Feeling disconnected

[savi83]

Hi everybody,

Does anyone have a feeling of being disconnected from everyone around you?

I don't feel that I can develop a strong link to people. I am awful at making small talk and find it difficult to make emotional connections with people.

I am not really phased by it, I am quite happy spending time by myself and require little if any interaction with people.

 

[Judge]

Indeed, a common question here discussed in many threads.

Yes, throughout my life I've always had this nebulous sense of being on the outside looking in. Never feeling as if I was truly a part of everything going on around me.

Yet also acknowledging that solitude is my friend and that loneliness can be tolerated.

 

[Aspie_rin]

as long as you're happy that way, this is perfectly fine, though friendships and relationships help with personal growth... I don't have a big social drive myself, there's only a few rare people that I actually can bond with, though I always enjoy a good conversation (I think I'm more attracted to the ideas or the humor than to the person in these cases, though)

 

[xudo]

Yeah, I understand what you mean. Obviously I feel connected in terms of my husband, and the like 3 friends I do have (to varying degrees though). Other than that I've always felt and still do that I'm looking in, and not really a part of things.

 

[ZebraAutismo]

Their is times I have felt like that yes but their is times I feel really tuned in.

 

[Suzanne]

All the time when I am with others. And worse, too aware of my surroundings and the person who is talking.

Just spent, what felt like an eternity with this one woman who went on and on and on and on about people she has made friends and going into detail about people's lives and I could feel myself panicking and going in and out of awareness and felt as if I was going to actually faint from sheer bordom, when the person I was with said it was time to go!

It was awful and I felt like crying.

I say: all the time, but actually there is one person, other than my husband, who I feel utterly comfortable around and that is because she and I, are on the same page and rather interestingly, she wonders if she has aspergers too; or at least a few of the traits. We talk about things that usally turn people the other way.

I was sort of told off today, because I said that I was not really into small talk and this person said: well, neither am I really and then: what was it I was saying that constituted it as small talk? I hasten to add, she was the one who said: wow that must be really interesting for you? So I just said it is true, not that interesting to talk about getting a big lump of earth up and then she said: I don't find it interesting you talking about cross stitch! Actually, I just commented on the fact that on beautiful days, I sit in the veranda doing cross stitching and told her what I was doing, but certainly did not go into detail.

Phew NT's are damn hard work to be around!

 

[toothless]

Hi everybody,

Does anyone have a feeling of being disconnected from everyone around you?

I don't feel that I can develop a strong link to people. I am awful at making small talk and find it difficult to make emotional connections with people.

I am not really phased by it, I am quite happy spending time by myself and require little if any interaction with people.

you describe my entire life savi83,i have never had any connection to other human beings,as a child i was cut off completely from them and lived in my own world 24/7, to me humans look and seem like they are all the same generic lump of flesh shape and i struggle greatly to understand them,to me its like theyre only there for certain tasks or concepts-i dont mean in the way pyschopaths see humans but i have very rigid distant thinking and if i had to pick one thing in my world that i struggle with the most itd be anything involving humans,whether it be interacting,socialising or back forth communication.

i dont want to make my post a pity party but as a teen i had grew a hatred of human beings because of the bullying i suffered and i still suffer from that today and i try to tell myself not to because not all humans are bad,as this community proves and as my support staff and family prove.

 

[CassLovesBears]

Ive always wondered what made me feel so far from other people. All of my life ive felt as if ive had a very difficult time connecting with other people. Its not that i dont like them i just never feel connected with people unless they try really hard. I just feel like i need deeper relationships to get me there. And ironically I need more time put into the relationship or else im at risk of losing the feeling but at the same time i cant spend too long around people or else i get drained completely.


Is it an autistic trait to have a difficult time connecting with and feeling that connection with other people? Because if so that explains a lot and ill tell my doctor at my autism examination.

 

[GadAbout]

Yes, it can be. It's not enough for a diagnosis, but it is a common trait.