How to tell if a child has aspergers

[Dragon's Tooth]

Hi all

I'm keen to know more about identifying asperger's or autism in children. I just got back from visiting my family and I met all my nephews for the first time. One of them, who is just coming up three years old, has some worrying signs that he might be an aspie or even autistic.

But I'm a little confused by his behaviour. What I know about aspergers in kids is that they like to fixate on something, usually movement based, are shy, maybe a little behind developmentally and prefer to sit in a corner playing on their own than with others. But my brother's little one kind of fits that and kind of doesn't. So I was hoping maybe some people on this forum who have children with aspergers might be able to help.

My brother's son is extremely shy. He clings to my brother exclusively usually for around fifteen minutes when he's in a new situation. He will actually cry and get very upset if anyone approaches him during this time and will run away and hide when approached or run to my brother. Even still after settling in he seems very scared of anyone. I tried to go near him a couple times but he was always quick to move out the way. Even touching his head was a major. I think I got one cuddle from him and never did he direct any conversation in my direction. I tried looking for the lack of expressions and so on and he didn't show as many as other children his age. My brother and one of my sisters had their children about two weeks apart and the two cousins are like chalk and cheese developmentally. My brother's son hardly speaks and only speaks a couple words at a time, where as my sister's son uses sentences and is quite articulate. My sister's son also smiles a lot unlike my brother's son.

My brother's son loves music however. He loves to make noise. loves guitars. We took them shopping and he loved the big band that had set up in the shopping area. I hated it because it was too loud for me but not this little guy. He loved the music and was dancing to it.

I went to visit my brother at his house and I remember my little nephew hid behind the fridge for most of the visit and when dragged out he got very upset and would run back to the fridge and make nonsense noises.

If anyone who has aspie kids could maybe shed some light that would be a big help.

 

[LittlePuff]

Sounds more autistic than milder Aspergers. Has he been to a Dr..?

 

[smith2267]

Aspie kids tend to:
prefer the company of adults, sound older when they talk, get bullied a lot, like routine, stim, be clumsy just to name a few. Not all have every characteristic. I stimmed and had a few tactile fetishes as a kid (still have em)

 

[silent ABAB]

Aspie kids tend to:
prefer the company of adults, sound older when they talk, get bullied a lot, like routine, stim, be clumsy just to name a few. Not all have every characteristic. I stimmed and had a few tactile fetishes as a kid (still have em)

You have fetishes to? Is that an aspie thing? Also, one thing to note is if he's not talking much at a young age, then starts talking a lot to people(still shy of course), they may or may not contain things about the obsession(saying he has one by that time). That sounds a lot like me from a while ago, although I was with the piano instead of guitar, didn't bother to learn it until later though.

 

[smith2267]

You have fetishes to? Is that an aspie thing? Also, one thing to note is if he's not talking much at a young age, then starts talking a lot to people(still shy of course), they may or may not contain things about the obsession(saying he has one by that time). That sounds a lot like me from a while ago, although I was with the piano instead of guitar, didn't bother to learn it until later though.

It doesn't have to be a sexual thing to be called a fetish. Yes, it's an aspie thing to like (or dislike) certain textures. I really like the feel of woman's pantyhose (in my hands--I don't put them on) and stucco.
When I was a small child I would rub women's legs if they had hose on

 

[Dragon's Tooth]

My brother doesn't want to take him to a doctor and label him. I feel in this case though it might be an advantage as he seems in the more severe end. I have my reasons for double checking the autism thing.

my brother's son can talk but he doesn't talk a lot. My brother has a lot of difficulty with communication and so does his partner. So that could be why his son is not a talker. He's very very big on musical instruments ... I think he likes the sound of them. We joked that he would be the next big thing in heavy metal lol.

 

[music.forlife7]

Aspie kids:

Show more interest in objects and things instead of their peers

Can have a too loud, or too soft, unusual tone of voice

Have poor motor coordination

Have trouble socializing with their peers or family