Hello, hope I'm welcome here

[Babs]

The reason I say this is because I am not on the spectrum..I suspect my 17 year daughter has Aspergers traits..She does not think so. All I want to do is reach out and understand her, I do not want to fix her, I think she is misunderstood by many people (once they get to know her). I would love to receive advice from aspies or NT parents, some times I feel like I just want to talk and talk about traits, however, I've noticed this is usually when something has happened at home. Other times I can go ages without problems arising.I came about this forum because I Google 'are aspies always tired'. I am particularly worried because I think she is showing early signs of depression. Anyway hello everyone, please let me know if it's not appropriate for me to post on here

 

[NothingToSeeHere]

Of course you are welcome! There are other NT parents on here, and everyone is very supportive in general I hope you will enjoy your time on this forum and find it useful.

Constantly being tired was the first symptom of depression my mum noticed in me when I was 16, she took me to see a GP, they did blood tests to rule out anaemia and them transferred me to a psychologist where I was diagnosed. Have you discussed the possibility of depression with your daughter?

 

[Babs]

Thank you so much, I feel quite emotional at the moment because of a disagreement my daughter and I had last night. I feel like we don't understand each other and I desperately want to understand her. I have always thought we 'think' differently and accepted that as being her personality but I am pretty sure she has traits but not sure if it's enough to get a diagnosis.
As for depression, she mentioned it to me about 2 months ago. However, it was after a fall out with a friend and I thought it was may be because she was upset about that. I mentioned about taking her to doctor the following day. I left it up to her and said if she wants me to take her to let me know. She hasn't mentioned it since. For past few months she gas been napping a lot after she gets in from school, something, she never did. She worked all through the summer holidays and since going back to school has worked every Sunday. I was wondering if the tiredness is because she hasn't had much Me time and hasn't been able to recharge herself properly. The job finished end of October so was going to see if things improve. Hope you don't mind me asking but did your depression get better and how did things improve for you once Diagnosed?

 

[Brent]

Welcome, there are quite a few parents here. Enjoy your stay!

 

[Babs]

Thank you!

 

[Vanilla]

Welcome Babs

Of course we'd be happy to help you. We love nothing more than to see a parent so invested in caring for their child.

I've listed a few links below, which you may find useful.

Parenting section (you can post questions, and discuss issues, with other parents here: Parenting & Autism Discussions | AspiesCentral.com

Dr.Tony Attwood (a brilliant man, and world renown expert): Home

I recommend getting a copy of this book. It focuses on understanding women on the spectrum, as we can present different traits to men. It also has a guide for parents to better understand their daughters: Aspergirls: Empowering Females With Asperger Syndrome | AspiesCentral.com

Resources section: Autism & Asperger's Resources | AspiesCentral.com

Hopefully that will get you started.

 

[Sander]

Hey Babs, have you told her already, what you suspect? It might be good to do so, and if she agrees you can together read things here on the forum and see if she relates to some of the things.

You also need to have a lot of patience and make sure you don't force her into something.

Some tips that work in general

 

[StephF]

All are welcome here. We have parents, significant others etc as well as us Aspies. I'm sure you will find much of benefit here.

 

[Babs]

Thanks everyone. Can I just ask, if someone asks a question on this thread, do I respond back on this thread or do I message the individual..thanks

 

[Vanilla]

Thanks everyone. Can I just ask, if someone asks a question on this thread, do I respond back on this thread or do I message the individual..thanks

Depends really. If they ask on the thread, you can press the reply button, and reply right there. You will see some writing in the box; just write underneath that; it is simply there to quote the member you are responding to. You can however reply privately, if you feel it's appropriate to do so. This is probably more appropriate if you don't want to post your answer publicly.

 

[Babs]

Think I've just answered my own question, please be patient with me, not used to these Forums!

 

[Babs]

Depends really. If they ask on the thread, you can press the reply button, and reply right there. You will see some writing in the box; just write underneath that; it is simply there to quote the member you are responding to. You can however reply privately, if you feel it's appropriate to do so. This is probably more appropriate if you don't want to post your answer publicly.

Thanks Vanilla, that's what I thought

 

[Babs]

Hey Babs, have you told her already, what you suspect? It might be good to do so, and if she agrees you can together read things here on the forum and see if she relates to some of the things.

You also need to have a lot of patience and make sure you don't force her into something.

Some tips that work in general

Hi Sander, thanks for reply, yeah I have broached the subject but she thinks it's crazy. However, she planted the seed when we eere

Hey Babs, have you told her already, what you suspect? It might be good to do so, and if she agrees you can together read things here on the forum and see if she relates to some of the things.

You also need to have a lot of patience and make sure you don't force her into something.

Some tips that work in general

 

[Babs]

Hi Sander, thanks for reply, yeah I have broached the subject but she thinks it's crazy. However, she planted the seed when we were watching TV programme on Autism and she said she related to a lot of what the lady said about Social awkwardness, the lady was diagnosed with aspergers in her 40's

Hey Babs, have you told her already, what you suspect? It might be good to do so, and if she agrees you can together read things here on the forum and see if she relates to some of the things.

You also need to have a lot of patience and make sure you don't force her into something.

Some tips that work in general

 

[Vanilla]

Just thought I'd let you know that you can also edit posts, if you want to. Just click the button on the bottom, left of the post you want to edit

 

[Babs]

Just thought I'd let you know that you can also edit posts, if you want to. Just click the button on the bottom, left of the post you want to edit

Thank you, yes I needed to know that, as you can see, I accidentally posted mid sentence. Like I said, I'll get the hang of it!

 

[Cali Cat]

Hi, Babs. You may be on to something with the relationship between tiredness and depression. I experienced something similar in my teens, and I went into counseling for depression. I'm sure you'll get lots of great advice from the members on this forum. Welcome!

 

[Babs]

All are welcome here. We have parents, significant others etc as well as us Aspies. I'm sure you will find much of benefit here.

Thank you. I am already feeling the benefit, just by people popping up

 

[Babs]

Hi, Babs. You may be on to something with the relationship between tiredness and depression. I experienced something similar in my teens, and I went into counseling for depression. I'm sure you'll get lots of great advice from the members on this forum. Welcome!

Thanks for your reply, I'm just keeping an eye on her. Infact I asked her how she was feeling when she got home from school today and she said it comes and goes. So it might be stress more than depression, she's had a lot on lately. I'm here for her, I won't ignore it, I just need to make sure I get the balance right and when to step in.

 

[Nadador]

Hello, Babs.

It's lovely to see concerned parents reaching out to the AS community. You may find that's the best way to get your questions answered, as opposed to just by reading, or by asking a doctor who does not personally have AS. I'm glad to see you're already finding us helpful.

Reading your posts so far, I feel for you in your frustration over the gap of understanding you've found between you and your daughter. Be assured you're on the right track by being here. While you will never fully understand her experience of the world as she lives it, you can certainly become an educated interpreter and guide for her. Having someone like this in her life will be greatly beneficial, and can foster a very special bond that can last a lifetime. In a way, being parent to a child with AS is a unique opportunity. Not only can you learn a great deal about your child in ways most parents rarely do, but you will also inevitably learn a lot more about yourself.

Looking for ward to supporting your quest. It will be good to know you.