Hey..

[Stopheles]

I was contacted by a childhood friend several months ago, telling me they'd been diagnosed with Adult Aspies. Several conversations later he told me "Don't get offended or anything, but you need to get tested. you're definitely not NT." I looked into it and realized I definitely have just about every symptom in the spectrum for an adult Aspies female. So I got tested. Big ol' YES on that one. It really explains a lot of things for me. I haven't really told anyone, because I told my best friend and she has a background as a healthcare worker who specializes in children with severe Autism. Since I told her, she no longer speaks to me. I don't connect well with people, and I suck at conversational cues. Since I'm in a very specialized professional line of work, I'm reluctant to actually let it be known. I'm still learning about Asperger's and always willing to find a better way to improve my social skills..I tend to bulldoze over social interactions.

 

[Tom]

So sad that a best friend, with experience, would act that way. Outside of trusted family and a few very carefully selected people, I keep it secret. I most especially would not tell anyone at work or in social groups.

 

[clg114]

I was contacted by a childhood friend several months ago, telling me they'd been diagnosed with Adult Aspies. Several conversations later he told me "Don't get offended or anything, but you need to get tested. you're definitely not NT." I looked into it and realized I definitely have just about every symptom in the spectrum for an adult Aspies female. So I got tested. Big ol' YES on that one. It really explains a lot of things for me. I haven't really told anyone, because I told my best friend and she has a background as a healthcare worker who specializes in children with severe Autism. Since I told her, she no longer speaks to me. I don't connect well with people, and I suck at conversational cues. Since I'm in a very specialized professional line of work, I'm reluctant to actually let it be known. I'm still learning about Asperger's and always willing to find a better way to improve my social skills..I tend to bulldoze over social interactions.

I do not tell anyone who does not need to know. It has been my experience that "most people" ether can not or will not understand. The things that they think are all most always wrong and often downright weird. I think you are on the right track by not telling anyone who does not need to know.

 

[Suzanne]

Oh how awful that this so called best friend, should behave in such an unkind manner and NO WONDER you are reluctant to tell others.

To be honest, how your "best friend" has acted, is pretty bizarre!

I have ventured to tell a few people, but try my hardest to refrain from telling everyone, as people either have no heard of it, or are so indoctrinated with how someone who has autism, should look and behave, that I end up feeling stupid and as though, I am trying to fit a picture to me, when the reality is, like you, I fit almost all the female adult aspie traits.

I am married to an nt and so, have learned a great deal of him and it struck me very recently, that one thing, I have learned to deal with is quick fire questions or having my name called out suddenly! This used to freeze me and I tried to learn to keep on my toes constantly, so that I could be on the ball when someone says something suddenly to me.

Still awful with social interactions! But can now keep looking someone in the eyes!

 

[Stopheles]

Thanks everyone, honestly, I haven't even told my boyfriend of 2 years. He's extremely intelligent, honest, and loyal to a fault, but after my "friend" dropped me like a bag of trash after 5 years, I'm kinda worried to say anything. He really just accepts me for who I am and treats me wonderfully. He's NT and gets a huge kick out of me "not being like other girls". I've always been honest about my thought processes and aversions and behaviors, he just accepts it all part and parcel as who I am. He's remarkably sensitive to things that bother me and things I obsess over, and he does his best to help me avoid frustrating situations and even researches things I get caught up in so we can discuss them together. Just kinda..don't want to throw a medical diagnosis at him..sorry, word vomit again. Anyway, thanks you guys

 

[Vanilla]

Welcome

I'm sorry to hear about your friend. That's a bit of a surprise reaction, considering her connection to the autistic community. I hope you're able to find a bit more support, from our members, here. We're a rather friendly community, so I hope you feel right at home. I've added a few links, below, which might be of interest to you.

AS for females:

Aspergirls: Empowering Females With Asperger Syndrome | AspiesCentral.com

Day 62: Females with Asperger’s Syndrome (Non-Official) Checklist | Everyday Asperger's

Tony Attwood (a YouTube search is worth doing too):

Home

The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome | AspiesCentral.com

 

[Stopheles]

Welcome

I'm sorry to hear about your friend. That's a bit of a surprise reaction, considering her connection to the autistic community. I hope you're able to find a bit more support, from our members, here. We're a rather friendly community, so I hope you feel right at home. I've added a few links, below, which might be of interest to you.

AS for females:

Aspergirls: Empowering Females With Asperger Syndrome | AspiesCentral.com

Day 62: Females with Asperger’s Syndrome (Non-Official) Checklist | Everyday Asperger's

Tony Attwood (a YouTube search is worth doing too):

Home

The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome | AspiesCentral.com

Thank you so much! I'm trying to research everything I can. I do better if I have a realistic expectation. I'm so glad I found this site.

 

[Stopheles]

Oh how awful that this so called best friend, should behave in such an unkind manner and NO WONDER you are reluctant to tell others.

To be honest, how your "best friend" has acted, is pretty bizarre!

I have ventured to tell a few people, but try my hardest to refrain from telling everyone, as people either have no heard of it, or are so indoctrinated with how someone who has autism, should look and behave, that I end up feeling stupid and as though, I am trying to fit a picture to me, when the reality is, like you, I fit almost all the female adult aspie traits.

I am married to an nt and so, have learned a great deal of him and it struck me very recently, that one thing, I have learned to deal with is quick fire questions or having my name called out suddenly! This used to freeze me and I tried to learn to keep on my toes constantly, so that I could be on the ball when someone says something suddenly to me.

Still awful with social interactions! But can now keep looking someone in the eyes!

Haha! My boyfriend loves to lecture, which I really get into, but he also does the rapid-fire questions days later, then he usually grins and says "I'm sorry I made you go all deer in the headlights, but your answers were spot on!" I come from a teensy little town, and most people there have some awful idea of Aspies, I was always just known as weird, and that's fine with me. I was also misdiagnosed as a teenager, everything from rapid cycle bipolar to 'she's fine, she's just really smart' So because I lived in a really small town and was open about my psychiatry appointments, I'm not telling any family about my diagnosis. Google is like anathema to them, so I'll just continue to be that weird chick. Luckily I have a job that lets me contract out to different states for short term positions, so my coworkers leave me references like "Very detail oriented, extremely knowledgeable in the field