Cloudyday
Member
Hello,
I'm Cloudyday and I'm from Yorkshire in the UK and I was dxd at the age of 37, which given I'm now in my mid 50's means I've had 17 years of adjustment and adaption to what has been a new life.
There are still many areas that have not changed even with a better knowledge of my condition, for instance my sensitivities to sound and touch and also my 'pattern' as I call it that orders each day just the same and rings it with a barrier of anxiety. However dx has led to my returning to education and taking a long and rewarding journey through academic art. I've also been a writer since I was 13 and like all writers I doggedly press on with one manuscript after another and try to make each better than the last. I had poems published years ago but that involved a voluntary role in a network of writers that broke down as I found interacting with larger numbers of people increasingly difficult.
I live on my own where I have a rollercoaster tension problem that spoils my state of mind every few hours. I often think it's the part of me that feels regret and wants to go out and achieve something, only the problem is that whenever I leave the house I can't relate to anyone except in the simplest ways. At the age of 54 I really need to stay home and paint and write and just let go of the social world - and quite often I manage it.
I also enjoy photography. I have a number of friends but as many will know here it becomes harder for people who have settled down and started families to find time for their old reclusive friend-of-old.
In general I would say my life has been shaped in decades: Ages 1-4: pre-AS symptoms: a great time. Ages: 5-11: slow alienation and torture at school, including abduction. 11-16: withdrawal from all others and increased bullying. 16-20: Arrival of poetry. 20-30: Return to Education. 30-40: Poetry networks and publication. 40-50 Higher Education and fine art. 50-54: Partial withdrawal, continuing writing, occasional exhibitions. I would say, and I'm guessing, that this decade is about novels because I am slowly writing my second, the first having not made it onto an agent or publisher's desk. The second is better so far.
I would say that AS is a paradox, because History seems to have been given a helping hand by a condition that has so many morally refined and painstaking qualities, yet those that bear the condition often feel themselves punished for it.
I should like to say an extra hello to all those with poor attention here because I know what it is like to leave the house without a wallet, and then with a wallet but without the phone, and then with the phone and the wallet (or bill-fold as it is called in the US) but without the bus-card and so and so on.
Hello to everyone again. The very best of luck to us all.
Cloudyday.
I'm Cloudyday and I'm from Yorkshire in the UK and I was dxd at the age of 37, which given I'm now in my mid 50's means I've had 17 years of adjustment and adaption to what has been a new life.
There are still many areas that have not changed even with a better knowledge of my condition, for instance my sensitivities to sound and touch and also my 'pattern' as I call it that orders each day just the same and rings it with a barrier of anxiety. However dx has led to my returning to education and taking a long and rewarding journey through academic art. I've also been a writer since I was 13 and like all writers I doggedly press on with one manuscript after another and try to make each better than the last. I had poems published years ago but that involved a voluntary role in a network of writers that broke down as I found interacting with larger numbers of people increasingly difficult.
I live on my own where I have a rollercoaster tension problem that spoils my state of mind every few hours. I often think it's the part of me that feels regret and wants to go out and achieve something, only the problem is that whenever I leave the house I can't relate to anyone except in the simplest ways. At the age of 54 I really need to stay home and paint and write and just let go of the social world - and quite often I manage it.
I also enjoy photography. I have a number of friends but as many will know here it becomes harder for people who have settled down and started families to find time for their old reclusive friend-of-old.
In general I would say my life has been shaped in decades: Ages 1-4: pre-AS symptoms: a great time. Ages: 5-11: slow alienation and torture at school, including abduction. 11-16: withdrawal from all others and increased bullying. 16-20: Arrival of poetry. 20-30: Return to Education. 30-40: Poetry networks and publication. 40-50 Higher Education and fine art. 50-54: Partial withdrawal, continuing writing, occasional exhibitions. I would say, and I'm guessing, that this decade is about novels because I am slowly writing my second, the first having not made it onto an agent or publisher's desk. The second is better so far.
I would say that AS is a paradox, because History seems to have been given a helping hand by a condition that has so many morally refined and painstaking qualities, yet those that bear the condition often feel themselves punished for it.
I should like to say an extra hello to all those with poor attention here because I know what it is like to leave the house without a wallet, and then with a wallet but without the phone, and then with the phone and the wallet (or bill-fold as it is called in the US) but without the bus-card and so and so on.
Hello to everyone again. The very best of luck to us all.
Cloudyday.