at me, at all.

Do you have access to a taxi, Uber, or ride share service?

I guess it is social anxiety. But I discovered it is also agoraphobia.

 

[Suzanne]

I go lots of places alone and in general prefer it.

If you want to desensitize yourself to the fear of going out alone, start with very tiny goals, like, stand on the front porch for 5 minutes. Progress gradually to walking out the door to the street. Around the block, etc.

If it is driving, just get in the car and sit. When you’re comfortable with that, drive around the block. You get the idea.

Or you can just get comfortable staying home. That’s not necessarily a bad option.

Unable to even go as far as those goals. I used to try and push myself and was utterly miserable.

 

[Aspychata]

I think when you realize that other people can feel strange going out, it isn't so bad. l like going out if l don't need to socialize, as l really get exasperated with most people for a variety of reasons which may not even be their fault. My uncomfortable feeling is due to PTSD, sensory issues, entitled aggressive men in the southern state l live in. Try breaking down what exactly makes you feel uncomfortable. If it's because you feel lost, then just ask questions about what you need, and most people will help you with info needed. Like where is this office, who is in charge of hospital billing, how do l apply for this benefit? l had to register my divorce in another state, and the court employee actually added a paragraph to my affidavit to make it about 80% official, (thank you ladies).

 

[NB79]

My city is small and i know it well, but if i had to drive in the capital i don't know if could do it, i am bad at remembering streets etc, i could get lost easily in a big city that i don't know well. Ok, there is GPS now but.

 

[AprilR]

I think i also have the problem of going places alone, especially open markets.

It is a mixture of social anxiety/fear of getting scammed and a fear of crowded places.