@Orlando Morean, amazing interview. As a parent,...and I am,...2 boys, now in their mid-20's (both very successful),...and as someone that specializes in neonatal medicine for the past 35 years or so,...I can appreciate both the physiological and psychological impact as a parent, as well as knowing the real world consequences of being somehow different. I wish more people had the attitude that Nick Vujicic had about life,...the world would be a much better place.
I can see why this interview impacted you enough to recommend it to me,...and thanks. However, as you said,
"It may not be in line with your needs,..." Getting back to your original post and my previous response,...and this is just me,...but I don't feel as if I had a strong
need for anyone. This is a bit of a double-edged sword here, but my parents instilled a very strong sense of independence with me,...my parents, by today's standards would be accused of neglect in the sense that I didn't have much supervision growing up. If I wanted something, I had to get it,...and usually little kids do want something (the latest toy, trendy clothes, whatever),...and with parents that didn't have much money, they were quick to remind me that requires money. So, I worked,...kid jobs,...yard work, shoveling snow, cleaning garages, painting, collecting bottles, cans, and newspapers (a local recycling center paid by the pound),...whatever. Pulled my little red wagon around the neighborhoods for hours and hours. I always had money. I was out the door by 7-8am and had to be home for dinner or before dark. I was buying my own clothes by the time I was 12yrs old. I had enough money saved up to pay for the first two years of college. At 18yo, my parents dropped me off at the university,...some 3hrs away,...dumped my stuff off in my dorm room and they were gone,...and that was pretty much it. I had no transportation of my own,...I worked on campus,...and if I wanted to come home, I had to find a ride there and back,...even at Christmas. My parents
were not going to make that trip.
In some respects, I appreciate what they did for me,...it pushed me to not depend upon others and to just do things myself,...a double-edged sword. My wife and I, for many years afterward,...and still to this day,...I get frustrated with this idea that my projects involve me, and not her,...but her projects always involve me doing most of it. I have done all sorts of things, complete renovations on a house, studied and passed the electrician's license test so I could get a permit to do a complete home rewiring, I've rebuilt engines, transmissions, suspensions, learned how to weld, on and on,...by myself,...jobs that realistically were professional jobs that often required two or more people. That's the type of independent person I am.
So, throw that independent streak onto an autistic person who, frankly, has a serious interpersonal bonding issue (both physiologic and psychologic),...one can hopefully understand that sometimes leaving people behind does not cause any emotional or psychological stress. People come and go in my life,...a revolving door. Rarely do we separate on bad terms,...we just drift apart. As it is with my parents and siblings,...we just drifted apart,...and no hard feelings.
I hope that your son, in his own way, is not harboring any hard feelings,...but rather he may just have an interpersonal bonding issue, has a sense of independence, he's just drifted apart from you,...and he's totally OK with his life and doing well. If that's the case, I think the door is likely open to rekindling a relationship if he's willing to put some mental energy towards it.
