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Do you feel socially exhausted?

Aspie_With_Attitude

Aspie_With_Attitude

Well-Known Member
V.I.P Member

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A few weeks ago I had premiered this video upload onto my channel explaining "Social Exhaustion" reading off from this image that I have provided just in case if watching my videos isn't your thing. At least in my YouTube content I explain how I feel about being socially exhausted and want the time to be able to zone out so I can recharge only if this gets too much for me.
 
Yes, absolutely I do! Back before my depression got really bad I could cope better to a point, but these days it's like I'm running on fumes. The annoying part is that people keep trying to push me into social situations as it will make me "feel better".

The thing I dislike about it the most is that I feel so exhausted by masking during the social event that I'm still exhausted the next day and I try to mask that but it's a losing battle.

It's like trying to cure an allergy to peanuts by exposing someone to increasing numbers of peanuts.

When I was younger I wouldn't go on nights out for most of the year, then I'd have a little flurry of social activity (often because I'd been pushed into it) before retreating back to solitude for a while. I'd only really spend time with one friend. That was enough for me. I liked my bedroom, with my cat, my computer, my guitar and my music. Being there was where I was happy. Even despite all the chaos my mother used to cause at home.
 
MildredHubble said:
I'd only really spend time with one friend. That was enough for me.
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I had one friend visit today. It was nice at first, then I was done. He wasn't yet. I can't quite cross the line of telling someone "Ok, time for you to leave". Basically went full passive and only responded to things he said. I didn't contribute any more. I finally said I needed water and did he need some. Fortunately he decided it was time to go.
 
Jumpinbare said:
I had one friend visit today. It was nice at first, then I was done. He wasn't yet. I can't quite cross the line of telling someone "Ok, time for you to leave". Basically went full passive and only responded to things he said. I didn't contribute any more. I finally said I needed water and did he need some. Fortunately he decided it was time to go.
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I can't shoo people out either when I've reached my limit. I feel bad since they are only being friendly and it seems rude to start trying to usher them to the door.

I've got two appointments with doctors etc next week. I kinda wish I could reschedule, but fortunately one will be brief, but will involve being stuck with needles for blood tests so while brief I will have to deal with my phobia lol!

It sounds like one of those dilemma thought experiments, like "Would you rather spend an hour at home with a stranger, or 10 minutes in an office with a person you've met before, but they are going to stick sharp pointy things in your arm?"

I really can't figure out which one I'd choose :smilecat:
 
Socializing is tiring because people don't act civilized anymore. Pushing boundaries, delivering criticism on how l live my life, and assumptions by complete strangers who know absolutely nothing about me. So, socializing is no longer for me.
 
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I feel it alot both at home and when finished at work,I used to be able to manage my exhaustion amd shutdowns well but as my daughter as asd and suspected adhd my only release is in sleep or walking,I use my headphones alot as music is my best coping mechanisms but sometimes is not enough and I just need to go into full reboot which is hard on those around me but necessary
 
MildredHubble said:
I can't shoo people out either when I've reached my limit. I feel bad since they are only being friendly and it seems rude to start trying to usher them to the door.
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To me it is easy to say to people that "I am now getting tired and I need to rest, it was nice that you visited..." Most of them already know that I am like that. (It also helps that I don't have friends that I want to keep)

It is my close family, especially my old mother (I am a caretaker for her, so I now live in same apartment with her), who are a problem: They are always around, and I just can't keep asking them to shut up and get out all the time, so I just have to just tolerate them occasionally longer than I'd like.

MildredHubble said:
It sounds like one of those dilemma thought experiments, like "Would you rather spend an hour at home with a stranger, or 10 minutes in an office with a person you've met before, but they are going to stick sharp pointy things in your arm?"
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I hardly let any friends to my place, not to mention strangers :)
 
Like, all the time XD. I work at a highschool so I pretty much cannot avoid to socialize. On top of that, outside of maybe 1 hours a week (seperated over multiple moments) I`m never at home alone. My kids are basically always there when I am.
We decided to do things like this so my children do not need to go to daycare, which we have good reasons for. And I`m glad we can do it that way. But it is slowly becoming harder. If it wasn`t for the many holidays you get when working on a school I would not last another year. Those are the 'recharge' weeks.
I`m not a jealous by any means. But the only time I do get jealous is when people say they either work only a couple of hours, stay at home parents or retired people. Atleast I can look forward to being part of one of those groups in roughly 34-38 years XD
 
Aspie_With_Attitude said:

View attachment 123874

A few weeks ago I had premiered this video upload onto my channel explaining "Social Exhaustion" reading off from this image that I have provided just in case if watching my videos isn't your thing. At least in my YouTube content I explain how I feel about being socially exhausted and want the time to be able to zone out so I can recharge only if this gets too much for me.
Click to expand...

Attempting to be sociable is such a painful endeavor for me. It seems as if everyone finds fault with how I do it, and rather than tell me what I did wrong, they will simply swivel around, turn their back on me, and walk away. It's said that socialization is an energy sink for introverts. I think with me, it takes so much energy that people are always perturbed by how little I'm trying, or by how excessively hard I'm forced to try, and so, of course, the right amount basically doesn't exist, and you can never get it right. Nobody wants to be around me.
 
Socializing in person takes up a lot of spoons for me. Even when it's people I'm comfortable with. Particularly if it's 3 or more people.
 
Where did the "spoons" thing come from? I realize it refers to energy/resources/motivation, but why spoons?
 
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