Do people enjoy riding public transit?

[Sherlock77]

Or at least get used to it/normalize it, if that is their only way of getting around

More a curiosity question related to a current situation, a few months back I worked a warehouse temp job with weird bus access, one of my co-workers was an older man had actually never owned a car and/or had a license... Knowing which neighbourhood he lived in I offered him a ride (it was slightly out of the way, but not that bad), he accepted my offer one day and then never seemed to want a ride again...

Where I'm working another short term job contract right now, I discovered by simple conversation that a female co-worker moved in literally one house away from me one month ago... To be clear she volunteered which street it was, it's not a long street... Maybe I was too quick but my first reaction was to say I lived on the same street (for 19 years actually)... To be a gentleman I put out the offer of a ride to work, as she takes the bus, I've followed up a couple of times with the offer and she politely declines, I won't bring it up again but the offer is there...

One thing I've thought of, I'm a 50 year old male, and she is probably half my age, we are on good terms at work though but perhaps there is a trust issue

Or maybe too, some people don't mind taking the bus that much, I've read articles about how some young people don't mind a long bus ride because they have their smart phones, or perhaps in the rare case a book they enjoy reading

Me? I've driven for years, rarely take public transit, in particular for a work commute, depending on where I have worked taking the bus requires getting up much earlier plus getting home much later compared to driving, I do walk lots but admittedly I drive to most places I go even on weekends, partially (mostly) because I can get a lot more done compared to taking public transit and the wait times

But then maybe... People who don't drive just simply get used to life being less convenient, or don't even see it that way (maybe some of you feel that way)

I would go stir crazy relying on the bus for everything

 

[Forest Cat]

I have driven cars for so long that it's a habbit, I prefer cars. The place where I live now is more difficult without a car, I'm in the countryside. There is a bus route here but it would take me much more time because to get home I would have to wait for a bus for hours.

 

[Sherlock77]

I have driven cars for so long that it's a habbit, I prefer cars. The place where I live now is more difficult without a car, I'm in the countryside. There is a bus route here but it would take me much more time because to get home I would have to wait for a bus for hours.

Maybe a slight over statement on my part, but living in a big city I know people who choose for various reasons to forego a car, and when your life involves public transit (perhaps cycling), it just becomes part of how you live life...

And, yes, I do know how much it costs to maintain a vehicle, I still choose to to own a car...

 

[Luca]

I absolutely hate public transportation and avoid it like the plague. Especially now.
I forced myself to start driving again for this reason.

The only public transit I can handle is commuter trains and ferries. I hate subway trains and buses. They’re often filthy and attract crime.

 

[VictorR]

Apologies in advance for bluntness. My response draws from my experiences, and this topic is kind of a sensitive one for me.

I'd glad to hear that you've stopped offering rides to that colleague as more than twice would be pushy and possibly scare them away from your existing work relationship.

The issue with offering any favor is the feeling of needing to reciprocate, even when the favor is paid for (e.g. they pay you what they otherwise would have paid for bus fare).

To start, since it's someone you know, you have to engage in some pleasantries beyond the usual courtesy thank you that one would say when getting off a bus. So they'll have to greet you, and perhaps engage in some small talk. As you've noted, there is a power imbalance in your situation which does put them in a vulnerable position.

But not everyone wants to talk, or not all the time. Or maybe some days you want to talk, but not other days. Or on one day you want to talk about a certain topic, but not on another day. So the socializing aspect can be challenging for both.

I once knew an guy who swore that driving was a right, and that he'd pretty much commit seppuku if he'd have to take public transit, despite the fact that his work was right beside a light rail station. Well, the times his ride was in the repair shop, he would take the train, and he didn't die from cooties or anything else. I think for him, he just really valued being alone, and in control, to have freedom and not constrained by a schedule. (Not that it really matters, but he's on the spectrum)

But just as driving gives one the sense of freedom and independence, taking public transit over a ride agreement also offers freedom and independence. When getting a ride, you're locked in that commitment for the duration. You're going to and from work for however many days per week at set times. Unless you're friends with them, you can't really (or at least don't feel like you can) ask for a stop or detour to pick up groceries, or check our that new store or restaurant that just opened. And when you're on the bus, you can do your own thing - whether that be listening to music, playing a game on your phone, reading a book, looking out the window, or maybe a random interaction with a fellow passenger. You don't need to feel obligated to chat to your driver/colleague.

And so the very same reasons that one may prefer to drive may be the same ones that lead one to prefer not being in a ride / carpool situation.

I hope this might be insightful.

 

[Stuttermabolur]

Growing up, I used to take two buses to school, and when I was on exchange, I also took two trams to the high school I was attending. In both cases, the total trip took about an hour. I also used the bus a lot when I moved countries with my mother and we didn't have a car. Nowadays, I much prefer cycling to driving, so despite having access to a car, I find cycling more enjoyable, it's healthier and less expensive, so it just makes sense to me (though I also live in a country with sidewalks and bicycle paths).

To me, public transport gives me an opportunity to just zone out and read or listen to music or podcasts. If anything, I would have thought people on the spectrum enjoyed public transport even more than driving. To me, driving is stressful as I need to be aware of my surrounding and anything could go wrong at a moment's notice. I don't find the act of driving particularly fun or enjoyable like some people. In contrast, taking public transport is a relaxing activity where no-one asks anything of me and I can be in my own little world. I don't mind about the time it takes if I can spend it doing something I enjoy. It's quite expensive in my country though, so I'll always cycle instead if I have the option.

It might depend on an individual country's public transit though. Buses are generally not crammed here, you don't need to speak to a bus driver (the "thank the bus driver" meme seemed positively demented to us) and people are very antisocial, so you never get unsolicited conversations, especially if you have something in your ears or are reading.

 

[Metalhead]

I do not mind the bus route that takes me into the larger nearby city. That is a quiet ride. But the bus I have to take to get to the office once I get downtown is usually packed like sardines and very loud, and I dislike that.

 

[Sherlock77]

Apologies in advance for bluntness. My response draws from my experiences, and this topic is kind of a sensitive one for me.

I'd glad to hear that you've stopped offering rides to that colleague as more than twice would be pushy and possibly scare them away from your existing work relationship.

The issue with offering any favor is the feeling of needing to reciprocate, even when the favor is paid for (e.g. they pay you what they otherwise would have paid for bus fare).

To start, since it's someone you know, you have to engage in some pleasantries beyond the usual courtesy thank you that one would say when getting off a bus. So they'll have to greet you, and perhaps engage in some small talk. As you've noted, there is a power imbalance in your situation which does put them in a vulnerable position.

But not everyone wants to talk, or not all the time. Or maybe some days you want to talk, but not other days. Or on one day you want to talk about a certain topic, but not on another day. So the socializing aspect can be challenging for both.

I once knew an guy who swore that driving was a right, and that he'd pretty much commit seppuku if he'd have to take public transit, despite the fact that his work was right beside a light rail station. Well, the times his ride was in the repair shop, he would take the train, and he didn't die from cooties or anything else. I think for him, he just really valued being alone, and in control, to have freedom and not constrained by a schedule. (Not that it really matters, but he's on the spectrum)

But just as driving gives one the sense of freedom and independence, taking public transit over a ride agreement also offers freedom and independence. When getting a ride, you're locked in that commitment for the duration. You're going to and from work for however many days per week at set times. Unless you're friends with them, you can't really (or at least don't feel like you can) ask for a stop or detour to pick up groceries, or check our that new store or restaurant that just opened. And when you're on the bus, you can do your own thing - whether that be listening to music, playing a game on your phone, reading a book, looking out the window, or maybe a random interaction with a fellow passenger. You don't need to feel obligated to chat to your driver/colleague.

And so the very same reasons that one may prefer to drive may be the same ones that lead one to prefer not being in a ride / carpool situation.

I hope this might be insightful.

I'm no dummy (re: my co-worker), and agree with everything... I simply know enough non-drivers to know there are other perspectives

 

[Sherlock77]

Growing up, I used to take two buses to school, and when I was on exchange, I also took two trams to the high school I was attending. In both cases, the total trip took about an hour. I also used the bus a lot when I moved countries with my mother and we didn't have a car. Nowadays, I much prefer cycling to driving, so despite having access to a car, I find cycling more enjoyable, it's healthier and less expensive, so it just makes sense to me (though I also live in a country with sidewalks and bicycle paths).

To me, public transport gives me an opportunity to just zone out and read or listen to music or podcasts. If anything, I would have thought people on the spectrum enjoyed public transport even more than driving. To me, driving is stressful as I need to be aware of my surrounding and anything could go wrong at a moment's notice. I don't find the act of driving particularly fun or enjoyable like some people. In contrast, taking public transport is a relaxing activity where no-one asks anything of me and I can be in my own little world. I don't mind about the time it takes if I can spend it doing something I enjoy. It's quite expensive in my country though, so I'll always cycle instead if I have the option.

It might depend on an individual country's public transit though. Buses are generally not crammed here, you don't need to speak to a bus driver (the "thank the bus driver" meme seemed positively demented to us) and people are very antisocial, so you never get unsolicited conversations, especially if you have something in your ears or are reading.

I love driving! My city commute to my current job doesn't involve any significant traffic jams at all... Heck, I find ways to get to and from work that avoid freeways (where possible), and driving on quieter roads... Why drive? So I can get home sooner, and possibly do other things with the time I saved, there are events/things I would never get to if I didn't drive, it would take too long...

 

[Gerald Wilgus]

When convenient I use public transit in cities. Whether it is the free mall bus in Denver or the subways in NYC or Washington DC or London, I like to sample public transit when I travel. Last April I used the Skytrain, the Subway, and Tuk Tuks in Bangkok.

I used to live in a town NW of Chicago and a mile from the CTA station and the engineering office I worked in abutted Union Station. So, once I got into Union Station I walked through it into the lobby where I worked and took the elevator to the 43rd floor.

 

[Calrid]

Not really I find it uncomfortable, but that said it's better than learning how to drive. Christ, I would never own a car. IT sounds like freedom but really it's just a death knell.

 

[Sherlock77]

When convenient I use public transit in cities. Whether it is the free mall bus in Denver or the subways in NYC or Washington DC or London, I like to sample public transit when I travel. Last April I used the Skytrain, the Subway, and Tuk Tuks in Bangkok.

I used to live in a town NW of Chicago and a mile from the CTA station and the engineering office I worked in abutted Union Station. So, once I got into Union Station I walked through it into the lobby where I worked and took the elevator to the 43rd floor.

When I've traveled to large cities I don't bother with a car rental, unless planning a trip out of the city

 

[Sherlock77]

Not really I find it uncomfortable, but that said it's better than learning how to drive. Christ, I would never own a car. IT sounds like freedom but really it's just a death knell.

But time factor... But I do understand you... Speaking for myself, I just wouldn't get much accomplished on transit...

 

[Aspychata]

I rode the LA busses a bit because you see the local flavor, however woman were followed off busses and robbed or raped or both. So this was worrisome. I also met a older lady in my complex that met a younger couple on the bus, they followed her to her apartment unbeknownst to her. Asked for water, once inside they robbed her after knocking her out. So my riding public transit is no longer at the top of ways to get places.

 

[Bolletje]

I can’t drive because I get overwhelmed by all the stimuli, so I walk, cycle or use public transport. Buses are fine for me for short distances. Public transport buses here don’t have bathrooms though. Since I have IBS, that’s not a good combo. I’ve once had to beg a bus driver to pull over so I could have a particularly violent roadside bowel movement with half the bus as an audience. Not a great look, especially since there were coworkers on board too.

I prefer taking the train because there’s bathrooms in there. They’re usually dirty and smelly and out of toilet paper, but knowing I have safety options helps. I try to avoid long train rides and traveling at rush hour. My country often has trains packed full of people, especially during rush hour. And due to chronic staff shortages and technical issues, trains are often not riding on parts of their trajectory. But when all the stars align, public transport is fine

 

[Judge]

Bay Area Rapid Transit (BART) was never cheap, but it's an efficient way to get in and around San Francisco, which isn't always a vehicle-friendly place. I commuted from the East Bay to downtown San Francisco for about ten years.
Can't imagine trying to drive there without a personal parking space waiting for me.

But would I prefer public transportation in general ? Hellno.

 

[Fino]

I took a bus once, got lost, and there were no more buses, so I had to walk for 1-2 hours late at night. I'm afraid of the dark, strangers, animals, and most other things so it wasn't so great.

 

[Luca]

Jeez, didn’t mean for my reply in this thread to sound so blunt!

I have had very scary experiences on public transportation and that’s why I reacted like that. The buses and trains in the cities here are not that safe. People are often robbed or get in fights. I have had drunk aggressive people make me really uncomfortable, or been approached by middle aged men who definitely didn’t have good intentions.

So I prefer to drive because public transportation makes me really nervous.
Obviously driving makes me nervous too though, because getting pulled over could pose a very real danger to me.

 

[Storm Hess]

I hate public transit. I get claustrophobic and I don't like being around groups of people...mostly people bumping into me...I do not like that.

 

[SusanLR]

I have never used public transit due to learning schedules, timing, and being
confined in an area with people all around. Social anxiety, yes.

Driving also gives me anxiety. It also gives freedom and no crowds.
I would not like someone in the car with me either except for a close household
member.

I also drive very cautiously because I do not want confrontation with being
pulled over due to disability reasons that could create problems.
No easy way out.
A chauffeur? If I had that kind of money.