hi everyone. what do you think about the following ?

[Sss]

I am subscribed to a certain mailing list that delivers food for thought.
Today they sent " 7 Things emotionally intelligent people don't do"
Number 5 was the following:

5. They don’t count on others for happiness or confidence.
Emotionally intelligent people are self-sufficient in all manners of life, including their contentment and peace of mind. They have learned that to bank on someone else making them feel joyful or worthy is to put themselves at risk for disappointment and hopelessness. Rather, they take their emotions in their own hands and find hobbies that delight them, strive for achievements that will lead to a sense of self-worth, and search within for love and acceptance.

If i understand correctly, here having an internal point of reference presented as something to strive for. Because most people are very concerned with external interactions and worry about it.
At the same time, if you are a natural at the "emotional intelligence point number 5", it becomes the basis for aspergers diagnosis. You are not concerned enough with external interactions.

 

[Reload...]

Personally I would disagree with that conclusion. To make it a basis of aspergers diagnosis would be to assume that that is always the case. It goes to the old assumption that aspies lack empathy when in fact that assumption is very wrong. That's just my opinion though.

 

[Rocco]

Welcome aboard

 

[tree]

I am subscribed to a certain mailing list that delivers food for thought.
Today they sent " 7 Things emotionally intelligent people don't do"
Number 5 was the following:

5. They don’t count on others for happiness or confidence.
Emotionally intelligent people are self-sufficient in all manners of life, including their contentment and peace of mind. They have learned that to bank on someone else making them feel joyful or worthy is to put themselves at risk for disappointment and hopelessness. Rather, they take their emotions in their own hands and find hobbies that delight them, strive for achievements that will lead to a sense of self-worth, and search within for love and acceptance.

If i understand correctly, here having an internal point of reference presented as something to strive for. Because most people are very concerned with external interactions and worry about it.
At the same time, if you are a natural at the "emotional intelligence point number 5", it becomes the basis for aspergers diagnosis. You are not concerned enough with external interactions.

This doesn't mean that a person can't enjoy
interactions with other people, just that the
source of happiness/confidence should not be
exclusively external (should not be dependent
upon the action or reaction of another person.)

 

[ancusmitis]

The "independence" of non-disabled people is usually highly exaggerated. We don't think of needing to buy milk from the store as a form of dependence, but needing to buy a cane or a wheelchair is. Same with psychiatrically defined disabilities. We're dependent because we need help with things they don't, not because they don't need help. Because they do. A lot of it. Everyone does.

 

[Myway]

Welcome to AC. I tend to disagree with that. Hope you enjoy your time here.

 

[Tom]

Hi & Welcome,
I am not sure about the correlation. The point number 5, sounds a bit like a embellished horoscope or personality description. There may be similarities, but the cause and effect are different. For instance an Aspie doesn't usually choose solitariness because they fear disappointment when depending on others. They prefer to go it alone to prevent stress and distraction from being around others. They focus intently on interests not to 'achieve self worth', but because they are just very interested.