"What does it mean?" Is a question I get asked a lot when it comes to my drawings. So I figured I'd break it down on this occasion. As I wrote on Thursday when I started this drawing, the trigger was having to cut off a friend.
Pink Moon - a nod to the genius and melancholy of Nick Drake. His last album before he committed suicide. His works weren't truly appreciated in his time, a deep seated fear of my own given how my attempts to make my artwork commercially viable have all failed so far. Not suicidal though, and the ideation of such things has passed. Mental health has greatly improved in recent months - and Thursday's events remind me of how important it is to associate with the right kind of people.
Missing puzzle pieces for eyes. Searching what's missing. Yet I know that whatever is missing won't be found in others, but is to be found within.
The owl relates to a shared spirit animal with the person I had to cut out. The leaves in the eyes relate to an exercise we carried out in our final Circle together.
The world being turned upside down is symbolic of their revelation before I cut ties. An about face from 2 weeks worth of things they'd been saying. Things were turned on their head in that moment, and I realised either they were a liar, or they were willing to look past all the blatant issues and continue in a self-destructive cycle. Either way, I was not joining them down that road. I wished them all the best, and I bear them no ill will. But, as above - whatever they are searching for will be found within.
Crying - a lot of my characters in the past year have been crying. The empty and oversized heart shaped hole. Again, a missing piece that won't be filled by others. A void that must be healed and filled from within. This will be coloured in my ongoing space/void theme which has been a prolonged feature in my work. A nod to the shadow self, with the placement of this void being all the more strateg and symbolic in my work.
The Carnyx is the instrument I received recently. It was used at a time when tribes ruled this country, and men would play them as they marched into battle. The height of the horns would carry the sound across a large area - to encourage the men to fight, and to instill fear into their enemies.
The message it carried was something that came to my mind, and I wanted it spelled out in runes:
"Be still in the storm."
The black flame on the candle seemed like a novel idea. When you were drawn to their light, you were blind to their darkness. After colouring the flame black, I realised this person had recently watched Hocus Pocus, and their is a black flame candle in that movie.
The sun is buried underground in this picture, and yet still sits where the sky should be, had the world not been turned upside down.
The wilting Bluebell flower - this flower has many symbolic meanings in spiritualism. It relates to love, humility, gratitude and kindness - traits I saw, and then things got turned on their head. Hence it wilting, and sat ontop of a world that now sits upside down.
A rich, deep blue for the sky. A medium recently said to me that I was like the ocean - seemingly calm on the surface, but with a hidden depth. So many people in life have said I'm chilled out company. It's only those I'm closest to who see the maelstrom that lurks beneath.
So there we have it. I'm sure more could be gleaned from the picture by others. But that's my take on what I drew, and why I chose it. I still tend to draw instinctively. I might briefly sketch a character in pencil before committing. But I find I don't erase and backtrack much, so proportions and anatomy remain idiosyncratically wonky.
Ed
