Do you get lonely?

[Firnafth]

Do you get lonely? Why? How do you cope?


I've been feeling a lot of loneliness in the past year. This is partially because there is nobody I am really close to in my city at all. It is also because I have these interests in biology, and there is nobody to share them with here because of the size and focus of the biology department I am in. Even other things I want to talk about I just know I won't ever get into a real conversation with people about. I like animated films and have been analyzing them lately - what style is the animation, what did the animators pay most attention to, how the plotlines are different/similar with each other, etc. Seriously, who is going to talk about this with me, especially in a way which improves my understanding?

I've been coping by accepting my loneliness and trying not to feel too bad about it. I have also been watching a lot of movies, just in tidbits in the evenings. It's as if hearing people's voices and observing the characters makes me feel better, and I can also watch/analyze the movies while I'm at it.

 

[Kodak]

I do get lonely, quite lonely especially when I see other people that are able and accepted and have a friend or more to talk to about things.
I wish that there was someone that I could talk to about my own interests in a depth that may broaden my own understanding and knowledge...

I do try to cope with it but the feelings of loneliness further deepens depressive feelings...

 

[juffur]

I also get very lonely. I have no friends to talk with, and I've been in college for 5 years now. It would be nice to have a friend. I don't know how to cope with it. I think it's gotten worse over the years.

 

[Heritor]

I do get very lonely, but truth be told, I am not lacking in friends in the slightest. I have many friends I chat with from another forum, many friends from my old job I chat with, many friends from World of Warcraft I chat with, and more still I hang out with offline. The reason I feel lonely is because I am so different from them all. I don't have a friend I can say anything to who understands. My thoughts get very farfetched and so I have to hold back when I talk to people. It's like being a cat who has a hundred dog friends. Sure, they are kind to me, listen to me, help me and so on, but because I am nothing like them, my connection with them is altered for precautions. If I said everything I felt and go through, I would disturb a great many people. Don't get me wrong. I love my friends and appreciate all they do. Still, I always have this wall up between us that I have yet been able to take down all the way. I even know an aspie offline, but she is still very different from me.

In my welcoming thread, I mentioned that I usually refrain when I talk. There are some people who I did open up more to, but they didn't understand. I have held a few unrestricted chats, but the results were dissapointing. So I am not physically lonely. I am emotionally lonely. I have not had an issue with meeting new people. I have a bubbly personality and am not shy in the slightest. I walk up to anyone and start chatting away, which is why I know so many people. Nonetheless, I have yet tried seeing eye-to-eye with someone succesfully. I have come closer to some than to others, but I've not been fully understood yet. So I am surrounded by those who care, but am still, alone.

 

[spacecadetcolin]

I've been all over the map as far as friends are concerned, good ones, bad ones, lots of friends and no friends. yet i find loneliness has little correlation with the amount of friends or how often you talk or hang out with people. in fact some of my most lonely moments were spent in the company of some of my closest friends. we need to be told we are worth something, we need our thoughts and expressions to be heard and received positively so that we know that we're worth something or for the soul reason of expression its self (which is actually the reason i joined this forum). i guess i don't need any one to tell me I'm worth something or that my thoughts and ideas have value but its a lot easier to to convince my self that i have value if i can connect with another person on some deeper level then just a stock dialog kind of conversation.

i think most people are lonely. the other day i was having a heart to heart with one of my room mates who is NT and he told me that he was secretly lonely. i was a little surprised. it makes sense though, i think people for the most part are so caught up in there own life and there own perceptions that they don't really think about much else let alone understanding another persons ideas or point of view. its very hard to make that connection, its actually been very frightening and nerve wrackingin my experience. i guess there's not really much else to do but keep at it, keep searching for that light at the end of the tunnel even if its just a small glimpse of understanding.