Ever been bullied? What was your best/worst experience?

[Jenisautistic]

I had been bullied before Many times before by many people in my life .

My worst experience : being bullied at school , some family issues ,me being in the hospital ,other things that led me to strongly believe I cannot have autism even though my psychiatrist says I have it.

My best: being with my friend _ and walking home from school together singing les miz and talking about stuff. My friend from my school fixing my hair.

 

[NiceCupOfTea]

Bullied a lot by my 3 older brothers as a child. I don't really want to go into the details, though.

At least at school I was largely left alone. One girl did pick on me fairly badly in the first term of high school, but thank god she left after that, otherwise that first year might gone a lot worse.

I don't have a single best memory, but I had some good times with my BFF. When I look at how boring and constrained my life is now, I feel almost nostalgic about my teen years. (In reality I had a lot of bad times as well, so I can't be too rose-tinted about it. But at least occasionally I had a thing called fun.)

 

[umbrellabeach]

I've been bullied. I was bullied a lot in the MN church my dad used to pastor. The memory that stands out to me most is that Wednesday night after youth group when I expressed a desire to be listened to equally with everyone else (they listened to each other but not to me) only for the youth leader to keep me 10-15 minutes afterward so she could lecture me about how they couldn't listen to me because they were "only human" and that I needed to stop "holding people to standards."
But I guess that said a lot more about her than me.

 

[artfull dodger]

I was bullied in high school to no end, beat up, books knocked out of my hands. My folder, called a "Trapper Keeper", in my school days taken from me, dumped on the floor. You name it the bullies did it to me up till 11th grade when I changed to a church school. Those last 2 years were the best school years of my life. When I went to community college I was also left alone. Didn't have many friends, but wasnt bullied there.

 

[Suzanne]

Yes. I was bullied because I was best friends with this girl, who had epilepsy, but rarely missed a day of school and I was constantly in and out of school, due to how I was raised, but no one knew, for I used to pretend I had wonderful parents and had a wonderful home and so, got ridiculed for always being off school. Didn't help that I sort of hung on to my friend for dear life, because without her, I felt I was nothing. Did not know I was autistic, but now, clearly see it all. I had no concept of friendship ( still struggle) and so, stumbled my way around the idea of friendship and not at all successfully.

I had my school bag snatched from me and flung upon the school roof ( low roof, but no low enough to retrieve my bag). Once when I went back to school, the class ostracized me and my "best friend" joined in. I was pushed when walking and I was also bullied in my own street, because I went to a special school for those with learning difficulties and so, would go to school via a coach and because those in my street went to mainstream school and did not know my school, they mocked me for being spastic and had to content with many school kids making rude gestures and shouting out spastic, as my coach went passed. I used to feel very sick about it all.

A girl who lived opposite me, became obsessed with me ( I now realise) and because she detected this other girl and I, were specific friends, in her jealousy I suppose, she would force me to sit with her on the coach, by holding up a knife to me.

She also used to taunt me about food and said that what ever I ate, maggots and things would come out and so, it caused me to stop eating food for long enough, that I needed to see a dr!

I see me being aspergeric in every area of my growing up and yet, I had no idea what it was; just assumed I was a most unlikable character.

 

[Myway]

I was bullied a lot in grade school because I couldn't communicate needs and wants. I still can't if it involves a NT, but I try really hard. It is not uncommon for people to not understand AS and bully someone because of it. Just ignore and don't take things so personally. It will make you a stronger person if you do.

 

[Cinnamon115]

I was bullied for 6th and 7th grade. A boy would say awful things to me like, "If you don't tell the school you are a terrorist, I will blow up your house." He would cheer with his friends if he could get me to cry. When I told this to my 6th grade teacher, she would tell him to stop or report him to the principal. Neither did any good. In 7th grade, he would say these things to me on the bus every day, and I often came home from school crying. This boy lived in my neighborhood and knew where I lived and would ring my door bell at midnight every night and it really bothered my family and me. The bullying finally stopped when his family moved. The worst part was is that he would bully me in front of everyone, and no one cared, no one stepped up to helped me. I've been left in a state of depression ever since. I don't have a single best memory, but just remembering all of the times I spent with my cat. He always seemed to know when I had had a bad day at school and needed a cuddle.

 

[capybara]

I was bullied throughout Elementary School, and for a few years afterwards. The school was small, with only around 20 students in total, and at a point all of them were bullying me, following me home and throwing garbage and crushed leaves at my head. I talked to my mum who talked to my professor who talked to the students' parents, but it didn't really help. Even the boy who had been my best friend for years turned against me. I spent those days mostly in my home, and stayed in class during recess. I'm not entirely sure why I was bullied, to be honest, I was always told it was because I had good grades but I think it was something else.

Last year - my first year of Uni in this new course - I was bullied as well, by my best friend, though I didn't understand it was such at the time. She pressured me a lot to change, and would go into these dark moods that made me feel very awful because I always thought it was my fault - and she did nothing to reassure me.

I've pushed away from her - trying to get closer to people who truly deserve my friendship now.

 

[DC1346]

Worst Experience: I attended private schools (mostly overseas) through the 10th grade. At the start of my junior year, my father was transferred back stateside ... to Atlanta, Georgia of all places. It was 1977 and the old Jim Crow laws had only been repealed for a little over one decade.

A blockbuster sold us a home in what had been an all white suburban neighborhood. After buying the house, my family started to receive unpleasant calls. "GO BACK TO CHINA, YOU STUPID GOOKS." I am ethnic Chinese just in case you were wondering.

Someone spray painted something unpleasant upon our garage door. My father wouldn't let me see what it was, but I returned from home to see him painting over some blue letters.

At school, I was one of two minorities in what was otherwise an all white school. The other minority was an African American named Kenneth and I was told that he was okay for a n----- because he was on the football team. The kids on my grade level told me that I was okay for a "chink" because I talked "white."

I went to ONE football game and never went again. Our suburban high school was playing an inner city school from Atlanta and in the bleachers where the white kids sat, they waved the Stars and Bars and shouted, "THE SOUTH WILL RISE AGAIN!"

I can only imagine what the African American kids thought.

I was bullied a lot at high school. I can't really think of one specific incident that was worse than any other because I was picked on everyday so that my entire junior year blurred into horrible year of misery and suffering.

A senior who was on the football team, really hated me. He physically bounced me off a wall at least once a week. In PE, my clothing would was once tossed into the shower and I had to wear my gym clothes to class. Wearing shorts into my sociology class produced wolf whistles from the girls and I was so embarrassed that the teacher gave me permission to return to the gym where I changed into my soggy clothes and squished about the school for the rest of the day.

The senior found out the combination to my locker and would often leave half eaten bites of my lunch in the locker. I stopped eating lunch and began hiding out in the library. One day the librarian asked me to run a film to a freshman class. The entire class erupted with cries of, "GO BACK TO CHINA YOU F**KING CHINK!" The teacher took the film in silence and SAID NOTHING ... not to me and not to her students.

I hated my high school so much that I developed an ulcer. I had tried talking to my parents about it, but they were dismissive. They never really listened to me and my mother's favorite adage was, "Children should be seen an not heard."

One day I collapsed in the bathroom from the pain of the ulcer. I woke up in the hospital and with the doctor's prompting, my parents FINALLY listened.

They talk to the school administration and learned that I had so many credits from having attended private schools that all I needed was senior English to graduate ... so I took this class over the summer and completed all of my assignments before my senior year even began. I graduated during the summer of 1977 and was promptly sent out of state by my parents to live with my Uncle Jim in California.

I have never returned to Georgia and although I understand that a lot of things have changed since the late 70's, I always get the willies when I hear a Southern accent. BTW - the old neighborhood I was in is now almost entirely African American and the school I attended also has a largely African American enrollment.

Best Experience: When I was 43, I moved to a small rural town in Pennsylvania. There was a small business behind me that built the fiberglass bodies for emergency response vehicles. One day while I was taking out the trash, I saw some of this company's employees waiting outside the warehouse doors for the 4 PM whistle to ring so they could clock out. One of the employees saw me and began hooting like a monkey. When I looked to see what he was doing, he was capering about, screeching like a maniac, while scratching under his armpits. When he saw me looking, he pointed at me and laughed saying, "See .... I told you that gooks speak monkey."

I was very angry. I thought about going back into my home, taking a baseball bat, and going after him but I also realized that this would make the problem worse. The guys would probably mob me and then I'd be the one getting beaten. There was also the possibility that I could have wound up in jail on an assault charge.

So I killed the creep with kindness.

On the following morning I got up early before the workday had begun and produced a dozen or so breakfast burritos. I took the burritos to the warehouse, introduced myself, and gave them to the foreman. I did not mention the incident from the previous day.

Later that day, as I was again taking out the trash, I heard the same bigoted idiot start to make monkey noises when I heard a meaty THUNK. I looked up to see that another employee had decked the racist jerk who was now down on the ground. The other men were glaring at him.

I didn't say anything.

I went back into my home and never had problems with this bully again.

 

[Rocco]

All experiences have been bad for me. Some very gratifying, yet I would categorize them all as bad. I do Not recommend this path, in general, I guess. I do not promote violence.

My parents divorced when I was in kindergarten, and I was an already "odd" kid and encountered some nasty bullies, and after the first time I was humiliated, I decided no more. From an early age my immediate response to bullying was to physically attack any bully or group of bullies. I fought after the first insult a lot for a while I guess, and people stopped harassing me.
When we moved to South Carolina I began 3rd grade with a Yankee accent, overweight and in special education classes, again a target.
Again I would fight to stop it when ever possible. I never picked a fight with anyone, except bullies. You have to speak their "language" and Some bullies only understand violence.
I settled down a bit in high school (growing to 6'-1" 195lbs helped) and have not fought as a civilian in many years. These days I make every attempt at diplomacy.
In my opinion, in some situations, you just have to stand your ground. Sometimes it's better to walk away. I may be entirely wrong. I have taken plenty of bruises and scars.
All bullying sucks, some are insecure and others are just idiots.

Social disclaimer:
I do not advocate or promote violence.

 

[allie]

Worst Experience: I attended private schools (mostly overseas) through the 10th grade. At the start of my junior year, my father was transferred back stateside ... to Atlanta, Georgia of all places. It was 1977 and the old Jim Crow laws had only been repealed for a little over one decade.

A blockbuster sold us a home in what had been an all white suburban neighborhood. After buying the house, my family started to receive unpleasant calls. "GO BACK TO CHINA, YOU STUPID GOOKS." I am ethnic Chinese just in case you were wondering.

Someone spray painted something unpleasant upon our garage door. My father wouldn't let me see what it was, but I returned from home to see him painting over some blue letters.

At school, I was one of two minorities in what was otherwise an all white school. The other minority was an African American named Kenneth and I was told that he was okay for a n----- because he was on the football team. The kids on my grade level told me that I was okay for a "chink" because I talked "white."

I went to ONE football game and never went again. Our suburban high school was playing an inner city school from Atlanta and in the bleachers where the white kids sat, they waved the Stars and Bars and shouted, "THE SOUTH WILL RISE AGAIN!"

I can only imagine what the African American kids thought.

I was bullied a lot at high school. I can't really think of one specific incident that was worse than any other because I was picked on everyday so that my entire junior year blurred into horrible year of misery and suffering.

A senior who was on the football team, really hated me. He physically bounced me off a wall at least once a week. In PE, my clothing would was once tossed into the shower and I had to wear my gym clothes to class. Wearing shorts into my sociology class produced wolf whistles from the girls and I was so embarrassed that the teacher gave me permission to return to the gym where I changed into my soggy clothes and squished about the school for the rest of the day.

The senior found out the combination to my locker and would often leave half eaten bites of my lunch in the locker. I stopped eating lunch and began hiding out in the library. One day the librarian asked me to run a film to a freshman class. The entire class erupted with cries of, "GO BACK TO CHINA YOU [deleted] CHINK!" The teacher took the film in silence and SAID NOTHING ... not to me and not to her students.

I hated my high school so much that I developed an ulcer. I had tried talking to my parents about it, but they were dismissive. They never really listened to me and my mother's favorite adage was, "Children should be seen an not heard."

One day I collapsed in the bathroom from the pain of the ulcer. I woke up in the hospital and with the doctor's prompting, my parents FINALLY listened.

They talk to the school administration and learned that I had so many credits from having attended private schools that all I needed was senior English to graduate ... so I took this class over the summer and completed all of my assignments before my senior year even began. I graduated during the summer of 1977 and was promptly sent out of state by my parents to live with my Uncle Jim in California.

I have never returned to Georgia and although I understand that a lot of things have changed since the late 70's, I always get the willies when I hear a Southern accent. BTW - the old neighborhood I was in is now almost entirely African American and the school I attended also has a largely African American enrollment.

Best Experience: When I was 43, I moved to a small rural town in Pennsylvania. There was a small business behind me that built the fiberglass bodies for emergency response vehicles. One day while I was taking out the trash, I saw some of this company's employees waiting outside the warehouse doors for the 4 PM whistle to ring so they could clock out. One of the employees saw me and began hooting like a monkey. When I looked to see what he was doing, he was capering about, screeching like a maniac, while scratching under his armpits. When he saw me looking, he pointed at me and laughed saying, "See .... I told you that gooks speak monkey."

I was very angry. I thought about going back into my home, taking a baseball bat, and going after him but I also realized that this would make the problem worse. The guys would probably mob me and then I'd be the one getting beaten. There was also the possibility that I could have wound up in jail on an assault charge.

So I killed the creep with kindness.

On the following morning I got up early before the workday had begun and produced a dozen or so breakfast burritos. I took the burritos to the warehouse, introduced myself, and gave them to the foreman. I did not mention the incident from the previous day.

Later that day, as I was again taking out the trash, I heard the same bigoted idiot start to make monkey noises when I heard a meaty THUNK. I looked up to see that another employee had decked the racist jerk who was now down on the ground. The other men were glaring at him.

I didn't say anything.

I went back into my home and never had problems with this bully again.

I'm so sorry about your experiences of racist violence. That sounds horrible.

 

[DC1346]

I'm so sorry about your experiences of racist violence. That sounds horrible.

Thank you.

Things are better now but as the proponents of the "Black lives matter" movement would attest, we still have various ways to go.

I am old enough to barely remember the old segregated South ... back in the days of the Jim Crow laws.

I remember the very first McDonald's to open in Atlanta. My father was a doctor and a serving officer in the U.S. Armed Forces. He took my family to this restaurant after work and was in his uniform.

The manager barred us from sitting down because seating was for whites only. We had to eat in our car and I could not understand why my mother was crying.

I was too young to understand racism. All I knew was that we had burgers, fries, and milkshakes. What was there to cry about?

(Sigh)

 

[Datura]

I was bullied through most of my childhood, but the worst bullying I experienced was as a young adult. This is the time of my life when I transitioned from male to female. Many individuals in society do not look kindly on people doing this. This also happens to be the period in which I finally felt comfortable enough with myself to actively persue a relationship. Before that I wasn't myself, so persuing a relationship under the pretense of being a dude just felt gross and dishonest.

During this time I was followed by strangers in cars who would shout insults and threats at me. Teenagers would laugh when I walked by, or even throw things at me. People would talk behind my back in disgust, or tell me that in their home country they would not hesitate to kill someone like me. But that wasn't the worst of it.

The worst came after I broke up with my first girlfriend. She came from a family that thrived on gossip and conflict, and her brother was an aggressive jerk with gang ties. At some point her brother gained access to her MSN and started to send me threats, saying that he was part of a street gang and that I would "get what's coming to [me]." He also knew all of my personal information including my home address and work schedule.

I then started to recieve harrassing calls from different people calling me all manner of vile names. I doccumented all of this and notified the police, but they made it very clear they weren't interested in my case. "Oh, they're probably just having fun.", they said. "They didn't say specifically what they would do to you, so it's not a threat.", and, "It's only harrassment if they call you, like, ten times a day."

All of this mad me feel very paranoid and angery. I started to have violent fantasies about what I would do to the people harrassing me. I also changed my work schedule to avoid an ambush. Thankfully they never made good on their threats, but I will never forgive them for the emotional harm they inflicted on me. Years after the fact I would still get the occasional hate call from a random idiot.


If anything good came of this it would have to be my work as an activist. For a time I served on a board that was instrumental in implementing anti-bullying programs across the country and raising awareness in schools of issues facing LGBT youth. I can't claim too much responsibility for all of that progress, but I was part of it.

 

[ExplosiveTMT]

My worst experience would have to be that time in primary school when a class of kids did something to me. I don't remember what it was, but I know that my reaction to that led the school principal to very nearly expel me, since I tore up a whole load of books in the school library in frustration.

I got bullied bad during those days, but my reactions to the bullying would always make me hate myself afterwards.
But I'm glad I came to practice ways to control the anger, letting it off in constructive ways, rather than destructive ways.

My best experience came one time a few years ago. A guy talked garbage at me, and one of my lady friends yelled at him. The reaction on his face was like that of a sulking dog. And he stormed off, while I giggled.

 

[Naturalist]

I have a lot of memories of bullying from childhood, but some of the worst involved my clothes. Because I found so many clothes to be uncomfortable, my mother made dresses for me to wear. I enjoyed this gesture from her. We went to the fabric store and selected patterns and fabric and she let me help her in each stage of the sewing, and I wore them everywhere.

I didn't have very many of the dresses at any given time, so I wore the same things repeatedly. They got very soft with many washings, but some of the cotton prints faded badly. People were always calling me names because of my clothes. Then one girl who sat behind me in class threatened to cut up my dresses with scissors. She sat behind me, snapping the scissors open and shut to make me anxious, but I didn't want to turn around because I knew I would get in trouble if I did. She did that for days and it made me so frightened. She even brought the scissors to the locker room in Phys Ed, and so I was scared to change clothes because I didn't want her to cut up my dress when I went out to class.

But another bad bullying incident ended with a very good experience. A boy in my middle school class started making a lot of sexual comments about me to other students, loudly enough that I could hear him, and said he was going to "get me". It made me feel very scared because he was much bigger than I was and very pushy. I went home and told my mother I didn't want to go to school any more. She complained to the school and he got in serious trouble for it.

We ended up at the same high school a few years later, but I rarely saw him because he took a very different course schedule from me. But one day I was at my locker and saw him coming toward me. I felt like I was going to panic. But when he came up to me, he was kind of sheepish and said he just wanted to apologize for saying all those awful things about me. He said he didn't expect me to be able to forgive him, but he needed to apologize because he knew it was hurtful to me. I thanked him and shook his hand, and asked if he was enjoying high school. He said yes, and he hoped I was, too. I didn't see him after that, but I am glad he found me to apologize. It was one of the bravest things I have ever seen anyone do, and it gave me the ability to let go of a lot of the residual feelings I had about bullying.

Not about my clothes, though...I still have serious panic attacks when it's time to choose clothes.

 

[NateSean]

It's taken me fifteen years to stop reliving the worst instance of bullying, so I won't do that here. All I will say is that looking back, knowing how many kids have taken their own lives between then and now, I am grateful that I had whatever it was that kept me wanting to breathe.

Nothing breaks my heart more, but it makes me want to work equally hard to have an ear available for my own sister, who also has her own bullying issues to deal with.

 

[Wolfmother]

Held down, mock raped, choked, slapped and screamed at...girl scout camp, if you can believe it. I asked what rape was and they jumped me.

 

[SenorDomino]

I was bullied. My memory is a little cloudy when looking back, I've repressed a lot.

Worst thing I can remember: It may not sound like much, but I think the random, quick comments like "tard" by people who biked past me was among what hurt the most. I should have stuck a stick in their wheels.

Best memory: Well, I thought I had some friends. Seeing as how they just stopped talking to me at one point and never seemed interested in how I was doing and were nowhere to be seen when I really needed help, I guess I didn't.

 

[Progster]

I wasn't physically abused by anyone, but was teased and name-called quite a bit. In my first year at school, all the kids started teasing me, and I melted down, which made it worse. It then became a game with them, to make me melt down. I couldn't understand why I was being picked on and used to shout "Why? Why?" at them, and they would all stand in a circle and chant "Why?" back at me. So that was my first ever nickname, "Why?" Luckily I moved from that school at the end of the school year, and the bullying stopped. At my new school, early one there was an incident where I hit a teacher, a teacher that all the other kids were afraid of, and the kids at my new school left me alone. I never knew how to handle being teased, I got upset and melted down, people would wind me up for their own amusement where I was unaware that I was being wound up. My older sister teased me a lot, and my brother to some extent until he went to his boarding school. I was name-called quite a bit in middle school, and just mainly ignored in high school. My brother later apologised for teasing me, but my older sister never did. I can never feel comfortable around my older sister.

 

[Robby]

I was bullied pretty much all through school. When I wasn't being treated like crap, I was basically ignored. In Middle School, I was bullied constantly, physically picked on, assaulted, and nobody did anything about it. It was like I didn't exist. In high school I was teased, called queer, fag, sissy, etc etc & bullied more. I skipped gym class and then started cutting school altogether because it was so miserable. I would miss class for 7-8 days at a time because I was so afraid of going back and being teased more. I withdrew into soap operas. I was failing school. Nobody did anything to help me. They just put me on academic probation which of of course made me feel even worse and more worthless. I barely graduated high school. School was miserable. I missed all the dances, because I had no friends. I hated it. It was miserable. I was even picked on by teachers I guess it made them feel real big picking on a student who had nobody. I loved the days I spent at home away from it watching tv.

To this day I trust nobody and assume everyone is going to bully me unless they prove otherwise. The funny thing was about school was in my early years I went to a public school, and it was great, no bullying at all, I had friends and was happy. Then I was put in a private school that you'd think would be better as far as bullying but it was an absolute nightmare. I still have post-traumatic stress from those years. It was awful. The people who bullied me were usually jocks, cheerleader types, but sometimes the nerdy kids would bully me too. Everyone hated me.