hello. i don't know if i'm in the right subforum. i am posting this on behalf of my brother. i will warn ahead of time this story very serious story with some unsettling moments so if you don't want to read something upsetting then turn back now.
my brother is 16 years old. he has aspergers, and perhaps some other neurological disorder but we are not sure - he is currently undergoing a test to see if he does. i am 10 years older than my brother. i will admit i don't know very much about aspergers, i only know that he was diagnosed with it a few years ago, and he has shown signs of it since he was very young. i see him at least once a month, but not enough to spend a lot of quality time with him that i'd like. my parents are divorced. my brother lives with my mom. he sometimes sees my father, but only to go do something fun and he doesn't help raise him. so he basically doesn't have a father in that sense.
it has been difficult with my brother ever since he hit puberty. he does not seem to able to control his impulses, and has been caught at school masturbating in front of people, and tends to ogle women very inappropriately. his social skills are very bad, he doesn't have any real friends. he's kind of growing up to be what society would deem a "creep", as much as i hate to say it. the thing is that he means very well, but because of how he acts it can be very difficult for him to have a normal conversation. it's like one moment he is extremely focused, and the next he is off on another planet. he also tends to repeat himself many many times over.
his biggest problem though is that even though he may know some things that he thinks of doing are wrong, he does them anyway. and later on he doesn't understand why he did it even though he knew that.
just recently this problem hit its tipping point - he was caught at a local gym exposing himself to a woman who called the police. he is now no longer allowed there and will be arrested if he enters the premises again. my mother said she saw the tape from the police officer who visited our house, and she doesn't think he did it on purpose and neither does the officer, but that's still the situation. thankfully the victim isn't going to press charges after my mother spoke to her, although he is very lucky that she was understanding.
he's almost gotten into this kind of trouble at school, but fortunately he goes to a smaller private school that understands his issues better than a public school would. but still, he is walking a thin line and i'm afraid someday he might show this darker side of him to his group of friends at school and will truly be alone in that environment.
but what this has culminated to is that my mother has decided that she needs help to stop him from going down this path. professional help from people who are experts in helping people with things like aspergers. he has a therapist, he's had one for years, but it has not been very effective. he's taken medications in the past, but i don't even know what they were for.
bottom line is, i know nothing i say to my brother can magically fix this problem, and my mom is the only one who really raises him and spends the most amount of time with him, and she cannot handle these problems on her own anymore. she is looking for somewhere to send him for a few months to maybe get some professional help to adjust his behavior and send him on the right path.
the thing is that i don't know if anything like this exists. i was hoping to seek some insight from people here as to what is the best course of action to help my brother. i don't even know if this is the right place to ask, and if it is not please guide me in the right direction. i just want what is best for my brother and my mother, and i know that we can't do this on our own anymore, and if we don't get him help then this will get worse and he could end up in jail, which would be a horrible and dark place for my brother who only has his family and no one else.
i just want my brother to be able to make the right decisions for himself, to have friends and lead a normal life. he's getting older and i feel like he's missing out on a lot because of his problems. he's a good kid, but he has issues that i know myself or my mother cannot help him with as well as someone else out there might be able to.
thanks for reading, and i am grateful for any advice.
my brother is 16 years old. he has aspergers, and perhaps some other neurological disorder but we are not sure - he is currently undergoing a test to see if he does. i am 10 years older than my brother. i will admit i don't know very much about aspergers, i only know that he was diagnosed with it a few years ago, and he has shown signs of it since he was very young. i see him at least once a month, but not enough to spend a lot of quality time with him that i'd like. my parents are divorced. my brother lives with my mom. he sometimes sees my father, but only to go do something fun and he doesn't help raise him. so he basically doesn't have a father in that sense.
it has been difficult with my brother ever since he hit puberty. he does not seem to able to control his impulses, and has been caught at school masturbating in front of people, and tends to ogle women very inappropriately. his social skills are very bad, he doesn't have any real friends. he's kind of growing up to be what society would deem a "creep", as much as i hate to say it. the thing is that he means very well, but because of how he acts it can be very difficult for him to have a normal conversation. it's like one moment he is extremely focused, and the next he is off on another planet. he also tends to repeat himself many many times over.
his biggest problem though is that even though he may know some things that he thinks of doing are wrong, he does them anyway. and later on he doesn't understand why he did it even though he knew that.
just recently this problem hit its tipping point - he was caught at a local gym exposing himself to a woman who called the police. he is now no longer allowed there and will be arrested if he enters the premises again. my mother said she saw the tape from the police officer who visited our house, and she doesn't think he did it on purpose and neither does the officer, but that's still the situation. thankfully the victim isn't going to press charges after my mother spoke to her, although he is very lucky that she was understanding.
he's almost gotten into this kind of trouble at school, but fortunately he goes to a smaller private school that understands his issues better than a public school would. but still, he is walking a thin line and i'm afraid someday he might show this darker side of him to his group of friends at school and will truly be alone in that environment.
but what this has culminated to is that my mother has decided that she needs help to stop him from going down this path. professional help from people who are experts in helping people with things like aspergers. he has a therapist, he's had one for years, but it has not been very effective. he's taken medications in the past, but i don't even know what they were for.
bottom line is, i know nothing i say to my brother can magically fix this problem, and my mom is the only one who really raises him and spends the most amount of time with him, and she cannot handle these problems on her own anymore. she is looking for somewhere to send him for a few months to maybe get some professional help to adjust his behavior and send him on the right path.
the thing is that i don't know if anything like this exists. i was hoping to seek some insight from people here as to what is the best course of action to help my brother. i don't even know if this is the right place to ask, and if it is not please guide me in the right direction. i just want what is best for my brother and my mother, and i know that we can't do this on our own anymore, and if we don't get him help then this will get worse and he could end up in jail, which would be a horrible and dark place for my brother who only has his family and no one else.
i just want my brother to be able to make the right decisions for himself, to have friends and lead a normal life. he's getting older and i feel like he's missing out on a lot because of his problems. he's a good kid, but he has issues that i know myself or my mother cannot help him with as well as someone else out there might be able to.
thanks for reading, and i am grateful for any advice.
