does anyone have a fear of being recorded in public and going viral?

[selena]

I'm conflict-avoidant, and yesterday decided to mix things up and talk to customer service about getting a refund instead of just sucking it up.

I didn't overplan, and things went south pretty fast as I kept telling myself not to meekly say "ok" and back away like I normally would've done.

I don't know how loud I was, but I definitely was raising my voice. Now I'm convinced someone has a recording of me and it's a matter of time before I become the next "Karen."

 

[Judge]

Good point in this day and age. You screw up big-time and someone is there with their cellphone/camera to memorialize it at your expense. Something I witnessed being in a Walmart waiting in line for the checker. Heard someone raise their voice in the customer service area and sure enough, others were videoing it.

Most of my life for whatever reasons I have always tried to avoid being photographed by perfect strangers. Whether by happenstance or not. I guess now in my old age I don't really give a damn any more. Go figure. But on video that goes viral?

Like I said, "Good point!" Where the ultimate intent is probably just "Schadenfreude". For the public to delight over the misfortune of others. Much like ancient Rome's Coliseum.

 

[Bolletje]

I understand the worry. But I would say it’s best not to worry about things you can’t control. If people want to film you, they will. But most people will not want to record you doing things.

And if they were to film you, unless you act really outrageous or strange, any video of you raising your voice is probably not going to be “interesting” enough to go viral. Someone raising their voice at customer service is an everyday occurrence we can all see if we go to a store, so it’s not the type of material to go viral.

 

[Slim Jim]

I don't know if this counts, but I did appear on Dr Phil.

They contacted me, if I wanted to appear. Because I'm special.

Those Jokers, they tricked me though. They were two-face. It was dastardly plot to sabotage my valiant efforts and embarrass me in public. But it didn't work.

I just regret my secret identity was exposed. I should have Masked more. I went through a dark knight of the soul for many months after it aired.

But no, I have no fear of it going viral. I'm perfectly normal.

Also when I'm not busy, I dress up as certain Rockstar too. (I think you can guess.) Like I said, I'm perfectly normal.

 

[Darkkin]

To chime in on the flipside of this because working retail a lot of people make the assumption you can't get a better job, are lazy, unskilled, or stupid. Many people treat employees like they are sub-human and thusly are directly responsible for the source of the inconvenience.

The grandma working to suppliment her social security didn't set the prices, the coupon policies, the return policies etc. Neither did the cashier working to pay their way through college, or the dad working to pay for groceries.

These are the people on the other side of the counter who have to deal with the 'Karens' when a discount and a coupon won't stack because of store policy, or the cashier refused to do a return on an item with no receipt and no way to cross reference the transaction record.

These are the people who wonder if they will still have a job after a Karen encounter because of the customer is always right entitlement mindset.

Worry about people filming, read your store's return policy? Hang onto receipts. Email option for a receipt? Utilize it.

Remember that the staff trying to help are not responsible for the situation and working on the other side of the counter probably empathise with you more than you could ever know.

There are steps that we, as consumers, can do to make things like returns simple and relatively painless.

Having your receipt or a secondary source of look up e.g. (store card (membership) or credit/debit card), ready to go will save you lightyears of headaches and frustration.

The people who film and post this kind of stuff only exacerbate the problem. It doesn't help anyone and only encourages the outrageous behaviour.

 

[selena]

I understand the worry. But I would say it’s best not to worry about things you can’t control. If people want to film you, they will. But most people will not want to record you doing things.

And if they were to film you, unless you act really outrageous or strange, any video of you raising your voice is probably not going to be “interesting” enough to go viral. Someone raising their voice at customer service is an everyday occurrence we can all see if we go to a store, so it’s not the type of material to go viral.

Thanks for this. I know I probably just feel more self-conscious than most people because I very rarely assert myself so that, even if I wasn't doing anything extraordinary, it felt unusual by my standards and I worry I was being unnecessarily rude.

 

[Slim Jim]

Yes, In my spare time, I try to fight crime. My superhero exploits technically may have went viral. I have since separated with my ex. I'm still looking for my Catwoman. Somebody who can accept the real me.

More from my Episode.

BTW this is blatant character assassination piece. I did not lose the fight. It was a draw. I was knocked out briefly, but I recovered. I then defeated him with my Batarang and grappling hook.

 

[selena]

To chime in on the flipside of this because working retail a lot of people make the assumption you can't get a better job, are lazy, unskilled, or stupid. Many people treat employees like they are sub-human and thusly are directly responsible for the source of the inconvenience.

The grandma working to suppliment her social security didn't set the prices, the coupon policies, the return policies etc. Neither did the cashier working to pay their way through college, or the dad working to pay for groceries.

These are the people on the other side of the counter who have to deal with the 'Karens' when a discount and a coupon won't stack because of store policy, or the cashier refused to do a return on an item with no receipt and no way to cross reference the transaction record.

These are the people who wonder if they will still have a job after a Karen encounter because of the customer is always right entitlement mindset.

Worry about people filming, read your store's return policy? Hang onto receipts. Email option for a receipt? Utilize it.

Remember that the staff trying to help are not responsible for the situation and working on the other side of the counter probably empathise with you more than you could ever know.

I was aware corporations put underpaid customer service on the front line and I was trying to be mindful of that, even prefacing that I may end up sounding frustrated but that the frustration wasn't directed at her.

I think the moment I flipped was when she said "we" and aligned herself (in my head) with the corporation executives. I understand that some corporations encourage loyalty and "professionalism," but honestly I probably would've been less triggered had she presented herself more as "I just work here."

 

[Darkkin]

Thanks for this. I know I probably just feel more self-conscious than most people because I very rarely assert myself so that, even if I wasn't doing anything extraordinary, it felt unusual by my standards and I worry I was being unnecessarily rude.

The thing about generally nonconfrontational folks, their veiw of rude and that of viral Karens are lightyears apart. One just wants a situation resolved, the other needs the drama.

 

[Darkkin]

I was aware corporations put underpaid customer service on the front line and I was trying to be mindful of that, even prefacing that I may end up sounding frustrated but that the frustration wasn't directed at her.

I think the moment I flipped was when she said "we" and aligned herself (in my head) with the corporation executives. I understand that some corporations encourage loyalty and "professionalism," but honestly I probably would've been less triggered had she presented herself more as "I just work here."

This shows that you are conscious of the situation, but even coming from a neurodivergent standpoint, a huge chunk of everybody is not going to be consciously thinking 'what if I trigger someone by using the royal 'we'?

It is the verbiage that society has trained us (just as the us functions as the royal we indicating society as a whole) to use, while the essence of the individual, ''I just work here,' is inherent to the context of the situation. And there is a good chance that if a clerk or whomever said the implied 'I just work here,' out loud they would be penalized for it.

Overall context is reading like you were entirely reasonable about the situation and shouldn't keep beating yourself up over getting frustrated and holding a boundary.

As I occasionally tell my best friend who deals with anxiety and ADHD. Stop borrowing blocks to build a mountain where there is none. Put the blocks down and step away for a few minutes.

Consider, is the mountain worth your time and effort to build? And how does it benefit anyone, especially you and your peace of mind?

You did nothing outrageous, erroneous, or egregious. You will not be an internet sensation on People of Voldemart.

 

[Bolletje]

Thanks for this. I know I probably just feel more self-conscious than most people because I very rarely assert myself so that, even if I wasn't doing anything extraordinary, it felt unusual by my standards and I worry I was being unnecessarily rude.

Oh yeah, I have that at the office. I’m usually very nice and easygoing, so whenever I enforce my boundaries, I feel like I’m being unnecessarily rude. My coworkers ensure me that’s not the case and I’m nice and they’re proud of me if I show a little backbone.

 

[Luca]

I have a service dog, and I’ve posted on here before about people taking photos/videos of me without my permission, usually to make fun of me.
So I totally understand being worried about this. I worry about it too, which makes me really paranoid about going to grocery stores, etc.

 

[Fino]

You would have to be pretty darn dramatic to go viral. Thousands and thousands of people don't want to watch just another dood being angry. We've all seen it dozens of times.