How do you fight/distract yourself from fears and overthinking?

[Tired]

All of us have rational and irrational fears, and as an overthinker I often start thinking about the worst cases and horrible problems, which may or may not come in the future, so beating yourself over them over and over just drains me mentally and physically.
I only touched this topic with my therapist, so I'll hopefully learn how to successfully control my mind, before it does the leap jumping from "life is good" to "I'm afraid to live." I am a rather rational and analytical person, so while I'll try my best to fix the rational fears with resources which i have (not much, but I'm still hopeful), I am very much in the mercy before irrational fears.

How are you coping with fears? What are you fears? Do you have any suggestions on how to just stop being in the anxious overthinking mode when it kicks in?

 

[kriss72]

I'm not good at dealing with fears, I either run away, or continue on my path pretending all is good, neither are good solutions. I'm also over thinking and analyzing to the point where I can't take action - just waiting for the adhd to kick in and make me take a spontaneous choice that isn't thought through in any way

Sorry no general suggestions in how to deal with it as I don't know - except talk about the fears...

 

[Misty Avich]

Talking about them, either to friends and loved ones or on internet forums, usually helps. Trouble is I do it too much on internet forums which then causes new problems, as someone always ends up offended even though I wasn't talking about them.

 

[Neonatal RRT]

As your thread title suggests, you need to have distractions. I can often tell from the many threads on here that many of us are sitting at home with nothing to do or think about except ourselves and our situation in life. Talk about a situation where no good can come of it, this dwelling on what we don't have, what we want but can't seem to get, the people in our lives that treat us poorly, the social anxieties, the wanting to hide away, and so on. None of this is good.

I can't tell anyone how to overcome their fear and anxieties, but what I do know is that if you're not thinking of them, but rather something else, it's usually a better day. Seriously, make yourself useful. Be active. Do something. I really mean that. Have a series of short and long-term goals. Wake up with a purpose. Help others. Focus on a special interest. Grow food. Volunteer. Whatever that is in your life, but keep the mind off of yourself.

 

[Misty Avich]

Actually my fears and anxieties are still there no matter what I do

 

[blue_bird]

As others have suggested, talking about it is probably the best advice. Don't let things bottle up. Let it out to someone you trust. Also I'm trying to rationalize to myse if my fear is really as bad as I make it out to be. I'm trying to tell myself, "So What?". "So what if something happens? Is it really as cataclysmic as you make it to be?" Hopefully if I can convince myself that something isn't as horrible as I expect, then perhaps the fear will slowly subside.

I'm very sensitive so I guess I fear anything that threatens my emotional security.

 

[Forest Cat]

I tend to just work with something. Like grabbing my chainsaw and cut some firewood, mowing a lawn, washing a floor, painting a wall, doesn't really matter what I do, just something I can focus on that makes me think about something else and wears me out a little. As Neonatal RRT mentioned, distractions. I distract myself. I learned a long time ago that the worst thing I can do is sit down and do nothing. Or sit down and talk about everything that bothers me. Then I start thinking too much. I have some old memories that are a little catastrophic for me to think about, I can't think about it, it's too much for me to handle but sometimes those memories force their way to the surface. So sometimes I need to be distracted and working with something works for me. And I get a lot of things done that way, so that's a plus. Two birds with one stone.

 

[jsilver256]

IMO we just aren't built to be happy unless we're busy. I feel like in the past, a lot of people with milder autism would have been craftsmen and farmers. That would be nearly impossible today with regulations, rents, marketing, taxes, social media, networking, commercial rental, codes, etc. My husband runs a small business and 90% of his time is spent in this modern artificiality of "complying" and the other 10% is doing what he actually loves.

 

[marc_101]

How are you coping with fears? What are you fears? Do you have any suggestions on how to just stop being in the anxious overthinking mode when it kicks in?

I have strategies although I don't usually feel anxiety (I also have problems naming feelings).

The important part is that you think about yourself. 1) When does it happen? 2) Are you alone or with others? 3) Does it happen the day after not sleeping well? 4) Is it triggered by an event? 5) Have you tried medications? 6) Have you tried engaging in physical activity when it happens? 7) Have you tried meditation or CBT?

One suggestion: our brains are kind of funny. Sometimes we "know" something is true when we actually don't really know it. So next time you have fear of, say, dying in a storm, write it down and explain to yourself how exactly that is supposed to happen. Don't talk to yourself because that doesn't work. Try to write it down. You may realize that the fear doesn't make much logical sense.

 

[Judge]

In my own case all I can do on occasion is to laugh it off, when being able to rationalize that my most immediate response itself is not rational. Knowing how easy it is for me to overthink just about anything.

Having OCD as well compounds it all too.

When I need to divert such feelings to mentally calculating the immense odds of something bad actually happening. And to go on my way until the next thing comes along that I overthink. That's about it.

 

[Misty Avich]

I have OCD that seems to be caused by my RSD. I overanalyze and obsess over things posted about me online and I just can't rest until it's dealt with. I think I just agonise over the unfairness of a situation if I feel I have been treated differently, like double standards.

 

[KevinMao133]

Good question. Great question

For me, I find solace in myself. Knowing I’m safe and knowing I’m in a good place helps

Also, talking to my mom helps

 

[Rodafina]

@Tired Anna

I agree with those who said to get active. Anxious rumination is less likely to take over when you are physically engaged in a task or activity. Staying active not only helps our mind to focus on more productive ideas and feelings, but also can tire us out so that when it is resting time, we can actually rest or sleep instead of listening to our brain ruminate.

Seeking total control over our thoughts and feelings can actually give them more power. Sometimes, it is important to have the worries, feel the anxiety, and sit with uncomfortable feelings. I agree with those who said to get it out of your head - this can be through talking, posting, or writing about your feelings. Many folks here, myself included, have benefited from having a journal where they can vent their thoughts and feelings.

Do you have any suggestions on how to just stop being in the anxious overthinking mode when it kicks in?

One suggestion that I received that was helpful (although sounds silly) was to schedule time to worry. Allow your mind to worry as much as it wants for about 10 - 15 minutes in a day and then say to yourself something like, "Okay, time's up. Time to focus on other things now." I realize it may seem a bit silly, but for me, it really worked.

 

[Xinyta]

All of us have rational and irrational fears, and as an overthinker I often start thinking about the worst cases and horrible problems, which may or may not come in the future, so beating yourself over them over and over just drains me mentally and physically.
I only touched this topic with my therapist, so I'll hopefully learn how to successfully control my mind, before it does the leap jumping from "life is good" to "I'm afraid to live." I am a rather rational and analytical person, so while I'll try my best to fix the rational fears with resources which i have (not much, but I'm still hopeful), I am very much in the mercy before irrational fears.

How are you coping with fears? What are you fears? Do you have any suggestions on how to just stop being in the anxious overthinking mode when it kicks in?

I have lived my whole life, so far, doing what you described. Allowing videogames, soda, and food be my mechanisms to try to suppress and hide the pain. That solves nothing.

The real solution is not as simple but absolutely necessary to healing:

- Identify what triggers you to seek hiding pain and going to coping mechanisms.

- Identify symptoms of a potential mental spiral.

- Seeking activities, hobbies, and exercise to counter rising negative feelings.

- Jounal emotions, thought processes, and events that happen throughout the day.

- Never give up when you hit a bump in the road. We all have bad days. But not dealing with it, makes a single bad day a whole week to even month event of negativity.

 

[Tired]

Thank you all for answers, it's so many of them, I feel rather moved reading how much people always struggle in their own heads, and how they genuinely want to help others by giving advices.
I'll try to make myself busy, but even when I do physical things, I still can very much think about fears and stuff, I multitask in that annoying way. And I don't have contact with my own family, because they were toxic and I cut them off, plus I have only one friend irl, so I'm very much a hermit in that way, but I hope my psychologist will help.
Thank you again, you're all very kind <3

 

[Tom]

Distraction mostly. If you are thinking about something else you can't think about what you are trying to avoid. But I never learned any real cure.

 

[Dagan]

Like everyone else...either you have a journal to vent into...or a close friend you can vent to...or it's off to the coping mechanisms, which are often just the things you have loved most your whole life and do in free time. Mine would be music, writing, playing a game (chess or even a video game perhaps) or putting on a film that I know I can escape into. Also, like I just mentioned in another thread, these are all ways that you are basically getting very reserved (because it's just you and one other person or just you alone), and you are beginning your way of processing what has you overwhelmed.

 

[Shevek]

I'm afraid of stupid people with strong opinions. If I were younger, I'd be very afraid of the class war, AI, pollution, climate change, and war. As it is, I don't want to put up with much more age deterioration, but I'm afraid that all my work to combat those threats, and all my stuff gathered for that work will just go to waste.
I keep plugging away, trying to enlighten people doing things the hard, wasteful way when I think I see an opportunity, but to balance that with some "wins" I make things or fix them. There are two brothers who wound up with a big boat supply business. They still build boats themselves, calling it their "sanity time." Wood never has emotional reactions, it just gives honest feedback.

 

[lovely_darlingprettybaby]

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All of us have rational and irrational fears, and as an overthinker I often start thinking about the worst cases and horrible problems, which may or may not come in the future, so beating yourself over them over and over just drains me mentally and physically.
I only touched this topic with my therapist, so I'll hopefully learn how to successfully control my mind, before it does the leap jumping from "life is good" to "I'm afraid to live." I am a rather rational and analytical person, so while I'll try my best to fix the rational fears with resources which i have (not much, but I'm still hopeful), I am very much in the mercy before irrational fears.

How are you coping with fears? What are you fears? Do you have any suggestions on how to just stop being in the anxious overthinking mode when it kicks in?

I have fears and many regrets too which can lead to rage attacks for me.

Overthinking is not good and has not served me well in my life.
What helps is going out someplace quiet like a pub or library or in nature because the thoughts break apart and come clearer.
It is good to shake it up a bit particularly if you think a lot and live in a very small space or toxic environment
And do not stay glued to devices.
You know there are many things you can do without devices try for people who hace trouble limit it to a few chunks during the day.
Like an hour in the morning and afternoon and turn it off at night and there are plenty of other things to do, if you go out somewhere even like the pub you could talk to a few people.
I can understand autistic people being scared I get like that too but sometimes you find a friendly face.

 

[MNAus]

My anxiety comes from overthinking. My overthinking comes from a) having a brain that is finely tuned for pattern identification, ordering, systems and structure, and b) having a strong dislike of future risk and uncertainty which may lead to experiencing negative emotions. The latter stems from experiencing negative emotions strongly (example: witnessing someone eating by themselves triggers an internal feeling like Munch's Scream).

I'm pretty good at thinking, so my mind can quite cheerfully keep multiple narratives that provoke a feeling of horrific dread on simmer at the same time, ready to boil over at any particular trigger. I'm poor at resolving things to completion, so they sit there in my head chattering away like a hen party on a Friday evening flight to Prague (joke for Europeans there) without every getting solved.

Drinking a few beers is a good way of calming it all down, but of course alcohol is a depressant, so not a long term solution.

I'm currently using melatonin at night which is doing a VERY good job of sending me off to sleep without the feeling that a bar brawl is about to kick off in my head. If I wake in the night I just go back to sleep rather than have that Dolly Zoom moment in Jaws. In the morning I drink (count them) 4 espressos and take 400mg of L Theanine as well as some Bacopa. And, so far, it seems to make a difference. Without the caffeine I lose the busy anxiety but just end up doing nothing. The caffeine seems to make me alert, the L Theanine makes it calm alert.

Of course consult a medical professional and YMMV, but this seems to work for me.