rainbowbright64
New Member
Hi,
My username is rainbowbright64. As you can probably tell by the username, I love rainbow colors. I am a little shy, and a little scared/nervous. I am here to learn more about autism, since I heavily suspect I am high functioning autistic. This is a bit out of my comfort zone, I've never really done well with people, but I am willing to come out, learn, and grow. And, to be honest, the family I live with right now is uninformed and does not believe in autism as a spectrum. Since I do not show the surface-level stereotypical signs, not even when I was a kid, they don't think I am autistic. I want to thank a friend of mine, who I met at work, for helping me stand up for myself and take the necessary steps needed to at least figure out myself more. I never had a friend who understood what I was going through before, and so far, she is the only friend I have (and I am grateful for her). Even if I am wrong, I am willing to learn more, to be informed, and to find the necessary support I need in order to grow.
I am female 25, currently stuck at home due to circumstances beyond my control (money and gaslighting from my current living conditions being the more prevalent problems currently). I am working to move out this year to get to the family who supports me for who I am. It's just hard and it is taking an emotional toll on me, especially when I wonder if I am doing everything right. I'll write in more detail later. But, if they happen to find out my posts on here, I do not care anymore. I got one life, and I want to be with people who care. I have been struggling with depression and anxiety for years; I think the symptoms started showing up at 12. I am untreated, by the way. Therapy is looked down upon in the household I'm in. I have social anxiety, but work has helped me cope. My main passion is writing and sketching. When I write, I feel like myself. It's part of my lifeblood. Sketching calms me down. While I am not a professional artist, drawing my own OCs brings me comfort when I need it. My favorite genres are fantasy and horror, primarily psychological horror and monster films. Slashers are okay, but it's just not my favorite. I love rainbows; I think life needs more of them. Kind of funny to love bright colors so much, and then talk about horror films. Don't Hug Me I'm Scared mixes both nicely, lol!
I am an INTJ-T 5w6, and I am also a Gemini. While I am quiet, I suppose most of my silly chaos comes in the form of art. I heard I used to be really chatty when I was younger, but I don't remember that. I remember being blunt to a fault, but not chatty. Maybe with topics I know, which is still true to this day. I guess I got so used to people talking over me, lol! Anyway, this is all I can think of about myself...Oh, and I like early bumpers of Nickelodeon and Cartoon Network. I like seeing how creative and weird they are. I love Carebears, and anything cute, colorful, and soft! Okay, I think that's it. I hope to learn more and to come out of my shell.
Thank you all for reading! I know it's a lot, but it honestly feels good to finally get my voice out here. If anyone is going through something similar, I hope things will get better. And you're not alone, okay? Take it from me, an internet stranger. There are people out there who care for you. Even if it's just one person, remember that person, alright? Take care everyone, and be safe!
My username is rainbowbright64. As you can probably tell by the username, I love rainbow colors. I am a little shy, and a little scared/nervous. I am here to learn more about autism, since I heavily suspect I am high functioning autistic. This is a bit out of my comfort zone, I've never really done well with people, but I am willing to come out, learn, and grow. And, to be honest, the family I live with right now is uninformed and does not believe in autism as a spectrum. Since I do not show the surface-level stereotypical signs, not even when I was a kid, they don't think I am autistic. I want to thank a friend of mine, who I met at work, for helping me stand up for myself and take the necessary steps needed to at least figure out myself more. I never had a friend who understood what I was going through before, and so far, she is the only friend I have (and I am grateful for her). Even if I am wrong, I am willing to learn more, to be informed, and to find the necessary support I need in order to grow.
I am female 25, currently stuck at home due to circumstances beyond my control (money and gaslighting from my current living conditions being the more prevalent problems currently). I am working to move out this year to get to the family who supports me for who I am. It's just hard and it is taking an emotional toll on me, especially when I wonder if I am doing everything right. I'll write in more detail later. But, if they happen to find out my posts on here, I do not care anymore. I got one life, and I want to be with people who care. I have been struggling with depression and anxiety for years; I think the symptoms started showing up at 12. I am untreated, by the way. Therapy is looked down upon in the household I'm in. I have social anxiety, but work has helped me cope. My main passion is writing and sketching. When I write, I feel like myself. It's part of my lifeblood. Sketching calms me down. While I am not a professional artist, drawing my own OCs brings me comfort when I need it. My favorite genres are fantasy and horror, primarily psychological horror and monster films. Slashers are okay, but it's just not my favorite. I love rainbows; I think life needs more of them. Kind of funny to love bright colors so much, and then talk about horror films. Don't Hug Me I'm Scared mixes both nicely, lol!
I am an INTJ-T 5w6, and I am also a Gemini. While I am quiet, I suppose most of my silly chaos comes in the form of art. I heard I used to be really chatty when I was younger, but I don't remember that. I remember being blunt to a fault, but not chatty. Maybe with topics I know, which is still true to this day. I guess I got so used to people talking over me, lol! Anyway, this is all I can think of about myself...Oh, and I like early bumpers of Nickelodeon and Cartoon Network. I like seeing how creative and weird they are. I love Carebears, and anything cute, colorful, and soft! Okay, I think that's it. I hope to learn more and to come out of my shell.
Thank you all for reading! I know it's a lot, but it honestly feels good to finally get my voice out here. If anyone is going through something similar, I hope things will get better. And you're not alone, okay? Take it from me, an internet stranger. There are people out there who care for you. Even if it's just one person, remember that person, alright? Take care everyone, and be safe!
rainbow colors too. I hope you find some comfort and insight here, and that something good happens to you today. 
