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Hi. I'm very new to this...50 and in the process of formal assessment

M

MarkD67

Active Member
Hi, I'm very new to the whole idea of being autistic (I don't like the sound of "having autism". It doesn't feel right). My psychiatrist has started the ball rolling with formal assessment, but when we discussed it, so very many things made sense. I'm almost 51 and so I've lived quite a long time hiding and acting to survive and function. But socially and emotionally I never progressed and never understood why. I've never understood people and how they do what they do. I've never understood why people drop off when I start to feel safe and let them see me. So many things I couldn't do and so many odd things I couldn't stop myself from doing. Growing up in the 60's and 70's in Australia with parents and family that didn't want me led to plenty of scarring. This 'possible' diagnoses has already allowed me to give myself permission to be me and drop the survival masks. I'm sick of being friendless but am starting to feel ok about navigating progress.

Thanks for reading. Cheers
 
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Hi, welcome. I can relate the the giving yourself permission to be you. For years I survived by using mimickery, being the joker and abusing alcohol. I'm 34 and have only just begun my journey of true self discovery. I don't know about you but the struggles socially led me to pretend and act and basically blag my way through life.... So much so that I never really knew what I really felt or believed in, I just coasted along trying to say the right things to fit in..... It worked and I was lucky to have friends but I'm still very lonely despite being surrounded by people who love me
 
Hi MarkD67 welcome. Yes it's a journey isn't it? Glad you've made it here and I hope you'll find useful ideas and information here to help you feel more comfortable with what you are finding out about yourself. There's an upside!

:shavedice::pear::greenapple::grapes: :tomato::chestnut::coffee::custard: :shavedice::shortcake::pear::cherries: :strawberry::peach::friedshrimp::icecream:
 
Hi MarkD67, and welcome. I'm 53, diagnosed just last year. There are several people here in their 50s and older, so you might find some lived experience here of late diagnosis that feels familiar to you.
 
Hi Mark welcome! I’m 50 and was only diagnosed a couple of years ago. There are lots of us around who identify with your introduction. :-)
 
I'm another late diagnosed, albeit in my mid-30's.
When I first started researching ASD, this forum became a beacon of support, information, and validation. I hope you find answers that ease your pain and confusion. I accept the challenges I faced growing up undiagnosed in Australia and got passed the 'what if' game to come out the other side happy with who I really am and no longer stressed about who I should be. It is quite liberating actually. I'd be surprised if your self-discovery journey didn't bring you closer to your true self and inner peace. Letting go of other people's rules and opinions and demands is a weight everyone could do well to cast off. A cathartic diagnosis such as ASD might be the catalyst you needed to finally lead a life that is truly yours. Much happiness to come!
 
Hey everyone, thanks for the warmth. I'm hopeful for connecting and learning here.
I'll admit that the first few days after my psychiatrist gently hit me with it, I was almost joyful with relief. I've been battling complex PTSD from childhood trauma but too many unanswered questions. This puts so very many pieces of the puzzle together and tells me I'm not defective, just different. I am eager for accurate information and I'd like to know more about how others manage to navigate relationships in particular.... They've always stumped me... At least I can begin to grow into my skin more comfortably and live for me... I'm not sure what questions to ask, so thanks again for the warm welcome. Feel free to share any advice for the newly diagnosed or point me in the direction of some.
Cheers Mark
 
Welcome. I'm 49, informally disgnosed by a doctor and in the process of getting a formal diagnosis. I think you'll find that a lot of people here know exactly what you're going through.
 
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