Hello everyone. I am new here.

[Opo]

Hello everyone. I am new here. I highly suspect I have level 1 autism. I have another diagnosis of OCD and GAD, yet I intuitively feel those diagnosis are not completely correct. (The GAD, yes). I am in the process of qualifying for an assessment for ASD, though it may be a lengthy process. The more I learn about ASD, the stronger ASD resonates with me. I am here to learn and gain some insight. Thank you for reading.

 

[tree]

 

[VictorR]

Welcome!

 

[Nitro]

 

[Opo]

View attachment 96216

Thank you!

 

[Opo]

Welcome!

Thank you!

 

[Alexej]

Hi and welcome @Opo

Do hang around a bit and get to know us and when you are ready, of feel you have something to add to a conversation jump in and post.

 

[Opo]

Hi and welcome @Opo

Do hang around a bit and get to know us and when you are ready, of feel you have something to add to a conversation jump in and post.

Thank you so much. I appreciate this. After reading and getting more informed about ASD, so much is beginning to make sense. There is so much to say. I just hope my Dr. grants me a referral to a specialist. Routine, details, high anxiety, sensory issues, literally not understanding how to talk to people outside of a scripted environment, and one funny one: I honestly have believe that if someone smiles and is kind to me, then they must have a crush on me. It's so weird. (They don't have a crush on me and if they did I would not be able to tell). The list goes on and on. Sunlight distorts my vision and the lighting at Target does, too. I love listening to others speak in the break room at work, but otherwise, I am quiet unless there is a scripted environment. I rearranged all of my chores just to see a play tonight. Going to the play has caused me anxiety all week long, but I want to support my friend. Otherwise, I literally never go to social events. Thank you for listening! I so appreciate it!!!

 

[WhitewaterWoman]

Welcome. It was amazing to me, too, when I figured out I was autistic. Suddenly my life made sense.

 

[Opo]

Thank you for responding! Yes, it's mind opening. I forgive myself for so many things.

 

[Thinx]

Hi and welcome. Forgive yourself and understand yourself better, hopefully. It's not all bad of course, we are different is all, with interesting abilities and upsides too. Good to see you here, I would say you recognising who you are is more important than a diagnosis.

 

[Human Avatar]

Hello

 

[Rodafina]

Thank you so much. I appreciate this. After reading and getting more informed about ASD, so much is beginning to make sense. There is so much to say. I just hope my Dr. grants me a referral to a specialist. Routine, details, high anxiety, sensory issues, literally not understanding how to talk to people outside of a scripted environment, and one funny one: I honestly have believe that if someone smiles and is kind to me, then they must have a crush on me. It's so weird. (They don't have a crush on me and if they did I would not be able to tell). The list goes on and on. Sunlight distorts my vision and the lighting at Target does, too. I love listening to others speak in the break room at work, but otherwise, I am quiet unless there is a scripted environment. I rearranged all of my chores just to see a play tonight. Going to the play has caused me anxiety all week long, but I want to support my friend. Otherwise, I literally never go to social events. Thank you for listening! I so appreciate it!!!

Well, I can relate to all of this! Sounds like you could really benefit from spending some time here, reading, writing, and learning. Lots of us will be able to relate, I think. Good to have you here.

 

[Luca]

Welcome!

I think you will really enjoy it here. There is a lot to learn but the people here are super welcoming and helpful. Feel free to share whatever you like, and we will do our best to help!

 

[Opo]

Hi and welcome. Forgive yourself and understand yourself better, hopefully. It's not all bad of course, we are different is all, with interesting abilities and upsides too. Good to see you here, I would say you recognising who you are is more important than a diagnosis.

Thank you for your response. Yes, understanding who I am. I am understanding so many times, now, where I was so burned out and depleted from over stimulation. So many times I went into hiding, into my silence simply to gain the energy to go back out there. Just explains so very much. Thank you for listening. What about you? I like to ask questions. I strayed from my

Hello

routine today. I am feeling so very tired and confused right now. Took much effort for me to see my friend's play tonight, but I did it. You? What are things like for you?

Hello

Hello!

Hello

Well, I can relate to all of this! Sounds like you could really benefit from spending some time here, reading, writing, and learning. Lots of us will be able to relate, I think. Good to have you here.

Awe, thank you for your kindness! If you are willing, could you please tell me some things you experience?

 

[Rodafina]

Awe, thank you for your kindness! If you are willing, could you please tell me some things you experience?

Sure, I don’t mind. I’ll just do an overview though because if I really go into depth you’ll be reading a book.

Sensory overwhelm

Bright lights, glaring sun, or certain indoor lights are confusing and distracting to me and make it hard for me to think.

Textures of certain clothing or fabrics can be intensely offputting where I’m trying to shake the feeling from my body and physically recoil when I touch them.

Many smells, mostly food are revolting and distracting. Again, it gets difficult for me to focus on the words or the task at hand when there are strong smells present. Eating is also difficult and I am very particular about taste, texture, and what I am eating from (bowl, cup, utensil).

Being around others who are eating and particularly hearing the sound of someone else eating is inordinately upsetting to me. I feel especially bad about this one because no one is doing anything wrong, but it completely overwhelms me. Another example is the sound of my dog licking his paws.

Sounds can be also distracting… Particularly when there is music being played in a store. That type of music sort of enrages me, again making my thinking cloudy and my desire to run away very strong.

There’s more, but let’s move on…

Social Overwhelm

Anything more than one to one interactions get stressful and confusing for me. I can manage myself and two others sometimes, but beyond that, I definitely mask a lot or keep quiet.

I despise being in close proximity to others, strangers or those who are familiar to me, and I prefer not to touch or hug as a means of affection.

I am hyper focused on my personal space when I am out in public, like at a store, and work hard to maintain my space and keep people from getting in my way. There is a strong sense of being trapped when someone is blocking my way or standing too closely.

Social events are a total nightmare, but I do them anyway because they are important to others. Everything about an event like a play or a concert large or small is difficult for me, but in good news, I am learning some strategies to manage them. Like leaving early, standing at the back, and sometimes just saying no, I will stay home.

———————

In addition to those things, there is generally a huge amount of anxiety with habits of overthinking, ruminating, and filling in all the blanks in my social communication with negative thinking. Constantly thinking I have upset people or am being rejected by them.

Also, a lack of reciprocal relationships. I am a masker, I have been for life (I am 42 now). I am able to interact well enough and meet other peoples needs, but it has come at a great cost to myself and although it seems as if some people have felt connected to me through life, I have been unable to feel the connection from my end. It was not until I started talking with people here on the forum that that began to happen.

There’s more, but I think if you spend time here on the forum and read alot you will get a better understanding of the range of challenges people here face.

I hope the forum can help you. It has been integral to me repairing a broken life, leaving drugs & alcohol behind and looking toward the future with optimism.

 

[Mr. Stevens]

^ I relate so much to everything you wrote. I agonized so much as a child over hating the sound of chewing, and still realizing the person had good manners. So much guilt.

The music in stores, too...it's so discomforting. I want to leave, but that won't solve the problem, because I still need to buy what I need to buy. And with that big annoyance going on, it can be hard to trust my judgment.

 

[Mr. Stevens]

Hello everyone. I am new here. I highly suspect I have level 1 autism. I have another diagnosis of OCD and GAD, yet I intuitively feel those diagnosis are not completely correct. (The GAD, yes). I am in the process of qualifying for an assessment for ASD, though it may be a lengthy process. The more I learn about ASD, the stronger ASD resonates with me. I am here to learn and gain some insight. Thank you for reading.

Good luck to you. Hopefully your learning provides insight

 

[Isadoorian]

Hi, and Welcome to the Forums! I hope you make new friends and enjoy your stay here in the process!

 

[Opo]

Sure, I don’t mind. I’ll just do an overview though because if I really go into depth you’ll be reading a book.

Sensory overwhelm

Bright lights, glaring sun, or certain indoor lights are confusing and distracting to me and make it hard for me to think.

Textures of certain clothing or fabrics can be intensely offputting where I’m trying to shake the feeling from my body and physically recoil when I touch them.

Many smells, mostly food are revolting and distracting. Again, it gets difficult for me to focus on the words or the task at hand when there are strong smells present. Eating is also difficult and I am very particular about taste, texture, and what I am eating from (bowl, cup, utensil).

Being around others who are eating and particularly hearing the sound of someone else eating is inordinately upsetting to me. I feel especially bad about this one because no one is doing anything wrong, but it completely overwhelms me. Another example is the sound of my dog licking his paws.

Sounds can be also distracting… Particularly when there is music being played in a store. That type of music sort of enrages me, again making my thinking cloudy and my desire to run away very strong.

There’s more, but let’s move on…

Social Overwhelm

Anything more than one to one interactions get stressful and confusing for me. I can manage myself and two others sometimes, but beyond that, I definitely mask a lot or keep quiet.

I despise being in close proximity to others, strangers or those who are familiar to me, and I prefer not to touch or hug as a means of affection.

I am hyper focused on my personal space when I am out in public, like at a store, and work hard to maintain my space and keep people from getting in my way. There is a strong sense of being trapped when someone is blocking my way or standing too closely.

Social events are a total nightmare, but I do them anyway because they are important to others. Everything about an event like a play or a concert large or small is difficult for me, but in good news, I am learning some strategies to manage them. Like leaving early, standing at the back, and sometimes just saying no, I will stay home.

———————

In addition to those things, there is generally a huge amount of anxiety with habits of overthinking, ruminating, and filling in all the blanks in my social communication with negative thinking. Constantly thinking I have upset people or am being rejected by them.

Also, a lack of reciprocal relationships. I am a masker, I have been for life (I am 42 now). I am able to interact well enough and meet other peoples needs, but it has come at a great cost to myself and although it seems as if some people have felt connected to me through life, I have been unable to feel the connection from my end. It was not until I started talking with people here on the forum that that began to happen.

There’s more, but I think if you spend time here on the forum and read alot you will get a better understanding of the range of challenges people here face.

I hope the forum can help you. It has been integral to me repairing a broken life, leaving drugs & alcohol behind and looking toward the future with optimism.

I am at work right now, but read everything that you wrote. I so appreciate that you took the time to answer my question in depth. You are well spoken and articulate. Going to read again when I get home. Maybe you should write a book!