Hey All,
I am a 23 year old guy that is very high functioning autism. I was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome back when I was a kid. I was just wondering, do any of you fellow autistic people tend to like to target / seek out someone specific to want to be friends with at all?
Because most of my friendships came by me literally seeking out someone and basically starting conversations and trying to befriend them. Very often, they could be people that I did not even know or have personally met before but maybe just heard their names through mutual friends. Or sometimes people I met once or twice but do not see them on a daily basis. It's often the vibe, emotional energy, and the position they are in that makes me want to be friends with them.
I often have the idea like this: "I am not looking for friends. I just want to be friends with this specific person." And again it could sometimes be someone that I have never even met, but maybe heard mutual friends talk about him/her and then kind of stalked them on social media a little bit to learn more about them and see whether they'd be a good fit for me or not. I might even ask mutual friends around about him/her and ask if they could see me and him/her being friends.
Here is an example:
A few years ago, during my junior year of college, I was hanging out in my dorms living room with many other people. We were being extremely loud and there were people on the floor below us that were trying to sleep and couldn't. The 4 RAs on my dorm were having a talk because the RAs on the floor below us were complaining about people trying to sleep and we were making a lot of noise. I overheard their conversation and of them mentioned the names, Holly & Hannah (not their real names but I am just using those names for the scenario). I jumped into the conversation and asked who Holly & Hannah were. They told me they were the RAs downstairs. I have never met them before, but immediately took an interest in them and thought to myself: "Hmm, maybe Holly & Hannah would be a good fit for me to pursue friendships with." Then I started asking around about Holly & Hannah, and what they were like. The RAs on my dorm found it so weird and couldn't understand why I was so curious about them.
About a week later, I went downstairs and sought out Holly & Hannah, and then started to talk to them. Within a few weeks, we became friends and I really loved them so much. They are both still my friends til this day. It's not like I shared any life experiences with them at all, but just intentionally sought them out to want to befriend them, without even knowing who they are. The RAs on my floor basically told me that what I did was super weird and they couldn't believe how well it even worked.
How weird is this? Is this actually an autistic thing, or is that just my personality? Because I haven't heard of hardly anyone doing things like this, even other autistic people I know.
I am a 23 year old guy that is very high functioning autism. I was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome back when I was a kid. I was just wondering, do any of you fellow autistic people tend to like to target / seek out someone specific to want to be friends with at all?
Because most of my friendships came by me literally seeking out someone and basically starting conversations and trying to befriend them. Very often, they could be people that I did not even know or have personally met before but maybe just heard their names through mutual friends. Or sometimes people I met once or twice but do not see them on a daily basis. It's often the vibe, emotional energy, and the position they are in that makes me want to be friends with them.
I often have the idea like this: "I am not looking for friends. I just want to be friends with this specific person." And again it could sometimes be someone that I have never even met, but maybe heard mutual friends talk about him/her and then kind of stalked them on social media a little bit to learn more about them and see whether they'd be a good fit for me or not. I might even ask mutual friends around about him/her and ask if they could see me and him/her being friends.
Here is an example:
A few years ago, during my junior year of college, I was hanging out in my dorms living room with many other people. We were being extremely loud and there were people on the floor below us that were trying to sleep and couldn't. The 4 RAs on my dorm were having a talk because the RAs on the floor below us were complaining about people trying to sleep and we were making a lot of noise. I overheard their conversation and of them mentioned the names, Holly & Hannah (not their real names but I am just using those names for the scenario). I jumped into the conversation and asked who Holly & Hannah were. They told me they were the RAs downstairs. I have never met them before, but immediately took an interest in them and thought to myself: "Hmm, maybe Holly & Hannah would be a good fit for me to pursue friendships with." Then I started asking around about Holly & Hannah, and what they were like. The RAs on my dorm found it so weird and couldn't understand why I was so curious about them.
About a week later, I went downstairs and sought out Holly & Hannah, and then started to talk to them. Within a few weeks, we became friends and I really loved them so much. They are both still my friends til this day. It's not like I shared any life experiences with them at all, but just intentionally sought them out to want to befriend them, without even knowing who they are. The RAs on my floor basically told me that what I did was super weird and they couldn't believe how well it even worked.
How weird is this? Is this actually an autistic thing, or is that just my personality? Because I haven't heard of hardly anyone doing things like this, even other autistic people I know.
