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Hi! Recently diagnosed. Very scared.

heyitsalice

heyitsalice

Member
Hello! my name is Alice. I speak English and Spanish and I use she/her pronouns. I was recently diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome. It still feels strange to say.

Before introducing myself I would like to tell my little story. I was a lonely child - but always had one or two friends - extremely good at languages, nostalgic, self-taught gymnast, oddly good at public speaking, writing and formality. But nothing raised alarms in anyone, not even myself.

3 years ago I was diagnosed with OCD. And I felt "fine" with my diagnosis. I found a community, I got a lot of information, I learned to carry it. In the end it was just a disease and I had to learn to overcome it, right?
There was always something wrong, after three years of psychologists, psychiatrists and all kinds of therapies and medications nothing seemed to change. Yes, I learned to be more functional but I was still nostalgic, melancholic and "weird" I thought I would die like this. Feeling Nothing and too much at the same time.
It wasn't until a month ago that my psychiatrist uttered the words I never thought I would hear "I've been studying you these past few months and I think you might be on the autism spectrum" that made me want to laugh and cry at the same time. The following was very fast, looking for someone qualified to apply the ADOS-2 and ADI-R tests, having a date for them, taking them and finally -yesterday- receiving a report with the answer. "Autism spectrum disorder level 1, also known as Asperger syndrome"
I am very afraid, only my parents and I know about this. I am afraid of being autistic and at the same time not being "autistic enough"

I would love to read your stories and tips.
I'll be reading you! goodbye ❤
 
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Hello - It is a lot to take in , it took me a good year to come to terms with it after my diagnosis .

Learning about autism will help you learn about yourself .And don’t be scared . It is actually fascinating in some aspects .

Lost of people on this forum received a diagnosis later in life .
 
Moogwizard said:
Hello - It is a lot to take in , it took me a good year to come to terms with it after my diagnosis .

Learning about autism will help you learn about yourself .And don’t be scared . It is actually fascinating in some aspects .

Lost of people on this forum received a diagnosis later in life .
Click to expand...
Hey. Thank you so much for your kind words. It's good to find community even though I was afraid of doing it and reading experiences from people like you make me feel more hopeful.
 
Hello, it’s nice to meet you. I’m sorry you are feeling that way I know it is a lot to take in at the moment. Learning something new so fast can be scary especially since you have not had enough time to process everything. People who are on the spectrum have different traits and symptoms. We are all different, but experience the same issues in a way. I want you to know that you are not alone in your journey. It takes time to get things situated and figured out. I hope this helps you feel better.
 
@heyitsalice

You are very welcome .there are lots of threads here with information and personal experiences .

Also if there is something you need help with just start a thread , and let the comments commence
 
Welcome! I think you may be in a good place here to take it all in slowly and start learning about what it really means. Lots of people here have had anxiety when given a diagnosis or even the realization of self diagnosis, but learning as much as you can and relating to others who can understand could be really helpful to you.

Let us know if you need any help settling in and exploring the forum.
 
DaisyRose said:
Hello, it’s nice to meet you. I’m sorry you are feeling that way I know it is a lot to take in at the moment. Learning something new so fast can be scary especially since you have not had enough time to process everything. People who are on the spectrum have different traits and symptoms. We are all different, but experience the same issues in a way. I want you to know that you are not alone in your journey. It takes time to get things situated and figured out. I hope this helps you feel better.
Click to expand...
Hi! It's so nice to meet you too
Yeah it is indeed a lot to take. It happened too fast. Thank you so much for taking a time you comfort this messy human. I appreciate it a lot.
 
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Welcome! I'm several years into my journey and still learning new things on a regular basis, and I had expected a diagnosis before going into the journey, so don't feel a need to rush into anything, and take the time you need to digest the news and to learn more about yourself and how you can make yourself comfortable in whatever environments you find yourself in.
 
VictorR said:
Welcome! I'm several years into my journey and still learning new things on a regular basis, and I had expected a diagnosis before going into the journey, so don't feel a need to rush into anything, and take the time you need to digest the news and to learn more about yourself and how you can make yourself comfortable in whatever environments you find yourself in.
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Hi! Thank you so much ❤ I guess I just need to prepare for this aventure of a lifetime!
 
Rodafina said:
Welcome! I think you may be in a good place here to take it all in slowly and start learning about what it really means. Lots of people here have had anxiety when given a diagnosis or even the realization of self diagnosis, but learning as much as you can and relating to others who can understand could be really helpful to you.

Let us know if you need any help settling in and exploring the forum.
Click to expand...
Yeah. The main reason I joined (even though I was very scared to do it) was to find friends and people I can relate too. And who knows maybe someone will relate to my weirdness too! Thank you so much and I appreciate you taking the time to comment❤
 
I liked what you said about "not being Autistic enough." I feel that way sometimes; well, it IS a spectrum, and there is a place for each of us. My "official" diagnosis is fairly recent, and mostly a positive thing. It's a long-missing piece of a jigsaw puzzle, a door opening to an undiscovered room. Not all are willing to accept us for who we are, and that might be the most difficult part for me.

Personally, I've been helped quite a bit by some of the various video series on YouTube. I very quickly realized, I'm not alone and my experiences on this journey are not unique. After a lifetime of thinking otherwise, that's a revelation in itself.
 
heyitsalice said:
Hello! my name is Alice. I speak English and Spanish and I use she/her pronouns. I was recently diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome. It still feels strange to say.

Before introducing myself I would like to tell my little story. I was a lonely child - but always had one or two friends - extremely good at languages, nostalgic, self-taught gymnast, oddly good at public speaking, writing and formality. But nothing raised alarms in anyone, not even myself.

3 years ago I was diagnosed with OCD. And I felt "fine" with my diagnosis. I found a community, I got a lot of information, I learned to carry it. In the end it was just a disease and I had to learn to overcome it, right?
There was always something wrong, after three years of psychologists, psychiatrists and all kinds of therapies and medications nothing seemed to change. Yes, I learned to be more functional but I was still nostalgic, melancholic and "weird" I thought I would die like this. Feeling Nothing and too much at the same time.
It wasn't until a month ago that my psychiatrist uttered the words I never thought I would hear "I've been studying you these past few months and I think you might be on the autism spectrum" that made me want to laugh and cry at the same time. The following was very fast, looking for someone qualified to apply the ADOS-2 and ADI-R tests, having a date for them, taking them and finally -yesterday- receiving a report with the answer. "Autism spectrum disorder level 1, also known as Asperger syndrome"
I am very afraid, only my parents and I know about this. I am afraid of being autistic and at the same time not being "autistic enough"

I would love to read your stories and tips.
I'll be reading you! goodbye ❤
Click to expand...
Hello there! I'm new here too. Your final sentence resonated with me very much, and I share your similar fear.
 
Uppity Creek said:
I liked what you said about "not being Autistic enough." I feel that way sometimes; well, it IS a spectrum, and there is a place for each of us. My "official" diagnosis is fairly recent, and mostly a positive thing. It's a long-missing piece of a jigsaw puzzle, a door opening to an undiscovered room. Not all are willing to accept us for who we are, and that might be the most difficult part for me.

Personally, I've been helped quite a bit by some of the various video series on YouTube. I very quickly realized, I'm not alone and my experiences on this journey are not unique. After a lifetime of thinking otherwise, that's a revelation in itself.
Click to expand...
I like your words very much! In my diagnosis, the words 'it wasn't a perfect fit' were written alongside the final verdict. In a way, I find it to be a very apt description.

youtube too led me down the path of discovering my autism, as well as chatting with a mentor once.
 
Welcome. I was diagnosed when I was in college then dropped out. I always felt different from my cousins. My sister is fully autistic but growing up I did not understand why I use to do a few things she did.
 
Don't be scared to be diagnosed, --nothing changed in you--, just that maybe you can get more support now or relate more about other having the same issues.
 
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