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Hello! I'm new here.

M

MTC

New Member
Hi all! I'm a 40F who is currently recently self-diagnosed. Just had a very illuminating conversation with my father yesterday about what I was like as a kid that confirmed a whole lot of suspicions. Currently reading a few books on autism in women and going, 'Yup, that's me.'

So it seems that many of us (if I may use 'us,' being self-diagnosed) just naturally feel a whole lot of anxiety about a whole lot of things. I'm wondering if there are any simple things to do to reduce some of this anxiety. I'm already on meds, but they just take me from an 11/10 down to a 7-8 out of ten--definitely an improvement, but it would be nice to live with even less anxiety.
 
Hi there and welcome - its a great place here to hang out, chat and browse threads on a whole gamut of questions related to being on the spectrum.

As far as anxiety goes - I think there are many here who share that particular affliction (including me). Solutions are very individual - mine cover making changes in my life to better suit my needs and abilities, mindfullness & stoicism as well as working on better communication and worrying less about masking. I'm sure others will add plenty of other experiences and views.
 
Welcome to the forum. Can you explain more about what things you are anxious with, as anxiety can be treated in many ways, depending on what your worries are, the source, your motivations, and the end result you hope to achieve.

For instance, some anxieties are natural, some can be lessened through our daily efforts like changing our attitude or perspective, having calming and positive visualizations, and from diverting our mind. And yet some anxieties are needed temporarily to avoid dangers or to learn.

Other anxieties may be helped by changing to any less anxious gestures or postures, using humor, being around supportive persons, and trying to change something else about you that can be altered, that you want to be changed, like physical health, self-esteem, increasing social skills, and through learning of practical skills, etc.
 
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Yes, anxiety is definitely high on the list of co-morbid conditions with autism. Maybe the most common one. Also, big bunches of us are only self diagnosed, and quite a few of those do not intend to get a formal diagnosis.

I too use meds for anxiety. I did get a Anxiety Disorder diagnosis early on in my military career, but it was not a disqualifier as it was treatable. A Autism diagnosis would have most likely meant a medical discharge and unfortunately still is a major obstacle for military service (USA). That's an example of one reason why a person might choose to remain under the radar. There are many others. Ironic in that my specialty was radar.

Like you, the anxiety med takes it down some notches. I think in my case though it prevents most anxious feeling problems. I did recently get a second med to take in addition for those occasions when certain events (known triggers) occur. That doesn't work 100% either, but its nice to have something in reserve.

I still at times have to fight the fight against anxiety. I generally first work thru is there really anything actually threatening (it normally isn't), or is a case where I can't do anything about it, or at least right now. And then I use distraction, engaging in a hobby, watching something on the computer with headphones on. I might even set up the computer next to the bed if it is preventing me from sleeping/relaxing.

I also am studying my Chihuahuas. I like looking for clues about human behavior in other species. And Chihuahuas have to be one of the more high strung creatures on earth and can have a fear/anger response to practically anything. Yet they have the longest lifespan of any dog. What is their secret?

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;)
 
Hi and welcome. I'm not anxious, but I probably was somewhat anxious as a child and young person, I did a lot of therapy which helped me become more secure as a person, though it was only in the last 10 years (I'm 63) that I looked into autism and realised this applied to me.

It probably can be useful to consider possible causes of anxiety, like for many it's a combination of issues, so, growing up with autism which can often affect communication and social interaction could be a background cause, also how parents or carers are and how they related to us, can contribute. Some issues can be worked on, to improve general wellbeing, that's where therapy can help.

Personally my role models are cats, rather than chihuahuas.
 
Welcome.

As for that anxiety: I detest it.
I am able to moderate it by an hour and a half of sweat inducing daily activity; walking, jogging/slow running, &/or spinning on a stationary bike with music.
And, toward that same end have recently have begun my search for a new family member in the furry form of a dog. ;)
 
Thank you all for the warm welcome! I just adopted a new cat today, and I feel myself vibing with him as he's been hiding under the bed since I brought him home.

I've been diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder; my two main problems are perfectionism and social situations, and the intersection of perfectionism and social situations really kills me (i.e., I must be perfect while out in public, must be seen as NT, sociable, friendly, etc.).

I like both dogs and cats, but since I discovered I wasn't allergic to cats, I've collected three of them. All rescues :). My last dog passed a month or so ago, so I'm not ready for another.
 
Hello. I am new too and incvestigating the spectrum question. My AQ scores agree that I am on the spectrum, but I've got a lot to un pack. Welcome to the forum.
 
watersprite said:
According to some books I’ve started to read, shaking can allow trauma to leave the body and brain. Maybe dogs (& other critters) maintain equilibrium by shaking it - the anxiety - off.
Click to expand...
I actually tried that once. I ended up with a headache.
 
Hi MTC and welcome,

I just joined this site today as well. Have you tried any of the general suggestions for managing anxiety? I find they are all decent, though more of trying to keep a base line for me.

I have extremely bad anxiety due to PTSD, so if I don't catch it quickly I lose consciousness. I have sedatives prescribed which help stop that from happening, but I try to keep my general anxiety levels low.

It helps a lot to know what makes my anxiety worse and what helps reduce it. For example my house makes my anxiety worse, so the first thing I do as soon as I feel the slightest bit of anxiety is get out the door. I work on my breathing and other similar high impact anxiety reducers on the way out the door. Talking to someone nice helps a lot too. I keep my phone on me at all times, even if it is just to call a crisis support center.

It sounds like 7-8/10 is low for you, which sounds dangerous to me. I wonder if there is another condition complicating things which you can work on further?

All the best! <3
 
Welcome, I look forward to getting to know you.
Here are some things that help me. I live in the moment. When I get out of that mind set I pull myself back into it. The past is gone, the future has not come and all we have is right now. I also control the things I can and try to let the rest go. In the last few months I have had to retrain my brain. Thoughts create pathways in the brain. The more we think a thought the more ingrained that thought becomes. When I became disabled I lived in fear. My whole life had changed and my independence was threatened. What am I going to do? What am I going to do? Even though I recreated a life of sustainability that fear and those thoughts just kept on grinding into my brain. I had to confront that fear and accept that I had done everything I could to maintain my independence and be secure and now I have to change my thought pattern because it was no longer constructive but had, in fact, become destructive. So I live in the moment and let my fears of the future go because there is nothing more I can do.
I make myself as safe and secure as posssible to reduce the anxiety around situations and of living. I have a safe place to go when I have to go out in public and when it will be for an extended period of time. I escape to bathrooms a lot. For shorter periods of time I remind myself of how long that period will be and know that I have been able to sucessfully deal with that in the past. Knowing that I have and can be successful helps. As much as possible I remind myself that I can leave any time I want. That most times I don't "have" to be there if I don't want to. One of the most anxiety producing situations for me is not being able to leave. Appointments are very anxiety producing for me.
My anxiety is about loss of control. I am not a controlling person toward others but I need to be able to control my situations. I need to feel I have choices.
My greatest fear is that I will be helpless and dependent upon others for care which did in fact happen seven and a half years ago. My other anxiety is that I will embarrass myself in public. I hate having people focus their attention on me. It was difficult to go out in public after becoming disabled because the disability drew unwanted attention to myself and not always in a good way. I turned to another of my coping mechanisms and that is to brazen it out.
For decades I forced my way through my anxiety but now that I am old my whole goal is to make my life as easy as possible for myself and that means making myself comfortable. It's about me now and what I need. Focusing on my needs rather than on other peoples expectations also reduces my anxiety.
I hope this helps.
 
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