Hi Guys/Girls
I'm an older guy who was recently referred by my Dr. and have had 2 diagnostic assessments so far with another one to come. I will almost certainly be diagnosed with HFA. Although I always knew something was not quite right I masked my symptoms for years. I have been in IT for 20 years mostly self employed until a few years ago when I got this wonderful job of teaching IT to blind people. My terrible social skills have become apparent at my place of work. I am lucky to have a manager who had an idea of what was going on and has helped me a lot at work. My manager has told me I excel in the core duty of my job of teaching blind people how to use technology and I am never late for work and can work on my own without any help. It's lunch time and breaks where my social skills or lack of sometimes show in front of my colleagues.
I avoid social occasions and although I have been with my wife for over 30 years I have hardly ever took her out, I cannot offer her much in the way of emotional support, never know when she is upset or annoyed, embarrassed her more times than I can remember in front of family and friends due to my very poor comprehension of what is and is not acceptable in social situations, had meltdowns where I have said awful things to her and never see her side of things. She has read about what it can be like married to someone with HFA and sees her own life in the stories of these wives. Despite all this she says I am incredibly loyal, honest (except when she goes on and on and I want her to shut up), funny, and intelligent and have always provided her and our 2 kids with a very good living, so its not all bad been married to an Aspie ( although my medical contact has told me they have don't really use the term Aspergers now). After reading some horror stories from partners who have Aspies for a spouse I would like to say that you can have a long and meaningful relationship with one.
Like a lot of adults who are late in a diagnosis I was able to mask my behaviours by copying others and by not going out. When I am diagnosed I will be offered some support both at work and for personal. I look forward to that day, I want to improve things for my work and wife.
Brian 50
I'm an older guy who was recently referred by my Dr. and have had 2 diagnostic assessments so far with another one to come. I will almost certainly be diagnosed with HFA. Although I always knew something was not quite right I masked my symptoms for years. I have been in IT for 20 years mostly self employed until a few years ago when I got this wonderful job of teaching IT to blind people. My terrible social skills have become apparent at my place of work. I am lucky to have a manager who had an idea of what was going on and has helped me a lot at work. My manager has told me I excel in the core duty of my job of teaching blind people how to use technology and I am never late for work and can work on my own without any help. It's lunch time and breaks where my social skills or lack of sometimes show in front of my colleagues.
I avoid social occasions and although I have been with my wife for over 30 years I have hardly ever took her out, I cannot offer her much in the way of emotional support, never know when she is upset or annoyed, embarrassed her more times than I can remember in front of family and friends due to my very poor comprehension of what is and is not acceptable in social situations, had meltdowns where I have said awful things to her and never see her side of things. She has read about what it can be like married to someone with HFA and sees her own life in the stories of these wives. Despite all this she says I am incredibly loyal, honest (except when she goes on and on and I want her to shut up), funny, and intelligent and have always provided her and our 2 kids with a very good living, so its not all bad been married to an Aspie ( although my medical contact has told me they have don't really use the term Aspergers now). After reading some horror stories from partners who have Aspies for a spouse I would like to say that you can have a long and meaningful relationship with one.
Like a lot of adults who are late in a diagnosis I was able to mask my behaviours by copying others and by not going out. When I am diagnosed I will be offered some support both at work and for personal. I look forward to that day, I want to improve things for my work and wife.
Brian 50
May you feel right at home here.
